The Elf and The Mortal
by x0Arisax0
Summary: AU: He was an elf from a foreign country and she was a mortal. Together they were destined to face and overcome their weaknesses and... maybe fall in love? -REWRITTEN
1. Prologue

_**- The Elf and the Mortal -  
**_

**Prologue  
-xx-  
**

Once upon a time there was a far away realm.  
In it was located a vast country that was known to its inhabitants as Valleria.

Due to its vastness it was divided into four smaller territories.  
One in the east. Estelle was its name. Another in the north. Rastellia was its name. The third in the west. Cellest was its name. The last in the south. Lathernia was its name.

All four of them were of equal beauty and grandeur.  
With forests and lakes spread throughout their vicinity. With high mountains and extensive meadows.  
With valleys and fields. With rivers, known as Evellin, Arenstil, Senarion and Menadiol, that coursed across their lands and brought them together.

Yet one of them was more remarkable by just an ounce.  
This, was Estelle which was also known as the Center of the Land.

The establishment of Valleria goes back to the first days of the dawn, when the world was still young and taintless.

It was a peaceful realm but it was different from the ones we are accustomed to.  
Why, you are wondering.  
It was because of its abiders...

In this land was residing the immortal race of the Eldars, or as they're most commonly known, elves.

Their leader was a young male whose name was Li Syaoran.

He had short chocolate-brown hair that was constantly tangled and untamed.  
Furthermore, long bangs covered his keen auburn eyes.  
His stature was tall and the structure of his body well-built.

Syaoran was a strong young elf, skilled in archery and horse-riding.  
But these were not his only qualities...

What earned him the respect and acknowledgment of his kin was his earnestness, humility and care for others.

His destiny was to fall in love with a mortal...

In the far east there still stands a land that is known as Japan.  
In its most western point there was once a small town called Tomoeda.  
Tomoeda was an urban place that still withheld some of its former peacefulness. It was a town where nothing out of the ordinary ever happened.

It was inhabited by the mortal race of firmars, or as they're most commonly known, humans.

Among them was a young female in the first years of her adulthood. Her name was Kinomoto Sakura.

She had light brown hair that fell a few inches below her shoulder-blades and most of the time was tied in a loose side ponytail or an equally loose side braid.  
Moreover, the edges of her bags were slightly covering her bright emerald eyes.  
She was of average height and her silhouette was quite slim, but not too skinny either.

As a child she was sweet and kind, but while growing up became more distant.  
In addition to that, her mood was constantly glum and she suffered from often crises of cyclothymia.

Nevertheless, this remote and grouchy personality was only a mask she had created to protect herself from getting hurt. There was a reason for the creation of that mask of course. A reason that was hidden inside a dark page of her childhood.

Nightmares of that time still haunted her dreams, disturbing the peacefulness of her sleep.

Therefore, she had no friends, being afraid to trust or expose her true self to anyone.  
Even her own family.

Her only company was an old diary which was filled with her memories and secret emotions

The days of her loneliness however were soon to change. Someone was meant to enter her life out of nowhere and turn everything up-side down.

The time for the elf to cross paths with the mortal was gradually approaching...


	2. 1: Crossing Paths

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura. CLAMP does. I do own the plotline of this story though.

* * *

**Chapter 1: Crossing Paths  
**

**-xx-**

Everything concerning our story began a chilly afternoon on the early September inside a house located in the suburbs of Tomoeda. It was a fine residence that belonged to the Kinomoto family.

Their family consisted of four members.

The first member was the husband and father, Kinomoto Fujitaka. He was a well-known archeologist that was currently giving lectures at the University of Tomoeda.

The second member of the family was the wife and mother Kinomoto-Amamiya Nadeshiko. She was once working in the area of modeling and was well-known in the entire Japan for the beauty of her photographs. After the birth of her first child with Kinomoto Fujitaka though, she decided to quit her profession and devoted herself into motherhood.

The third and fourth members of the family were the two children.

Older was Kinomoto Touya. He was twenty-five years old and was a second year graduate student of the Department of Applications of Informatics in Management and Economy at the University of Nagoya. Currently he was working towards his Μaster in Economics and Business Administration.

Younger was our heroine, Kinomoto Sakura. She was nineteen years old and was a graduate student from the Seijou High School. In fact, her graduation took place the last spring after being held back a year due to several causes. Spending her teenage years of her life in the Middle and then High School wasn't the best of her life.

Thusly her decision was not to spend another four years of her life pursuing further education. It wasn't one of her best resolutions but it didn't necessarily mean that she wasn't smart. Instead, she was more interested in spending her days reading books. Novels preferably. Her secret ambition was to one day become an acclaimed author, just like her favorite writer, Elkon...

Therefore her knowledge was great and her imagination vivid, qualities gained via ceaseless reading.

To outsiders the Kinomoto family was an outstanding family, but there was one interesting and at the same time strange detail about them hidden behind the walls of their house. It was the fact that the daughter was neglected despite the claim of both parents that their love for their children was equal. In fact it was always the son that had their attention and received their constant praise.

It was an unfair treatment. One that she received for years, even before _that_ incident. One that had her thinking that her presence was useless and meaningless to them.

Her days were full with it, but it was the only reality she was familiar with...

The years came and went and Sakura grew up with their passing. By then, she was entirely accustomed to  
The lack of communication and the complete abandonment. She had learnt to be strong and depend on no one but herself. By then, being all alone was a natural thing to her. So natural that she didn't even think that maybe it wasn't something she deserved.

But deep inside her, she longed for something. She didn't know exactly what it was, but it made her feel lonely.

Lately however, both Nadeshiko and Fujitaka were showing an inexplicable interest for her well-being. She would be extremely happy if that happened several years ago, when she truly needed them, but the Sakura of the present was only bothered and secretly scared by all this newfound attention.

The only thing she desired was her peace and quiet.

The afternoon our story began to unfold would be ordinary hadn't an argument between mother and daughter erupted. For the Kinomoto household nevertheless, it was a common phenomenon. Recently these quarrels were becoming a daily routine.

The cause was once more the same.

Nadeshiko was trying to gain her daughter's favor by resorting to rather embarrassing and childish methods and Sakura was desperately trying to avoid her mother's attention without losing her temper, but miserably failing.

Perhaps she was only overreacting, but arguing with her parents was the only way she could think of to keep the situation as it was. She was so familiar with it after all.

"Why? Why are you doing this suddenly?" Sakura asked, trying not to raise her voice and lose her calm despite the uncomfortable of the situation.

"Doing what little honey?" she replied coolly.

The young woman tensed up, her icy demeanor momentarily dropping as unwanted memories flooded her mind.

It was only momentary though. Her defenses rose up once more with a shook off her head and she was the aloof Sakura again.

"Don't call me that. Don't you dare. Don't you dare care about me after everything you've put me through. Don't you dare. I won't allow you to." she hissed, her eyes sending a nasty glare towards her mother's direction. Her voice was harsh and her words spiteful, but they were no less than what she thought that the woman in front of her deserved.

It was bothersome to her though to see her mother unaffected. Silently, she gritted her teeth, the imaginary sound, ringing in her ears vicious and full of venom. Οutwardly, she crossed her arms watching as her mother opened her mouth to respond.

"How can I not care about you?" Nadeshiko replied, her emerald eyes that reflected her daughter widening in surprise.

Her simple response though was not the one Sakura expected...

"I don't know, you tell me. How can you not care when up until recently both my parents completely ignored my existence? Tell me,_ mother _because I'm curious to know..." the young woman bitterly countered, using the word mother mockingly, sarcasm dripping from her voice.

Inside, all she wanted to do was let the tears that secretly welled in her eyes out. Slowly, her greatest weakness was coming to the surface and she could do nothing to stop it from revealing itself.

No. She wouldn't allow such humiliating thing to happen. Instead, she bit her lip as hard as possible, suppressing the sudden urge to cry and forcing herself to concentrate back to the woman in front of her.

"Nonsense. Your father and I were always aware of your existence, my daughter. We just failed to prove it to you. That's why we wish to compensate." the mother answered, taking a step towards the young woman that used to be her little girl and clumsily tried to hug her.

Her gesture was not welcomed though as her daughter retreated a few steps and made a face that depicted how she was really feeling.

Sakura from her point of view was staring her mother through wide, almost teary eyes, her face a mask of bewilderment and disbelief. The tears she had so desperately trying to withhold now threatened to flood her eyes.

No. Crying is for the weak, she reminded to herself. She couldn't afford to be weak. She had to be strong like always and put on an indifferent facade. But despite her silent words, this time she found it so difficult...

"Too late for that. I don't want your attention anymore. I don't want you to compensate and most certainly I don't want your pity. What I want is my peace and quiet. Nothing more and nothing less."

Her words were cold as they left her lips and she watched the expression on her mother's beautiful face finally saddening. She couldn't bring herself to care much though as she turned her back to the older woman and headed to the front door.

The atmosphere in the house suffocated her. She needed some air...

"Where are you going to?" Nadeshiko asked weakly, the hurt evident in her voice.

Again, Sakura couldn't bring herself to care enough about it.

"I'm heading outside obviously. I need some air." she replied apathetically, not bothering to turn and face her mother, closing the door behind her with all her might, a smile of satisfaction curving her lips as soon as it hit the frame with a loud thud.

She let out a deep breath once outside. One she hadn't realized she was holding. The chilly air of the early autumn that welcomed her was refreshing. A pleasant change from the unbearable situation in her house.

Without further ado, she started walking down the street heading to her favorite of all places.

The local park of Tomoeda. It was a beautiful place that was quite far from where she now was. Not that she minded though. The distance would help her calm down and think.

Once in a while a colorful shop window would catch her eyes and the merry voices of the rest of the pedestrians reached her ears. So happy...

'I wish I was one of them.' Sakura thought to herself and allowing a wistful sigh escape from her throat.

It wasn't until later that she reached her destination. Instead of stopping though she kept walking further and further inside the park until she arrived to her favorite hidden spot.

It was a rather isolated area; her private paradise. In the middle of the location was growing a tree she was quite fond of. It was an old oak that seemed to be standing right there since the begging of all things.

The young woman had chosen this particular location because no one else came there and furthermore it always was so serene. Her soul somehow managed to sooth and her troubles seemed to vanish just by being there.

This time however she wasn't alone, for a pair of auburn eyes that she failed to notice was closely observing her movements.

Her undivided attention was focused on the tree which she greeted with a wide smile. She always felt that it waited patiently for her arrival. Her grin only grew wider at the thought.

"Hishashiburida Old-oak, _it's been a while Old-oak_, don't you think? "she spoke, her voice soft and coated with fondness as she sat on the grass.

Her back leaned against the tree's large trunk, making herself comfortable. And then inhaled deeply, relishing on the rich and refreshing odors that assaulted her nostrils.

Strangely enough there was a new scent hovering into the air. One that she had not notice before. Curiousuly, she sniffed a little bit, feeling the aroma tickling her nostrils. It was lawn, blended with wet soil...

Its smell was so comforting that she couldn't help but sniff once more, greedily absorbing as much as possible.

It was a few moments later that her nostrils were completely satisfied. And then she opened her old diary and gradually began writing down the recent events.

**September 10th 2009 **

_My dear diary,_

_ this afternoon I had an argument with okaa-san.  
It's not very unusual these days, is it?  
_

_After all these years of neglect, I found out today that she and otou-san want to compensate.  
Now, that's unnatural. Right?_

_I don't know what to think._  
_Do they really expect me to simply forgive and forget everything?_

_Sakura _

_P.S. I know it may be ridiculous to feel that way and maybe it is, but for a reason I can't help being scared. _

_Dare ka tasukete. _Someone help..**  
**

After having unraveled her thoughts to her most cherished treasure, it was as though a heavy load was lifted from her shoulders and maybe it was. Letting a sigh of relief escape from her throat, she put her diary to the side and closed her eyes, allowing herself to relax, even if it was just for a second.

"Nē, what do you think that I should do Old-oak?" she asked the tree, fully knowing that it was unable to answer her question, but feeling like she had to consult it anyway.

Yes, it was weird to have a tree as an advisor, but it was not only a tree. To her it was also a dear friend, even though unable to actually talk to her.

What she did not expect though, was to receive an answer.

"Telling them what you really think and feel is a good option..." a male voice from somewhere above her, advised.

"Nanidesu ka? _What?_ " Sakura said surprised and shot her eyes open in a state of complete shock.

Old-Oak could actually talk? And in a man's voice?

She shook her head, dismissing the preposterous thought. No. That most certainly was not the case.

She stood up, her eyes scanning the area around for the owner of the deep voice. She failed to scan the area _above_ though. As no one was found, she sat back down, shaking her head amused with her imagination.

"My imagination seems to run wild these days." she muttered, slightly laughing to herself.

But the voice spoke again. This time closer to her.

"No, it's not your imagination…''

It was clear that whoever its owner was, he was apparently amused by her reaction.

But Sakura wasn't amused in the least anymore.

"Dare ga aru? _Who's there?_" Sakura inquired somewhat scared and got up in an instant, getting away from the tree as fast as possible.

Her curiosity kicked in though. Unable to resist, she looked at the trunk as if expecting to see a face morphing there.

"Look up.'' the voice instructed.

She did what the voice asked her to and obediently turned her eyes up. Much to her astonishment her eyes met with a pair of the most captivating auburn eyes she had ever seen. They belonged to a young man who was looking down to her grinning.

"Who are you and how did you climb up there without me noticing you?" she asked, surprise reflecting into her eyes, but instead of giving her an answer, he jumped down off the branch, landing effortlessly in front of her.

Needless to say, he was standing on two feet...

"O-oi!" a loud shriek of surprise escaped from her lips and for some reason the stranger seemed troubled by the young woman's reaction.

"Don't be so surprised, I mean you no harm..." he said reassuringly and offered her a comforting smile.

Despite his comforting words and smile however, Sakura remained nervous and somewhat suspicious of him. She backed away a few steps from him, establishing a good distance between them and when she felt safer examined warily the intruder.

He had short, messy hair which was chocolate-brown as the color and long bangs which sloppily covered his eyes. Her eyes followed the edges of the bangs that covered his eyes and studied their colors more carefully.

His eyes were a peculiar mixture of red and brown. It was the most amazing color that she could only dream about. And yet...

Yet there was something familiar with it.

Her eyes then followed the outline of his figure and realized that he was also tall and well-built. Not too muscular, but not too thin either. A great combination, if she was allowed to add.

And then his scent tickled her nostrils. She sniffed a bit and almost gasped in surprise.

Lawn combined with wet soil.

So he was the source of this relaxing smell. A wonderful odor, if she was allowed to add.

And finally she noticed this aura of calmness and reliability that radiated from his presence. In general, he didn't seem dangerous at all.

But despite all this and despite her side notes, she didn't let her guard down just yet. She wouldn't be fooled by appearances and first impressions. In the end, all that glitters is not gold. That, she knew all too well...

"Anata wa, dare? _Who are you?_" she repeated her earlier unanswered query, eyeing him cautiously, careful not to let the distance between them shrink by any sudden move of his.

The stranger for some reason seemed hurt by her wariness, but nevertheless answered her question. Truthfully or not, remained yet to be seen.

"I'm Li Syaoran. May I ask you for your name?" the young man asked, his deep voice resonating to her ears.

"And why should I tell what it is?" she countered cautiously.

"Because I told you mine. Don't you think it's unfair for me not knowing what your name is?" he reasoned.

She cringed, not liking his reasoning one bit.

"I'm not sure if I can trust you yet." she said skeptically and saw a frown joining his brows.

"I'm a very trustworthy person, so please tell me. I won't tell anyone else, I promise..." he guaranteed, his words sounding sincere but also a little humorous.

It might have only been her imagination, but she did not appreciate being laughed at by any means. And so she shook her head in denial. He was stubborn, but so was she.

"Apart from trustworthy, you are also very stubborn. You know that?" Sakura opposed, her arms crossing in front of her chest and also a frown just like his, joining her brows.

"I admit I am. The same could be said for you though. I don't understand why you are so enigmatic though." he replied, a little sigh escaping his lips.

She was obviously stubborn, but so was he.

"I'm not secretive, I'm just being careful with strangers. It's just common sense." the young woman corrected.

"And may I ask the reason of your cautiousness?" he questioned curiously, but soon realized that this was a line he should have never crossed.

Clouds covered her face and her cautious expression altered to an angered one. She seemed ready to explode.

"I don't want to be rude, but this matter is none of your business." she told him off in a rather harsh way.

She didn't want to be so offensive of course. But during the times when her temper was provoked, she had no control over her emotions.

She saw the young man biting his lip as though silently admonishing himself for his foolishness and indeed that was the case.

"I didn't want to aggravate you, I'm sorry." he apologized and saw her features soften a bit. The fact that her temper was able to change within seconds was extraordinary and in a way amazed him.

He wasn't aware though of the real reason behind her mood-swings.

"You don't understand it, so there's no need to apologize. I'm the one who should be apologizing for losing my temper for a moment there. I'm sorry." she too apologized and felt a little lighter. After all, he wasn't the one to blame for her bad mood to begin with and venting her spleen on him would be completely unfair.

"It's alright. I don't blame you. It was my fault for poking into matters that I'm not familiar with." he assured her.

And then an awkward silence established itself between them for a few moments.

His eyes searched for hers and when their gazes finally met, they were both lost in a sea of emerald and auburn. It was as if someone had performed a spell between them. Their eyes remained locked for several moments, until Sakura was no longer able to hold his gaze. Her eyes diverted from his and faced the ground instead.

For a reason that she was not able to comprehend she was feeling rather embarrassed and self-conscious. Since when was she timid in front of others? Wasn't she 'Sakura the aloof' after all?

So why was she affected like that?

The young man hesitantly took a step forward, moving closer to her. She, from her point of view, was too distracted to actually notice that the distance between them was gradually closing and when she did notice, it was too late. He was already standing in front of her, only a foot and a half away.

Gasping in surprise, she made to move away but his hand was already reaching for her, capturing her wrist in a not-too-tight grip. The sudden contact made her cheeks flush slightly.

"Daijōbudesu ka? _Are you okay?_ " his voice asked and it was obvious that he was worried.

"Hai, daijōbuda. _Yes, I'm alright._" she responded, trying her best to ignore the crimson color on her cheeks releasing her wrist from his hold and soon after re-established the distance between them.

Then a question crossed her mind.

"I know that it doesn't concern me, but what were you doing on my tree?" she asked curiously.

His eyes flickered with pure playfulness and in his voice echoed a boyish tone mischief

"I'll let you know, only if you promise that afterwards you'll tell me your name. Can you promise me that?"

The young woman sighed. He was really stubborn. But it was only fair. He had already told her his name after all and even though she refused to call him by it, she had to admit that she secretly really wanted to...

"You are so stubborn. Fine I promise to tell you my name." she agreed rather reluctantly, but her need to know had to be quenched.

"This is not the first time I come here to tell you the truth and the main reason of my being here is you. I have been observing you." he admitted and for a reason his cheeks flushed slightly.

Sakura's forgotten shields were raised to the sky at that instant and she took a few steps backwards, the distance between them only getting bigger. Her eyes eyed him suspiciously and realized that he had just proven to her the saying she knew all too well._ 'All that glitters is not gold.'_

"Why have been you watching me?" she asked suspiciously, still refusing to admit that she was momentarily fooled by his appearance. But not anymore...

"You're an interesting person."he trailed off, refusing to admit the real reason he had been watching her. Enough damage was already done. Right now he had to be more careful with his words.

"What is so fascinating about me?"

"It's that you always come to this isolated location by yourself. You never have any company other than that book of yours and you are always seeking advice from a tree. I can see that your eyes are glimmering with loneliness that is hidden behind the strong mask that you're always putting on. You are constantly seeking for solitude, but I think that deep inside you, no matter how much you deny it, you don't wish to be alone. It only makes me wonder. Why are you on your own if you can't stand being alone?" he asked concerned, reading through her hidden thoughts and deepest emotions.

He was right.

She didn't wish to be alone, but couldn't bring herself to trust anyone. Not after what happened _that night_. Not after what that beast almost did to her.

"Why do you care?" she inquired shakily, the tears she had been withholding for so long finally falling from her eyes before she could will herself stop them.

The young woman shook her head fiercely, hating herself for being so puny. She failed to notice that he was little by little closing the distance that separated them once again. His hand then reached out and the touch of his fingers was a light stroke of comfort on her moistened skin.

His thumb gently wiped the evidence of her tears away.

"I don't know what the source of your problems is, but everything is alright now. You don't have to cry anymore." he whispered, his deep voice resonating into her ears. Oh, how much she wanted to believe him!

"Why are you so kind towards me?" she whispered.

She wasn't accustomed to such kindness. It felt bizarre and foreign to her.

"It's rather simple. I care about you and I can't stand seeing you like this. So please stop crying, a smile suits you better..."he pleaded and Sakura was only startled even more by his words.

No one, not even her own family had ever shown such care to her. So why now and why so suddenly an absolute stranger claimed that cared about her?

It made no sense.

"Why are you saying these thing to someone that is a stranger to you?"

"Because it's true. I do care about you."

"Stop saying all this nonsense, please. It's not funny. It's not funny at all." she pleaded, her voice cracking at the last words.

"It's not nonsense, I'm serious. I swear. I honestly care about you. I'm willing to do anything within my power to prove that I'm not joking around and.. I think I'm starting to like you... " the last part came out of his lips before he could prevent the eight words. But now that they were out, he wasn't going to take them back.

His voice was rather determined and when his hand made to wipe her tears away again he did not expect her reaction.

This time his gesture was not welcomed and Sakura slapped his hand away with every ouce of her strength before it could actually reach its destination before backing away from him and his horrendous lies.

'Idiot.' she mouthed and sent him a nasty glare that was meant to convey all of the bitter feelings that dwelled within her. She then turned around, running away as fast as her feet could carry her towards her house, his words resonating into her ears and haunting her already troubled and confused mind.

_'I honestly do care about you. I actually think that I like you...'_

Care and like. Two very simple words that nobody had mentioned to her before. Words she didn't even know that existed. Words that sounded foreign to her ears. Words that managed to awaken a long-forgotten warm feeling that was sleeping inside her heart.

The young woman wanted to have faith in them, but they sounded so unbelievable.

And yet, for some unknown reason were so comforting to her wounded heart...

* * *

**Author's Note:** Yes my friends I'm rewriting this! To those who have read the original, I hope you'll like this version better. To those who had started reading the original but didn't get to read the last chapter, a huge apology. And finally to those who are reading this for the first time, I hope you'll enjoy reading it...

**Edited at:** 8/10/2012, 09:42 a.m.


	3. 2: Tears and Comfort

**Diclaimer: **I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura in any way, CLAMP does. I do own the plotline of this story though...

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Quenya or Sindarin. These two elfish dialects belong to their rightfull owner Tolkien.

* * *

**Chapter 2: Tears and Comfort**

**-xx-  
**

She ran and ran. As far as her feet could bring her. She had to get away from there. Away from that stranger that had only spouted nonsense.

Tears were stinging her eyes, but this time she did not try to prevent them from falling. It was pointless anyway. As much as she wanted to will them stop, the tears stubbornly disobeyed her wishes. So she let them stream. It was like the current of an untamed river; wild and unyielding.

But it was also ironic to her…

She always claimed to be 'the aloof Sakura', the one that was strong and fierce at all times. And here she was crying her eyes out. She was so weak and pitiful. It was so shameful.

Her feet kept running on their own accord, leading her out of the park and back to the place she had come from. She didn't want to go back, but she had to reach the secret sanctuary that was her room.

Once she was yet again on the still bustling street, she allowed herself to halt and take a deep breath. One that was meant to calm her nerves down and allow her to think properly again. But once she attempted to organize her muddled thoughts, she miserably failed.

She took another breath and then she simply burst.

"That idiot!" she burst a little louder than intended, causing the scandalized looks of the rest of the pedestrians. A slight flush of embarrassment painted her cheeks and so she rushed to continue on her way back, this time walking the rest of the route.

The rest of her outburst was inward.

'How dare he? How dare he mess with me like that? Saying such words like they were nothing and then expecting me to believe him! I can't believe his audacity!'

But as she was thinking this, a flash of a certain pair of auburn eyes and the way their owner had looked at her invaded her mind, disturbing the flow of her thoughts and causing her heart to beat fast for a reason that nothing had to do with her previous sprint.

'And yet… Why do his words sound so real and why do I feel like I have to believe him? Most of all, why is my heart beating like this?'

"Please my heart, stay still…" she muttered absent-mindedly and her eyes widened in shock, realizing what she had just said.

She wouldn't allow this to continue. No, absolutely not.

She shook her head fiercely, effectively dismissing any thought that concerned him and proceeded to lock the earlier events in the deepest corner of her mind, where the rest of the marked as 'unwanted' events were kept. She then mentally tossed the key away.

The events were to stay locked in that carefully designed drawer, never to be remembered or discussed again. Further involvement with the issue was banned and were to be punished with severe forfeitures.

Little she did know that fate had different plans…

Sighing in relief, she realized that she was standing in front of her house. Her feet had obviously brought her there without her noticing. Looking behind her back, she saw that the sun had almost set.

When had it gotten this late?

Quickly, she crossed the yard and soon was standing in front of the front door. Before entering, she wiped the telling evidence of tears away and assumed the facade of 'the aloof Sakura'. Once her pretense was ready, she reached for the knob and pushed the door open.

She hadn't managed yet to take her shoes off and step onto the wooden floor of the foyer, when Nadeshiko popped out of nowhere.

Her voice was pain-streaked when she spoke and it almost managed to move Sakura. Almost.

"I'm really sorry Sakura. I'm sorry for hurting you without even realizing it. I know I have been a horrible mother to you, but please forgive me."

Said person looked at the one before her with disbelief. Maybe her ears were playing tricks with her, but after seeing her mother's expectant expression, she realized that she hadn't heard wrong.

"Do you really expect me to forgive and forget you? Do you really think that everything would be solved with just an apology? You have done so much to me, too much if you ask me. I'm sorry, but I can't accept your explanation and most certainly, I can't forgive or forget. Or rather, I'm not sorry."

Her words her cold, poison dripping from her voice as she spoke, but it was only the truth. The truth as she had seen and experienced it for most of her life.

"Why are you so cold and harsh? All we're asking is for a chance to be proper parents for you. Is it too much?"

"It _is_ too much to ask for. All you have been doing these years is hurting me, whether you realized it or not. So if I can protect myself from getting hurt again, I will. Even if it means that I have to be unsympathetic."

Nadeshiko lowered her head in shame. Everything was true. All these years they have been too preoccupied with their son. It was only fair that their daughter felt bitter. But was it really too late to compensate?

"I understand. You have every right to be disappointed with us, I'm sorry if I became a bother to you."

For a moment there Sakura was confused. Did her mother really understand? And if she did, was she really willing to finally be an actual mother to her?

"Just give me time to think about it."

The words left her lips before she could stop them, but for a reason she didn't regret them. Was it odd?

Yes, it most certainly was…

"As you wish. I just want to say this, I really want to be a true mother for you Sakura. The same goes for your father. Sorry it took us so long to realize."

"Goodnight... mother." the young woman hesitated a bit, but added the word 'mother'. This time it wasn't used as a sarcastic mean and for a reason she felt really light after the word felt her lips.

"Good night, Sakura." the mother replied affectionately, watching as her daughter turned to head upstairs. It had been so long since the last time she was really called mother by her and it made her happy. Somehow this little development was encouraging.

In the mean time, and as she was climbing the stairs that led to the second floor, Sakura was uncertain and baffled as to what the right decision was.

The words she said to her mother was nothing less than the truth as she had experienced it for most of her life. She knew better than anyone that those who have hurt us in the past are bound to hurt us again.

And then were the consequences of getting hurt. This time it would feel even worse because she would have tasted for a little while what being cared for really meant. She wasn't certain if she would be able to endure such depression for a second time.

But deep down, she wanted to give her parents the opportunity to prove themselves. To care and spoil her like any parent would their child. To simply have them there for her.

Was she really willing to abandon the safety her pretense provided her? Or better yet, was she brave enough to?

She was facing a dilemma to which there were two possible solutions.

On the one hand she could do as her parents wished. Forgive and forget with the possible risk of getting hurt again. In the other hand she could just refuse and resume living her life as it currently was. But it was a life that offered her only bitterness and isolation...

Was she willing to continue living like this or move forward with her parents on her side?

When she reached the door to her bedroom, a decision was still not done.

With a sigh, she twisted to knob to the right and the door opened, revealing her bedroom. It was a medium-sized room. Not too big and not too small either. Perfect to make her feel at ease.

The walls were a pale orange color. Her bed was in the center and across from it was sitting a large bookcase with several books adorning it. Beside the big furniture was her desk and right above it was a window that viewed the yard below. Next to her bed was a nightstand with a white porcelain lamp on it, another book was resting on top of it. The closet that contained her clothes was embedded in the wall just behind the entrance to her room. And finally there was also a chiffonier where she kept her little things.

But the great advantage of them all about her room was that it had a personal bathroom.

So without any further delay she headed to said location.

She didn't need to worry about a towel because there was always one, hanging from the hoop on the wall beside the shower stall. All she had to do was step inside, open the faucet for the shower phone and let the lukewarm water work its magic.

And it was exactly what she did.

A sigh of contentment escaped from her lips when the tepid water made contact with her skin. She felt her muscles relax under its spell and rejoiced at the sensation. She was able to let go of her troubles at last…

"It feels so great..." she muttered to herself, allowing the water to slide down her body. She could just stay in there forever and watch everything that bothered her getting washed away by the water's vehemence.

A low chuckle left her lips as she realized the impossibility of such idea.

Once ready and refreshed she exited the bathroom, now going to her chiffonier to dig up one of her little things from the mess that prevailed inside the drawer.

Having worn a pair of pajamas as well she went back to the door that separated her from the rest of the house and locked it. Only then she felt completely safe and ready to surrender into the comfort that the mattress of her bed and also her fluffy duvet offered.

But as she got ready to finally call it a day and go to sleep, her mind decided to start functioning again, processing the conversation she had with her mother. The words they had exchanged instead of evaporating lingered to her conscience, triggering the gears of her mind to begin considering the options again.

She shook her head, wanting to forget everything about the matter for the moment and just lay on her bed. All she wanted was to give herself in the arms of Morpheus. The words though remained stubbornly glued to her mind, not leaving her do as she wished.

Never had she imagined that one day her father and mother would be willing to be true parents to her. Not even in her wildest dreams.

The question remained though...

Was she willing to drop her pretense and the security it offered her?

But in the other hand, she couldn't simply forget everything that had happened in the past and forgive her parents for their negligence towards her, pretending that the lot was only part of her vivid imagination. She just couldn't.

Yet deep inside her Sakura didn't want to be condemned into living a life of absolute solitude.

Which was the right and which was the wrong solution?

She couldn't tell.

She sighed and shook her head in part confusion and part disappointment.

"I'll figure this out in the morning." she muttered to herself and heard the disenchanted response of her conscience.

"_Don't postpone for tomorrow something you can easily do today_." it countered but received her telling off answer.

"Shut up and let me sleep."

And it indeed shut up as she ordered it to, allowing her to finally let go into unconsciousness.

Her eyelids became heavier. The softness of her mattress and the snugness of her duvet doing their wonders, helping her to lose the battle with awareness.

Morpheus welcomed her in his homely embrace at last...

Moments after she fell asleep, a pair of auburn eyes emerged to her window. It belonged to Li Syaoran.

Feeling ashamed of himself because of his foolishness, he had taken the initiative to follow her home. Just to make sure she returned back safely. It _was_ his fault that she was upset and if anything happened to her on the way would also be his fault. He would never be able to forgive himself if he weren't there to protect her from any harm.

And so there he was, watching her as she slept peacefully under the protection of her duvet.

A small smile curved his lips. She looked serene and fragile; like a nymph of the lakes...

And yet serenity wasn't what he sensed emitting from her sleeping form. It was a mixture of incomprehension, disappointment and agony.

He was quite sure he was the cause of such emotions.

Looking back at their encounter, he spotted countless mistakes on his behalf. Surely everything he had said was nothing less than the mere truth, but he shouldn't have hasted like he did. If only he could take the last hour back!

Sighing at his own foolishness, he came to a conclusion.

He had to apologize for his reckless words and to do so he had to be at the local park tomorrow.

What he didn't know though was if he would be forgiven. He wasn't very confident about that.

The words that left his lips were derived from the bottom of his heart.

"Goheno nin._ I'm sorry._ No ce ammaer ab lû thent. _May you be better soon_. Mennai lû vin achenitham, mára mesta. _Until we meet again, goodbye._"

He then turned his back to the window and prepared to leave. Tomorrow was going to be a new day and he decided to make it count. And as he was thinking so, he simply disappeared into the night...

The next afternoon Syaoran was indeed at the local park, hoping to meet again with the young woman and properly apologize to her.

He waited,

and waited,

And waited for her arrival, but in the end she did not come...

Giving up his effort to compensate so soon was not what he intended to do. He planned on waiting for her, no matter how long it took because if he admitted defeat, the years he had spent searching for her would be meaningless.

She was stubborn. But so was he.

And so, he kept waiting...

But while he was waiting, Sakura had made her decision and it was to forgive her parents. Of course she hadn't forgotten about the past, but she had put it behind her. And it had paid off.

Just like her mother had promised, Fujitaka and she the last two weeks had done nothing else but spoil her. Sakura secretly admitted that perhaps she was too old to be spoiled, but she appreciated their efforts. She deserved it after all, so she wasn't really complaining.

The only one noticeably displeased with the current situation in the Kinomoto household was the older son, Touya. Whenever he happened to see the satisfied expression on his sister's face he would huff and storm out of the room. But Sakura had decided not to let anyone or anything to ruin this. Besides, her brother was to return back to Nagoya soon.

After years and years of solitude, life was finally smiling to her and she was going to take full advantage of it.

And so two weeks passed and although contend, Sakura missed visiting the local park. She had refrained from doing so partially out of fear of meeting _him_ again and partially because she wanted to spend as much time with her parents as possible to make up for the previous years. Nevertheless, no matter the reason, the issue remained. She missed going to her favorite place.

And so on the fourteenth day, she decided to go back...

That afternoon when she got out of her room she was met with silence. She knew that her parents were absent because they had informed her that morning. For some strange reason her mind decided to reminisce _that night _when it had also been so quiet. She shuddered at the memory and shook her head, erasing effectively the unwanted recollection. It was a thing of the past and she was done with it.

Or so she thought...

Not wanting to dwell any longer in the empty house, she hurried to the front door and left the house behind her without second thought.

September was soon to be replaced by October and the chilliness of the air was no wonder. Even so she inhaled deeply, the fresh air filling her lungs. The scenery around her was changing as well. The green color of the leaves was slowly giving its place to the warmer and friendlier shades of red and pale orange. To her, autumn was the best season of the entire year.

With thoughts filled with warm colors and inviting landscapes, she made it to the familiar place. There too, the change of colors and scents was obvious. Wondrous what can happen during an interval of two weeks.

Old-oak was there, dressed in a beautiful shade of golden-brown and patiently waiting for her arrival as always. Its leaves were now more withered than the last time she saw the tree. Some of them had already fallen, creating a comfy cushion on the ground.

Sakura couldn't help but smile to herself.

But it faded soon when she noticed the difference in the scents that hovered in the air. There was one that dominated against the rest. One that tickled her nostrils pleasantly.

Lawn blended with wet soil...

And when she looked more carefully at the base of the tree she noticed _him_.

He was there, sleeping peacefully and strangely enough, he seemed to belong with the environment around him. To be one with it.

And even more strangely, she felt a smile curving her lips.

Out of pure curiosity, she approached the tree and sat on her knees, right in front of him. Of course she should have been more cautious, but at that moment her curiosity was taking control and when that happened, she simply couldn't resist.

His back was leaning against the bole and legs gathered to the side. His hands were crossed and nestled onto his abdomen. His hair was more muddled than she remembered it to be. And finally his head was tilted a bit to the side, causing his bangs to cover a part of the right side of his face.

And then there it was.

Trickling from his eyes was a faint path of moisture, evidence that he was crying even though unconscious. It was such a heartrending sight that only caused her heart to tighten.

In an instant, she forgot about the hurt feelings she harbored for him. Right now, she had to comfort him...

Her hand didn't hesitate when it reached for his face, wanting to erase the tears that haunted him. Her fingers wiped away the moisture carefully, not leaving a drop behind.

But it was then, that auburn eyes slowly opened and looked at her with uncertainty.

Ashamed of getting caught in such an embarrassing act, Sakura made to pull her hand back. Before she could even blink her eyes though, he caught her palm and with a swift movement, she was pulled to him.

Feeling confused and also her cheeks flushing, she tried to free herself from his tight embrace. But it was to no avail.

She tried to talk. To ask him to let go. The words refused to leave her lips though. He was the first to break the silence.

His voice was low and desperate.

"I thought you disappeared. I thought I lost you. Don't flee again, I'm begging you..."

He had decided to wait for her and he_ would_ wait for her, no matter what. But there was always a dream about her that haunted his sleep.

In this dream of his she was riding a brown horse with black mane, his horse, and they were fleeing. She was looking back to him, waving and a sad smile was gracing her lips. Her figure was gradually disappearing from the animal's back. He always tried to run behind them, to stop them. To prevent them from disappearing. But he could not move. The only thing he was able to do was look at them getting further and further away, abandoning him.

He couldn't afford losing anyone else precious to him. He was a brave person, but if such a possibility became true, it would break him...

But she was there now. Right in front of him. It was a miracle. A wonder like no other.

Hesitantly, he let her go and watched as she straightened her back. To his surprise she didn't retreat much.

Her voice rang in his ears and it was like music. A hymn for his tormented soul. She wasn't annoyed. Just concerned.

"I don't know why you were crying, but if it'll make you feel better I promise not to go anywhere."

His auburn eyes searched for hers, looking at her a bit uncertainly. Even so, he nodded.

As though sensing his uncertainty Sakura offered him a small reassuring smile.

"I won't disappear."

She didn't know why she was acting so nobly and amiably towards him, but at that moment couldn't bring herself to care enough about it.

It was his turn to act courteously. When he spoke his voice was gentle, even though apologetic.

"Forgive my thoughtless words. I was insensitive towards you and your feelings. I sincerely apologize, will you please forgive me?"

Sakura shook her head amused by his formality, barely able to hold back her laughter. She didn't know why she was so amused, she just was. To her surprise, she wasn't as angry as she initially was after their first meeting. She wondered why.

Her next words only confirmed how she currently felt.

"There is nothing to forgive, I just want you to promise me one thing."

His response came without hesitation.

"Anything. I will promise you anything."

"Never say anything unnecessary again."

He didn't reply immediately and Sakura watched as he bit his lip, obviously debating about something. But then he looked back at her and got to his feet, his tall figure looming over hers. She imitated him.

When he spoke his voice was still gentle, but this time full of seriousness too.

"I won't take my words back because they were nothing less than the truth. However, I'm not going to repeat them. At least not until you're ready to hear them again, because losing you is a risk I'm not willing taking twice..."

When he finished talking, she could feel her cheeks flushing all shades of red. She didn't have time to reply nevertheless because he was talking once more.

"I'm Li Syaoran. I won't ask for your name if you're not willing to tell me what it is."

Sakura laughed, unable to hold back her laughter any longer. The sound was clear and genuine. She didn't know why, but she was finally to introduce herself properly.

"I'm Sakura. Kinomoto Sakura."

She didn't realize it at that time, but it was that moment when the mask she had been hiding for so long, began falling.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hi everyone, this is the second chapter. I hope you enjoyed reading...

**Edited at:** 8/10/2012, 10:03 a.m


	4. 3: A Decision To Make

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura in any way, CLAMP does. I do own the plotline of this story though...

**Disclaimer: **I do not own the poems "_Not Once, Not Ever" and "The Eagles"._ They belong to their rightfull owner who is no one else than Tolkien...

* * *

**Chapter 3: **

**A Decision to Make**

_To have the power to decide with no regrets…_

**That is the meaning of one's true strength…**

Time was steadily passing and it had already been two and a half months since the day that Sakura had first met with Syaoran. During this period of time the young woman had come to know the young man better and had even began progressively unmasking herself. Their friendship was slowly, but gradually deepening.

Together they were fated to face and overcome their weaknesses...

Sakura very soon came to realize that he was an honest and caring person; a fact that little had to do with her first impression of him. The young woman now knew that he was deriving from a foreign country; something that explained perfectly his odd sense of clothing, but she wasn't complaining.  
Indeed he chose uncommon colors for his blouses and black or pure white for his trousers. Nonetheless he was nothing near an eyesore and she couldn't refuse that.

Syaoran wouldn't say what the name of his motherland was, a point that only caused Sakura's curiosity to become restless. He had also mentioned that back home he was the leader of his people. She was very surprised to learn this detail about him since he didn't seem much older than her.  
Not wanting to be nosy though, she hadn't asked him about his age yet.

The only thing he seemed reluctant to talk about was his family.

His face had turned distant when she had first questioned him and for some reason his auburn eyes were clouded by ache. She couldn't quite comprehend what the reason behind his hesitation was, but judging from his depressed face she could tell that it was something agonizing for him to remember. So she didn't ask him more questions.

Sakura wasn't going to blame him for not being eager to let her know everything about him…

Everyone has their secrets and she was going to respect his silence given that she was also hiding a dark truth about her past. An ominous secret she had never spoke of to anyone; a secret which she was afraid that was able to cost her everything she had recently gained.  
No; losing a dear friend was certainly not worth risking. So she kept quiet…

It was an afternoon in the heart of November that the friendship which bonded them started altering. That exact afternoon the two friends had made plans to meet up at the park as usual. The first one to arrive to the meeting place was Syaoran. This time the young man was dressed in a rust long sleeved blouse and a pair of plain black trousers. He greeted the tree and sat on the roots waiting for Sakura to arrive.

The young woman arrived ten minutes later dressed in a lilac sweater with black stripes across its length and a pair of black slightly loose jeans that were with-held in place by a pair of grey braces. She found the young man sitting on the tree's base, humming an unfamiliar to her ears song.

**_"Dannen le_**  
**_A ú-erin le regi_**  
**_Rang ail le iestannen_**  
**_Lû ail le tegin na hen._**  
**_Gwannach o innen ului_**  
**_Ú lû erui, ului._**

He didn't seem to notice her presence and the young woman didn't want to interrupt him, so she kept listening...

_**Orthannen im vi ól**_  
_**Coll e dû**_  
_**Or hiriath naur**_  
_**Na rovail mae sui 'waew**_  
_**Man prestant i ardhon?**_  
_**Cerithar aen illiad dim úthenin?"**_

He was chanting in a foreign language that the young woman had never heard before. It was bizarre and yet the sound of each word that left his lips was unique, wonderful and enchanting. His face was once again distant and in his voice was distinct a tone of melancholy.

Its presence was faint, but it was still there.

Sakura couldn't comprehend the meaning of his song, but even so she could easily sense his feelings emitting from the lyrics.

Hurt. Sadness. Longing for a lost person...

It was now obvious that his heart was loaded with faultlessly hidden soreness. She could perfectly sympathize with him because her heart was also piled up with pain.

His voice slowly faded as soon as the song ended and by then Sakura's eyes were welling up with tears. It was happening again.

She was crying without being able to stop. She hated being weak.

However, this time her tears weren't caused by annoyance, but compassion for a matter she wasn't even able to comprehend. But it was insignificant to her since his voice was enough to help her realize that he needed someone to comfort him as much as she did.

Soon it would be exactly five hundred years since the day of their deaths. It had been so long, but time wasn't able to ease at the slightest his ache.

Instead, recalling them was getting more and more painful for Syaoran. He had stopped weeping though from the moment that she entered his life. Her presence had given him hope...

'Sakura will be here at any minute. I don't want her to think that I'm weak.' he thought and put a strong front.

He was lost in his thoughts and became aware of her attendance only after hearing someone sobbing. He saw the person who occupied his thoughts in front of him weeping for a mysterious reason. He became worried. He hadn't done something to upset her again, had he?

He was more careful with his words ever since their first meeting. So if it wasn't something he said or did, then why was she sniveling so helplessly?

"Why are you crying Kinomoto-san?" he said hesitantly afraid of a possible outburst of anger which never came.

Sakura didn't answer him at first. Instead she stood there with tears moistening her eyes looking at him incredulously.

How could he be so calm, when in his heart was hidden so much pain? How could he pretend that everything was alright?

She couldn't understand.

"How can I not cry after hearing your song?" she returned the question with disbelief in her voice.

Syaoran was surprised.

It had been so many years since the last time he performed in front of others; in fact he refused to do so since they died. Sakura though had caught him off guard and heard his song.

"You heard me singing?" he repeated.

"I did. I couldn't understand the meaning of the chant, but your voice was enough for me to realize that you're in pain."

It was his turn to remain speechless.

His joyful hymns of life had turned into mourns after their deaths; anyone from his kin would have known if they happened to overhear his performing. However, she had seen trough him without understanding the meaning of his mantra just by hearing his voice. He was utterly astounded.

His dream so many years ago was definitely right in the end...

"Everything is fine. You don't have to worry about me." he tried to deny his weakness and pain, but she saw through his lie.

The young woman sat on her knees in front of him and enclosed him in her tiny embrace as tightly as her powers allowed her.

"It doesn't matter if you're not willing to tell me what has been troubling you, but lying about it is more painful to me Li-kun." she spoke.

"I don't want you to think I'm powerless."

"I would never think that about you, but you have to understand that you're not alone anymore, I'm here for you." she said softly.

"Thank you. Hearing you saying this means a lot to me, I can't begin to describe how much." he whispered.

After that he realized that he was still being embraced by her. He hastily pulled back and could have sworn that for a brief second her eyes flickered with disappointment.

However, it might have been only a ploy his imagination.

Then the two friends were drowned into complete silence which none of them seemed eager to break. Minutes passed slowly and a slight breeze became evident in the atmosphere. Despite the fact that Sakura was dressed in a thick blouse, she began shivering and as she was shifting her position trying to get a little bit warmer, her arm brushed accidentally against Syaoran's.

This little contact made them both blush.

"I'm sorry." she apologized avoiding to face him and only then became aware of their closeness.

Her heart started racing.

"It's okay. Don't worry about it." he said and also avoided meeting her gaze.

He tried to convince himself that their fleeting contact was an unintentional and insignificant accident, but he couldn't stop his heart from racing.  
Tension came upon them until the young woman decided to break the awkward silence that was dominating again between the two.

"Nē, Li-kun? It's been two and a half months since we first met and maybe I'm crossing the line by asking you this, but can I call you by your first name?"

"Of course, but is it alright for me to call you Sakura?" he questioned and inwardly prayed for a positive answer.

"It's perfectly fine. I'm happy that now I can call you Syaoran; it feels like we are closer. It may sound funny, however I always believed that keigo takes apart people instead of bringing them closer." she said and grinned widely, but he had stopped listening as soon as she had spoken his name.

Syaoran.

When coming from her lips it echoed as a different name; a name with new meaning. A name that was beautiful and matchless...

Never before in his entire life hearing someone voice his name had given him more happiness than the bliss he was now experiencing.

Never before in his entire life was he more satisfied and fonder of his name than he now was.

Oh how much he loved the sound of the three syllables that formed his name uttered by her lips…

He glimpsed at her and saw her happily chattering about something he obviously didn't pay attention to. He secretly followed with his eyes the lines of her lips moving up and down as she kept talking. Her once clouded face was now more cheerful and he thought that her emerald eyes were now glimmering brighter than the sun. She was so attractive…

He smiled to himself and then came back to reality as soon as he heard his name being intensively called.

Syaoran looked towards her and saw the young woman staring at him…

"Are you sure you're alright?"

"Of course I am; why shouldn't I be?"

"Because you were grinning to yourself and didn't hear me calling you." she replied and brought her face mere inches away from his, examining it as if expecting to find traces that would give away that he was feeling sick.

Syaoran saw her eyes inspecting him and started flushing, affected from the closeness. He tried to look away, but her eyes were drawing his like magnets. He shook his head fiercely and quickly got up, establishing a good distance between them for their sake; especially his…

Sakura got up as well and arched her head to the side whereas looking at him with a confused expression.

Why was he evading her so suddenly? Had she done anything wrong without realizing it?

"Nē Syaoran, did I do something that offended you?" she asked nervously and approached him slowly with small steps.

"No, of course not." he replied, his back still facing her.

"Then why are you avoiding me?" she questioned with a hurt tone in her voice.

The young man slowly turned to face her and only then she noticed the crimson colour that was spreading on his cheeks.

"Why are you flushing?" she asked her eyes wide from surprise.

"I'm not." he denied despite the obvious flush that adorned his cheeks.

"Yes, you are."

"No, I am not."

"Yes, you are."

"No, I am not."

Yes, you are."

"No, I am not."

"Yes, you are."

"I AM NOT!" he yelled and rapidly closed the remaining distance between them.

He then grabbed her from the waist and began tickling the young woman to her death. Sakura started squirming and tried to push away the youngster's hands from her sides, but he was much stronger than she was...

"N-no S-syaoran s-stop i-it, STOP IT! she stammered while his fingers continued their merciless task.

"Take it back." he ordered cruelly.

"I-iy-a-da! _Not a chance!_" she refused loudly...

"Then beg me instead..."

"I-I w-will n-never b-beg y-you m-mister!'' Sakura responded stubbornly.

Syaoran smirked devilishly...

"Then you don't leave me any other alternative than this, only remember that it was your choice...'' he replied with equal stubbornness and applied more pressure at the fingers that kept tickling her so pitilessly.

Sakura stubbornly struggled within his powerful seize some more; not wanting to obey to his commands, but soon reluctantly accepted that she had no choice except to obey him…

"P-please S-syaoran s-stop i-it, ONEGAI! _PLEASE!_" Sakura said yelling the last word, finally giving up.

The young man grinned; a triumphal smile appearing on his face and then released her from his powerful grip rather unwillingly the truth is, but Sakura failed to notice his unwillingness.

"Much better.'' he said satisfied and she did nothing else than stucking out her tongue to him before she started catching her breath.

Whilst doing so, she noticed Syaoran was looking at her with a wide beam plastered on his face.

"Why are you smiling?'' she asked curiously.

"It's nothing, really.'' he answered back.

"If it was nothing then you wouldn't be grinning so widely. So what is it?'' she insisted.

"Can you first promise that you won't get angry?''

"Why would I get angry?''

"Promise me first."

"Okay, fine. I promise. Now will you please tell me?''

"It's that you have changed a lot since the day we first met. Back then you were morose, touchy and wouldn't let anyone approach you. But now it seems like you are a different person. You are more optimistic, you trust others much easier and more importantly you laugh and smile. Your face is so much brighter and beautiful than it already is when you grin; I'm so grateful I was blessed to see it..." he admitted and noticed that now she was the one blushing.

For a brief second he thought that she was going to admonish him for speaking thoughtless and pointless words again. He mentally prepared himself for the upcoming outburst, but the young woman was only facing the ground whist the red colour on her cheeks was steadily spreading.

"Um, thank you..." she mumbled under her breath.

"You're not mad?" the young man asked in surprise.

"No, I'm not." she replied and raised her eyes to meet his.

"Yo kata. _I'm glad_." he said smiling.

Sakura remained silent though.

His words gave her great joy, but she couldn't believe him. She knew that the only positive trait she possessed was the colour of her eyes. Luckily she had inherited her mother's eyes, but the young woman didn't think that this single feature made her necessarily a beauty. She shook her head.

There was no hint of logic in his sayings, so there was no possible way that he was serious about this, was there?

Yes, if one thing was certain for Sakura that was her lack of confidence. Syaoran sensed her skepticism.

"You don't think that I'm telling the truth, am I right?" he questioned and stepped forward.

"It's not that I don't want to believe you, but I'm aware of the fact that I'm nothing special..." she said.

The youngster summoned all of his courage and then stepped forward once again, closing bit by bit the small distance that separated the two. Sakura tried to back off instictively, but her feet wouldn't obey her orders. It seemed that they were pinned to the ground.

He searched for her eyes; her wonderful emerald eyes, that were able to hypnotize anyone that looked at them. She was facing the ground again and for some reason she was reluctant to confront his gaze. He used his index and softly lifted her chin making her look straight into his eyes; his wonderful auburn eyes that were able to hypnotize anyone that looked at them.

The distance between them grew smaller and smaller until he was close to her; so close that she could feel his breath warming her face. So close that she could smell his scent clearly; lawn mixed with the aroma of wet soil. The scent that she secretly loved...

Their faces were inches away when he closed his eyes and leaned forward reaching for her lips. Sakura closed her eyes as well and her hands rested on his chest clasping his blouse. His arms wrapped around her waist enclosing her into a secure hug.

They could feel their hearts beating fast, so fast that it was almost certain that they were trying to escape from their chests…

After what seem an eternity to both of them, their lips locked together; her soft ones against his gentle ones. This intimate contact made them both  
shiver, and yet they both felt several waves of warmth engulfing them, bonding them into one…

Sakura had finally found a settler…

She felt secure for the very first time in her entire life…  
She felt that nothing could hurt her anymore…  
She could feel her heart beating even quicker…  
She could feel his chest going up and down while they kissed...  
She could feel herself shivering into his arms…

_His lips were a drug for her…_

Syaoran had found bliss after many years…

He felt complete because he finally had what he needed…  
He felt peaceful just by having her there…  
He could feel his heart trying to escape from his chest…  
He could feel her chest going up and down while they kissed...  
He could feel himself shivering against her…

_Her lips were a drug for him…_

His hold on her became tighter and more urgent as they continued sharing this ultimate evidence of affection. After several minutes that seemed many sunny days to them their lips separated and Syaoran pecked her forehead before pulling entirely away.

"Did that make you feel special?" he asked as soon as they caught their breaths.

"T-that w-was..." she stuttered trying to find the right words to describe what she was feeling.

"That was my honest opinion about you."

"Your opinion was absolutely something else.'' Sakura commented but even so, avoided to make any eye-contact.

Syaoran didn't say anything, but once again used his index to gently lift her chin, making her look straight into his intense eyes. Auburn met emerald and emerald met auburn, but the young woman was still looking somewhat uncertain. A faint darkness he had never seen before was haunting her eyes.

Believing he was the one that caused it, he started to apologize.

"I'm sorry. I value your friendship very much and I honestly don't know what came to me and forced myself on you. I won't blame you if you don't want to see my face in front for you ever again."

Sakura laughed.

"Quit being so dramatic over it, it's not that I disliked it. I was just taken aback that's all..." she admitted and heard him sighing in relief.

Then he remained silent for a while and judging from his expression he was obviously debating about something...

"I know that we know each other for just two months and possibly I'm crossing the line by asking you this, but I would really like you to come with me..."

"Come with you where?"

"To my hometown."

"That sounds great, but what about my family Syaoran? What about okaa-san and otou-san? It's true that we were quarrelling in the past, but lately they've been trying their best to satisfy me. I would be really ungrateful if I leave without any prior thinking; I can't do that to any of us..."

"Of course you can.'' he said teasingly.

"It's not funny Syaoran. Be more reasonable.''

"You're right, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked you something so absurd without any consideration."

"Your request isn't as preposterous as you make it sound."

Syaoran looked at her with skepticism and raised a brow in complete disbelief.

"Okay, okay. It's entirely irrational but in the other hand moving out would be a nice change; I'm an adult after all. I just need some time to think about it carefully before coming to a final decision."

"Do you promise that?''

"I promise.''

"Then I promise that I'll wait for you even if I have to wait for the rest of my life..."

"That was a really sweet thing to say..." the young woman said and saw him blushing.

She laughed; he was so cute when he was flushing like that.

"It's getting late, time for you to go home.'' he said suddenly getting serious.

"Goodnight, Syaoran.'' she said and turned to leave, but not before looking at him one last time.

''Goodnight, Sakura.'' he whispered softly as he watched his little evening star, his reason to live walking away.

When Sakura's figure became less visible on the horizon Syaoran turned away and vanished into thin air with absolutely nothing, not a single clue to signify the fact that a young man was standing there only a few seconds ago…

It was half-past seven and the sun had already set when Sakura finally returned home.

"I'm home!'' she said grinning, but her beam quickly faded as soon as she noticed her father's scolding face…

"Where have you been? We were sick and worried about you!'' Fujitaka scolded his daughter.

"I was with a friend at the park." she responded cautiously.

"And why did it take you so long to come home?''

"Why are you reacting like this? It's not that we were drinking or doing anything illegal of the sort."

"Then why are you so flushed?"

"I'm not flushed! Okaa-san please ratiocinate him..."

"No, Sakura your father is right. You can't just go out for so long and do only Kami-sama knows what. '' Nadesiko responded.

"Why am I being suspected so suddenly? Why don't you believe me when I say I did nothing illicit?" Sakura yelled at them, unintenionally losing her tranquility.

"Don't you dare raise your voice at your mother and me again young lady, we are your parents whether you like it or not; so you better lose that attitude of yours. Now go to your room and reflect your actions.''

"R-reflect my actions? Why am I being treated like a criminal? I didn't do anything suspicious. Last time I checked talking with friends in a public place wasn't a crime."and with these words she ran towards her room, ascending the steps as quickly as she could and slammed the door behind her.

She sprawled on her bed and let all of her sorrow come out. After a while she heard a knock on her door…

"Go away! Leave me alone!'' she said, but much to her disappointment the door opened and her brother entered the room. That's right that bastard of a brother had returned home for the weekend; she had completely forgot about that.

"Sakura-chan, kaa-san says that dinner will be ready in ten minutes.''

"Go away, don't you know what privacy is?''

"I can't leave you like this imouto-chan. What's wrong?''

Sakura snorted in mockery.

"Oh... so now I'm your little sister again?"

"What are you talking about? You were always my sister..."

"Sōna ndesu ka? _Is that so?_ You didn't seem to have the same opinion back then or have you already forgotten? I most certainly haven't. Now get out and tell kaa-san that I'm not hungry; at least not for her food."

Touya sighed, took a last glimpse of his little sister and walked out from the room closing the door behind him…

Sakura got up from the bed and locked her door. Then she sat at her desk, took her diary from the drawer and began unbinding the trail of her confused thoughts …

**November 15th 2009**

**My dear diary,  
can you possibly imagine what happened today?**

** I was supposed to meet with Syaoran this afternoon at the park and I was really looking forward to it.  
Yeah, having a friend to talk to is undeniably so great... **

**Anyway, I arrived at our usual spot and I found him humming an unfamiliar to me song. He was chanting in a bizarre language and I couldn't comprehend the meaning of the lyrics. His tone was so melancholic and depressing; he seemed to be in so much pain. I felt so sorry about him... **

**He denied it though when I asked him about it and he told me that he didn't want me to think of him as a weak person.  
Sometimes I honestly don't get him. How could I think such a ridiculous thing about him?**

** Anyhow, we sat under Old-oak and decided to start calling each other by our first names.  
I'm so happy that he allowed me to call him Syaoran. **

**I feel that now we are much closer.**

** Then I noticed that he was grinning and it triggered my curiosity.  
He said that I've changed a lot since the first time we met.  
He said that now I laugh more and that my face is more beautiful than it already is.  
He then kissed me to prove me that I'm special.**

**It was my first kiss since that time and it really felt so different; now it was so overwhelming and breathtaking.  
I can't explain why, but I'm glad that Syaoran was the one to erase the previous experience... **

**But afterwards he started exaggerating about me not wanting to face him again because of what he did. **

**I laughed at his overreaction, but I like the fact he possesses sense of responsibility... **

**And then he asked me to follow him to his hometown.  
Leaving from this house and starting a new life of independence isn't such a bad idea, but I have to also think about okaa-san and otou-san. **

**We finally started getting along, but tonight otou-san started interrogating me as if I was a criminal and when I asked okaa-san to help me, she just backed him up. **

**Honestly I don't know what to do... **

**On the one hand is Syaoran and on the other is my family. **

**Syaoran is sweet, caring and honest with me.  
He has also weaknesses and after seeing his weak side I think that we can comfort each other. I feel that I can really depend on him. **

**On the other hand there are okaa-san and otou-san who have been ignoring me the last nineteen years, but lately they have been trying their best to rectify for their past actions.  
However, I didn't like the way otou-san interrogated me as if I was a criminal and moreover the fact that okaa-san backed him up. **

**Does this mean that they don't trust me? **

**I have a really terrible feeling about this...**

**Sakura**

**P.S How did I get into this? **

The young woman closed her diary and lay on her bed without bothering to remove her clothes. She curled onto the sheets and sighed.

Her hand absentmindedly flew to her mouth and the delicate fingers touched her lips. She thought of Syaoran and their kiss.

Her heart skipped a beat...

_'Why am I feeling like this?'_ she thought confused and heard her conscience chuckling knowingly.

Sakura grunted something incoherent about its intrusive tendency and shifted her weight on the bed. Her eyelids became heavier and soon sleep welcomed her in to its warm embrace...

* * *

**Author's Note: **I'm so sorry for the long wait. I hope you enoyed reading...

**Poems:**

**Meaning:**

_You have fallen.  
And I cannot reach you.  
Every step I willed you on,  
Every moment I lead you to this.  
You never left my mind,  
Not once, not ever. _

_In a dream I was lifted up.  
Borne from the darkness  
Above the rivers of fire.  
On wings soft as the wind.  
What's happened to the world?  
Is everything sad going to come untrue? _


	5. 4:The Decision

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura in any way, CLAMP does. I do own the plotline of this story though...

**WARNING!: **The rating went up, so if you're underaged or easily offended please don't read the _italics._ Also Touya remains the bad guy of this story. Touya fans out there don't skin me alive, I needed a villain and he was perfect for the role, at least from my perspective...

* * *

**Chapter 4:**

**The Decision**

_To be able to pace forward without looking back._**  
That is the meaning of one's true strength...**

_The night that Sakura's childhood was tainted, Fujitaka and Nadesiko were absent.  
That certain night was their marriage anniversary and they had decided to celebrate themselves at a local restaurant leaving a fifteen year old Touya responsible for both Sakura and their house._

_The clock in Sakura's room was ticking past eleven and the schoolgirl was sleeping soundlessly on her comfortable bed until the door opened slowly with a low creaking sound __and the young man entered the bedroom__. The girl woke up as soon as she felt her bed sinking due to Touya's weight as he was sitting beside her. _

_She sat up and faced her older brother through sleepy eyes. He was emitting a peculiar aura, but at that time the little girl trusted him as much as she trusted her own shadow so she disregarded the bad feeling that she sensed due to his presence. _

"_Hey imouto-chan…"__ he whispered as he placed his palm on her smooth cheek and started caressing it. _

"_Onii-chan __dō shita no?_ _Big brother what's wrong? Naze anata wa koko ni iru no ka? Why are you here?'' she muttered worriedly._

"_Kore wa nani mo nai__.__ It's nothing. Everything is alright. I just wanted to check on you."_

"_Are tou-san and kaa-san here yet?"_

"_No, but they have already told me that they'll be back before midnight which means that I have little time to finish with this, but the prospect of being caught into the act really excites me..." he whispered with a husky voice and the girl saw that his eyes were staring at her with a bizarre darkness. _

_A darkness that always shadowed his gaze when she was present; a darkness that she constantly failed to notice due to the unlimited reliance that she held for her older brother. His darkened gaze was loaded with a corrupt feeling of forbidden and revolting craving; an immoral desire of his sister's innocence..._

_Sakura arched her head to the side not comprehending wholly the meaning behind his extraordinary words, but alas the little girl was going to find out very soon..._

"_What do you mean __onii-chan__?" the girl asked with the obvious curiosity of an eleven year old child._

_However, instead of answering Touya shoved his sister ferociously back to her bed and without wasting any time straddled her, trapping the girl beneath him .  
She vainly tried to push him off, but her brother was very heavy and didn't budge an inch. He growled with annoyance and fiercely slapped her across the face leaving the deep red handprint along with the intense sting to remind her who was in control of the situation. He smirked cruelly at his little sister and then restrained her wrists into one of his hands.  
_

_After that he leaned in and his corrupted tongue began trailing the side of her neck forming a wet path of saliva. _

_Terror began travelling trough Sakura's veins and the little girl started trembling. _

"_Onii-chan yameru, onegai. Big brother quit it__, please. I don't like this." she pleaded sobbing, but was immediately silenced by Touya's aggressive lips which shamelessly began devouring hers... _

_His hand sneaked underneath the top of her pajamas and his fingertips leisurely started caressing the skin beneath. _

_Soon he decided that the garment was in his way and so he removed it slowly, exposing bit by bit his sister's upper body to his wicked eyes. Having taken in the sight that the poor girl so unwillingly provided him, he shifted the centre of his attention to her tiny breasts and took one into his mouth.  
_

_He firstly nibbled the sensitive skin making sure to leave a mark and then started sucking as hard as he could, while his free hand grabbed her other breast tightly and started kneading it._

_The little girl winced in pain and tears were shortly trickling from her eyes. _

"_O-onii-chan y-yameru._ _B-big brother q-quit it_._ I-I'm b-begging y-you..." she sobbed, but her cries and pleas fell into deaf ears. _

_Touya released his sister's breast from his mouth, but not before nibbling the skin again making sure to create another purplish mark on it. Then his free hand squezzed firmly her other breast and after that released one of her restrained hands. He clasped the small wrist firmly and then guided her hand towards his crotch. _

_To Sakura's terror he applied her palm onto his manhood. She tried to wrench her hand away from the item, but his grasp became stronger and his nails dag into her skin. Sakura flinched in pain and soon realized that the item beneath her fingers was swollen and moreover throbbing against her palm._

"_Can you feel that? Onii-chan wants you so bad..." he whispered and restrained her hand with the one that was still being held captive above her head once again._

_Nevertheless this nightmare was sadly nowhere near its end and before she could register what was happening he started frantically rubbing his crotch against her._

"_Y-yameru. Quit it..." she pleaded once more but he did nothing else than harshly silence her by consuming her lips with his own. His tongue emerged yet again and forced its way inside her mouth._

_The girl was laying there helpless and numb; a puppet bound to her older brother's mercy._

_ She begged Kami-sama to make her brother stop his heartless assault on her, but her prayers weren't __impetrated…_

_Tears were falling endlessly from her puffy eyes and she could do nothing else but close her eyes and hope that this was a bad dream; an incubus that would inevitably come to an end as soon as she woke up. But sadly, this wasn't only an awful dream._

_ This was really happening and she had no power to make it stop. _

_Primitive sounds were now escaping from his throat. Sounds that made her tremble entirely horror-stricken unable to do anything else than desperately wishing for this nightmare to come to an end soon. _

_And whilst she was wishing so, the little girl was able to feel the item between his legs growing harder and harder … _

"YAMERU! _QUIT IT!_ " a deafening shout pierced the silence of the night in the Kinomoto household.

Its orientation was Sakura's room that was now sitting fully awake on her bed.

The young woman was sweaty and a few tears were moistening her rosy cheeks. It took her a few minutes to realize that she was behind the security of the locked door that shielded her from the rest of the house and the dangers that were lurking within.

She was in her bedroom, the very same room where that bastard tried to rape her eight years ago.

Fortunately he didn't succeed into snatching her innocence because Fujitaka and Nadesiko had returned in the nick of time. Nevertheless, he managed to rape her spirit and crush every speck of the young woman's self-esteem...

From that night and up until this day she had been locking her door in order to protect herself from another potential assault.

Irony was that neither of their parents was aware of that incident even after all these years. Sakura hadn't dared to tell them knowing that Touya was their favorite only son and a well mannered young man who was unable to hurt a fly and much more so, his own sister…

The young woman was persuaded that they weren't going to believe in her words due to the fact that neither of them was eager to accept as true something which wrecked the image of their perfect son. It was too painful to admit, but the main reason was that she was scared of their reaction.

She didn't want to be attained and pretending that nothing was wrong was enabling her to imagine that this despising experience never occurred.

And so she had kept quiet all these years although this hidden secret; this hidden truth was tormenting her insides.

Ever since that night this particular nightmare haunted her dreams regularly, disturbing her sleeping and making her anguish even more.

Sakura wiped the tears from her eyes and lay back to bed struggling to get asleep again.

She was willing to give anything for a peaceful night; even her own soul...

There was light within the darkness though; a light that was carved into the shape of a certain suggestion that was grating her mind since that afternoon and Sakura was about to go after it.

As soon as the young woman woke up the next morning she knew exactly which path she was going to follow. She got up from the bed with drowsy movements and bore due the bathroom with sluggish footsteps. After splashing some water on her face she looked at the round mirror that was hanging on the wall and saw her reflection returning the gaze through red eyes.

The young woman sighed.

The last two weeks she had been able to sleep serenely without any incubuses disturbing her dreams, but last night the nightmare appeared once more. The fact which troubled her most was that the memory of the incident this time was more vivid and detailed than it had been in the past. Sakura had an odd feeling about this. A feeling which she could not utterly comprehend and accurately describe, but it was somewhat like a premonition.

A sort of grand and excelsior mightiness that was sleeping within her, which sole purpose was to warn and protect the young woman from a gradually approaching menace...

At that moment she recalled the lyrics of a poem that she came across once while reading a novel.

_**I stand here, yet no one can see me.  
My heart is bleeding.  
I cry for help, yet no one can hear me.**_

_**I'm nothing.**_

_**I'm just a shadow passing by.  
I pray for help but no one can save me.**_

_**I'm nothing. **_

_**I'm just a shadow falling in the darkness...**_

She and the heroine of that book were so much alike.

Their existence was overlooked by family members. Both of them had experienced the cruelty of this world and both of them had been crawling within musk. The only difference between them was that there was a trace of light in front of Sakura's path; an opportunity of escaping from this prison and heading towards this bright light which led to a new and promising world of hope.

The one and only issue was whether she was going to let this alternative chance go to waste or not...

She sighed once more and glanced at the mirror. Her reflection looked back at her with a determined expression and at this point the young woman settled on a choice. With glissade steps Sakura walked out of the bathroom and moved towards the locked door.

Once the unlocking sound was heard, the young woman took a deep breath to gain some courage and then with steady and certain steps she started descending the staircase ready to face whatever awaited her in the kitchen.

However, as soon as she reached the bottom stair and the sounds coming from the particular room were audible to some extent her confidence fell apart in just few seconds and an overpowering knot formed inside her throat and chest.

The young woman froze at that spot wavering, debating whether she should turn back and leave without notifying or not. She heard her conscience mumbling exasperated by her indecisiveness and Sakura sighed admitting that just for this once, it had every right to be mad at her.

She swallowed and after summoning some of her prior bravery stepped into the sitting-room and from there headed towards the kitchen. Each step that she took was heavier than the previous and for a reason Sakura felt as if she was walking unto her death warrant.

Her conscience snorted mockingly and she knew that it was once again right for making fun of her...

However as she was getting closer to the kitchen the sounds were even more audible and as she realized they weren't just random noises.

They actually were moans of pleasure which originated from two familiar voices.

The young woman finally reached the doorway and froze with shock because of the sight she witnessed.

In front of her eyes was her brother along with his best friend Tsukishiro Yukito interacting in a rather intimate manner. The grey haired male was sited literally on the table with his shirt half-buttoned and his head arched backwards. His fingers were fisting the other's hair pulling him even closer and Touya was bent over him and currently sucking the crook of his partner's neck.

A gasp of surprise escaped from her lips notifying the two males about her presence.

Yukito was clearly more embarrassed and with a blush creeping on his cheeks he tried to push the other male away...

"Y-yamero T-Touya. _Stop Touya,_ S-Sakura-c-chan i-is h-here." he said panting, but said person didn't bother to budge an inch.

"Don't worry about her; Sakura is a big girl now and I'm sure she knows quite well what making out is..." the black haired male responded nonchalantly and nipped forcefully the other's shoulder.

"TOUYA!" the other male screamed at the top of his lungs as his partner's teeth scraped the sensitive skin.

Sakura blushed and didn't wait to witness more, but turned around and ran back to her room; the disturbing sounds still echoing in her ears.

Once in her bedroom and behind the safety of the locked door she registered the activity which was most likely still taking place downstairs and then...

Merely burst into laughing.

Yes it was startling to get a glimpse of her brother's intimate moments, but she wasn't going to deny that it was also kind of amusing.

_'It's not that I didn't see this coming.'_ she thought and giggled.

The young woman had a crush on Yukito-san for several years; even after that occurrence happened.

Little Sakura always believed that this male was destined to mend her smashed spirit and wounded heart...

Nevertheless, as the little girl was growing into a teenager it became more and more noticeable that her crush and that brother of hers were fairly intimate with each other; closer than normal to be precise. She began suspecting that something was going on between them as soon as she turned fifteen.

One day she happened to pass outside from Touya's room and heard muffled sounds coming from inside. Sakura remembered that she had crept at his door and eavesdropped; the sounds that they were making were exactly same to the ones she heard today.

The young woman had given up her crush as soon as she saw them exiting from her brother's room with identical blissful expressions drawn on their faces.

_'His happiness is as well my happiness__...__'  
_

That's what she had thought and believed till this day.

And apparently Yukito-san was more than content with Touya as his partner and ruining his happiness was the last thing that she wished for; even if the one at his side was the person who had deprived her from her dignity.

All these years Sakura didn't develop any special feelings for another male; until Syaoran appeared in her life.

A warm sensation emitted from the bottom of her heart each time she was near or thought about him; a feeling that she didn't fully understand but even so was more than eager to figure out...

Later on that day the young woman packed some essential belongings that would surely be needed.

As she was staring her practically stuffed suitcase Sakura felt remorse for not having enough space for all of her valued novels.

She sighed and seeing that there was room for only one book Sakura chose her most favorite one; Rae Mei Ling's very first work. It was the story of a young girl named Shiori that had gone through several hardships and faced the nastiness of this world. Yet she had the optimism and determination to cope with each day and whatever it brought to her thinking that someday happiness will definitely arrive at her life as well.

It was published several years ago and its title was_ 'The life I'm living...'_

She looked at the rest of the books that seemed to return her gaze with a plaintive expression and sincerely apologized for not being able to take them with her; strange as it may be Sakura felt that they were creatures with feelings of their own.

Yes, the one thing that she was going to miss greatly for sure was her cherished novels.

Sakura sighed again and her gaze shifted to her desk. A blank sheet of paper was laid there waiting for her to gather the words in an attempt to express her last thoughts. Words of farewell and thoughts of strong bitterness and acute grief.

And when finally her hand began writing, every sour thought and every disheartening emotion that she was undergoing but nevertheless concealing all these years came into the surface. Everything that was bringing misery to her; everything that she was leaving behind.

_**Otou-san, okaa-san,**_

_**from the time I can remember myself Touya was the one who received your entire attention. **_

_**For several years I was struggling to make you notice that I'm also alive.  
But no matter what I did and no matter how hard I was trying everything was trivial and worthless compared to your son's great achievements.  
**_

_**So I learnt to live in solitude and depend on no one.  
Obscuring my feelings and pretending that I didn't care was effective seeing that you never noticed that I was in pain...**_

_**I became accustomed of my loneliness and everything was fine until recently.  
**_

_**You suddenly wanted to be part of my life and that thought scared me.  
I never dared to dream of the possibility of having you at my side, but nonetheless I decided to take the risk.  
**_

_**I really regret that decision of mine. **_

_**I would be lying if I claimed that I didn't enjoy the time we were able to spend together.  
However, your interrogation last night made me think that perhaps in your eyes I'm still a child that needs protection.  
**_

_**I stopped being a little girl eight years ago.  
You would be able to notice that if you paid some attention in your daughter's life. **_

_**Now it's too late. **_

_**You can't protect me anymore and if you're not willing to trust me I guess that this is our farewell...  
**_

_**It was a difficult decision for me to take, but due to some certain occurrences of the past I'm moving out at a friend's.  
I believe that this is for the best since there's nothing more left for me here than pain and sorrow.  
I don't want to be at the bottom any longer so I'm heading towards a fresh start and hopefully the top as well.**_

_**Wish me luck...**_

_**Sakura**_

At some point the young woman's hand stopped writing and Sakura read unhurriedly the words that were scribed on the paper. When her eyes fell on the last sentence a small grin of satisfaction formed on her lips. At last she was able to express the inner feelings and thoughts that were piling up within her system about their unfair behavior towards her.

Sakura sighed with contentment and a heavy weight was lifted from her shoulders.

She was at last free; free to think, say and do whatever she wanted and for that simple reason she didn't regret her decision the slightest...

It was now time to find Syaoran and follow the promising path that he was leading. A path that would surely guide her towards the light that was shining brightly ahead of her...

* * *

**Author's Note: **I'm so, so, so, so,..., so terribly sorry for the late update. There's no excuse that can justify me and I won't blame you if you stop reading this. I hope that this chapter even though short was worth the wait...


	6. 5:Departing and Arriving At Valleria

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura in any way, CLAMP does. I do own though the plotline of this story though...

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the poem Aníron. It belongs to its rightful owner who is no one else than Tolkien...

* * *

**Chapter 5:**

**Departing and Arriving at Valleria**

_To be able to embrace whatever awaits you..._

**That is the meaning of one's true strength...**

The time to find Syaoran and traverse alongside this promising path towards the light was finally here. The way to arrive there was adventurous and unexplored; a mysterious pathway that she was on the verge of crossing.

Perhaps Sakura was pacing towards another calamity, but as long as Syaoran was beside her everything would definitely turn out well; she was convinced about it...

'The time has finally come; the time to leave every bad memory in the past and stride forward without any hint of fear or doubt. From now on everything will undeniably be alright because at last I'm not alone.'

These were the young woman's thoughts as she was stepping from the front door of her ex-house for the final time.

Sakura had never before felt pride regarding any decision of hers, but for the very first time in her entire life this foreign emotion was spreading rapidly through her veins and soon her system was overwhelmed by it. The young woman closed her eyes and inhaled the air around her without any restraint.

Sakura thought of herself as a caged bird which was just set free from its prison and was about to spread its wings and fly excitedly towards the horizon. She smiled at the idea and then started walking down the street with confident steps. However, instead of heading immediately at the park and Syaoran she decided to stroll around Tomoeda for one last time; after all it was her last day here and she highly doubted the possibility of returning here.  
At least not if she could do something to prevent such unthinkable and preposterous prospect...

Firstly, she made her way at the Penguin Park the most famous playground in whole Tomoeda. Truth to be told, Sakura hadn't spent much time in this place as a child.  
But the playground along with the swings, the merry-go-round and the chutes looked so appealing and therefore the young woman couldn't walk by the place without even sparing it a glance. Sakura looked at the little children which were playing and running around cheerfully.

Blissful smiles were drawn on their overjoyed faces and while she was observing them an identical beam drawn on her lips too. Their voices and laughs were so welcoming that for a second the young woman was tempted to join their games and most probably she would have done so hadn't a scoff coming from her conscience stopped her intentions.  
Sakura groaned in displease; she really hated her conscience when it meddled like that and despised it even more when it had such influence in what concerned her decisions...

Nevertheless, she sighed and obliged to its orders.

Next she visited the location of her former school. The young woman didn't have many memories with friends in this place, but she had spent twelve years of her life there. Someone could say that it was a second home to not only her, but every other student as well.

It was an extensive area that entailed a complex of three separate and autonomous buildings; one at the centre, one at the left and one at the right. The building at the centre was the Elementary School, the one at the left was the Junior High and the one at the right was the High School. The whole facility was known as Seijou School for boys and girls. Sakura looked towards the courtyard that embosomed the institution. Cherry blossoms and ginkgo trees were spread within the fore-yard welcoming the students as soon as they entered and parterres with yellow and red pansies as well as mauve violets could be seen all around the entire establishment. Everything was as she remembered it.

It'd only been a few months since the day that she graduated, but being here again was so nostalgic...

She also thought of visiting Maki's toy shop. The owner was always sweet and kind to everyone and Sakura recalled spending hours of staring and admiring the marvels of the window shop. There was a time, when she was still a fourth grader, that the girls of her age were visiting regularly the store to buy some special cards which were supposed to have the ability to improve your performance in almost everything; school, sports, cooking, sewing and even love affairs.

Even she had been tempted to buy the card of Love wanting it to help her get closer to Yukito-san. At the certain recollection a low laugh escaped from her throat and she decided that it was now time to head at the park.

And thus the young woman began walking towards this specific location where she was positive that Syaoran would be waiting as promised. As soon as the thought of him invaded her mind the warm sensation engulfed her and a small grin shaped on her lips. The young woman very soon grew impatient and therefore quickened her pace.

And then unable to hold back, Sakura started running as fast as possible ignoring the disapproving stares that she was receiving from the onlookers, but she couldn't care less. Meeting Syaoran was far more important than worrying about what others thought about her...

Meanwhile, the young elf was indeed at the park waiting patiently for her to arrive. His thoughts drifted at the events of the day before today and a grin formed on his lips.  
He was grateful that Sakura wasn't angry with him for kissing her so suddenly, but there was something in that uncertain expression of hers which was troubling him; something disturbing, something that shadowed her emerald eyes.  
Maybe it would be wiser for the both of them not to rush and let things unfold by themselves.

Yes, that was a better alternative because scaring her away was the last thing that he desired…

Syaoran closed his eyes and sighed. Thoughts of Sakura invaded his mind and a grin curved his lips again. He started humming but this time his mantra wasn't very cheerless.

**_"O môr henion i dhû:_**  
**_Ely siriar, êl síla._**  
**_Ai! Aníron Undomiel…_**

**_Tiro! Él eria e môr._**  
**_I 'lîr en êl luitha 'úren._**  
**_Ai! _****_Aníron..."_**

The young woman arrived at the park the moment he began chanting. She smiled and after closing her eyes enjoyed the melody of his song. He was performing in that unusual and yet so enchanting foreign language of his again, but his tune now was more joyful. Sakura was pleased to notice that…

In a little while the tone of his deep voice faded and both of them slowly opened their eyes. As soon as he registered her presence, Sakura tossed her suitcase and threw herself into his arms. Syaoran grinned at her childish reaction and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"You have a really nice voice, hearing you performing comforts me…"

He sighed; so she heard him again. It wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but he was rather embarrassed of what she may think of him.

It was common for males of his people to sing in order to express their feelings, but he wasn't aware of the customs of this country and subsequently Sakura might be thinking that his habits were peculiar or even abnormal. Nonetheless, his thoughts were interrupted.

"I'm glad that you're alright." she said and the elf looked at her through confused eyes.

"Your song; it wasn't mournful this time." the young woman explained.

"I blame it on you..." was his response.

Sakura laughed because of his statement before replying.

"Then I'm glad that I have positive influence on you."

Syaoran chuckled and remained silent for a while before talking again. The moment he did, his voice was nervous and his eyes were glimmering with uncertainty about the outcome of his upcoming question. Nevertheless, he summoned all of his gallantry and verbalized the one and only query which was hovering within his mind from the minute they met again…

"Nē Sakura, I know that it's only been one day since yesterday, but have you given any thought at my suggestion? "

Sakura nodded before replying.

"Hai, I did and I reached to a decision." she said and before she could continue her sentence Syaoran interrupted.

"Before you say more, I want you to know that you're not obliged to follow me if you don't truly desire it. I would never dare to force you into doing something that you dislike."

"It's really nice to see that you're being honest and considerate Syaoran and I'm honestly thankful for that. However, I have already made my mind and my decision is to come with you."

"Are you entirely sure about that?"

"I wouldn't be here carrying a suitcase if I wasn't confident about my choice." the young woman said grinning, but despite her wide beam the elf was able to distinguish a faint trace of darkness that was clouding her eyes.

"Is anything troubling you Sakura?" he asked concerned.

"Of course not, why are you asking this so suddenly?" she denied bottling up her inner emotions, but the elf wasn't fooled by her lie.

He shook his head and a depressed smile was drawn on his face.

"There's a dim hint of darkness in your eyes. You told me that lying about something that bothers us is more painful for the others. Therefore please don't lie, it hurts me so bad." he said with a low voice and then embraced her as tightly as he could.

Sakura found herself enclosed in his arms and before she could prevent the tears from falling, moisture slowly started flowing down her face. And yet, an unknown sensation of security was awakened within her as well. The young woman raised her head a little bit and looked at him through teary eyes. His expression was compassionate and his eyes were silently begging her to entrust her qualms to him.

And Sakura considered of letting everything go from within her and entirely opening her heart to him, but a sudden wave of absolute terror about his reaction prevented her from doing so. The thought of losing Syaoran's friendship and above all Syaoran himself was once more inexplicably unbearable. No; she couldn't afford losing him.

"I don't want to lose you." was all that she said as the tears kept dripping from her eyes endlessly. The young elf slowly raised his hand and carefully wiped her tears away and after that caressed her cheek tenderly. His touch was once again a soft stroke of comfort for the young woman.

"I will never leave from your side, you're not alone anymore Sakura." he said with low voice and tightened his hold on her.

"Arigatō. _Thank you..._" she replied and felt her tears stop trickling.

"Īe. _No;_ you're always the one who comforts me. Now it's my turn to do the same for you. So please from now on trust me and never cry again because a smile suits you much better..." Syaoran stated and without any prior thinking and before he could stop himself kissed her forehead.

His gentle words infested her with gratitude, his soft kiss with utmost glee and for the the millionth time since their first meeting Sakura smiled. His presence was consoling and his words heart-warming.

The young woman thought that his ability to calm and comfort her within seconds was remarkable and she was thankful for that skill of his. For the first time in her entire life being with someone was enjoyable and provided her with an alien emotion of safety and given that Syaoran was the one at her side Sakura was feeling even more protected; like nothing in the world would be able to hurt her any longer. His voice invaded into her ears and she was brought back to reality.

"If you're completely sure about this, I think we should go."

Sakura nodded in agreement.

"Hai, just let me say goodbye to Old-oak first."

He nodded and watched her as she was now approaching the massive tree. The young woman reached out and placed her palm against the trunk.

"Sayonara. _Goodbye_, Old-oak. Thank you for being here and for always listening to me. I will never forget you..."

Having bid her farewell to the tree Sakura turned around to face Syaoran whilst a melancholic expression was shadowing her features.

"Machigatte iru Sakura wa nanidesu ka?_ Is anything wrong Sakura?_ Anata wa daijōbudesu ka? _Are you alright?_"

"Sore wa nani mo nai._ It's nothing_. Watashi wa daijōbuda yo. _I'm alright._ Watashi wa chōdo yo. _I'm just._.."

"Anata dake no ne? _You just?_"

"I'm just going to miss everything in this place so much…"

The young man smiled with consideration and tried to lighten her downhearted mood.

"Everything is going to be alright. There are many places akin to this in my hometown. I was planning to keep it as a surprise and let you see it yourself, but my house is near a forest. I'm sure that you'll like it there Sakura…"

His words managed yet again to reassure her uneasiness and the young woman looked at him with hopeful eyes.

"Hontōni? _Really?_"

"Hontōni hontō._ Really really_."

"Yakusoku?_ Promise?_"

"Yakousokuda yo. _It's a promise..."_

"Jya, ikimasu._ Then, let's go.._."

"Hai, hai. _Yes, yes..._" he said and wrapped his arm around her waist. Sakura sent him a confused look and before she could ask any kind of query the elf explained.

"We are going to cross dimensions."

"Is that the name of a new-found airline service?" she asked with curiosity and the elf laughed.

"No Sakura. We are literally going to cross dimensions…"

"Hoe? You surely jest, how can it be possible?"

"Everything is possible in this world. Now hold on tight…"

The young woman was half-convinced by his unsatisfying explanation, but even so did as she was told. Syaoran without wasting any precious time closed his eyes and whispered some sort of incantation in that bizarre language of his.

"Ando Eldarinwa a lasta quettanya; edro hi ammen! _Gate of the Elves listen to my word; open now for me!_"

And suddenly his chant caused the air that surrounded them to form ripples and a large gap which strangely enough was similar to a closed gate materialized in front of them.  
As he was leading them nearer to the opening, the door panels began opening slowly revealing colorful sceneries to them. Sakura's eyes widened in surprise but when she glanced at Syaoran she noted that he was calm as if nothing had happened.

"You trust me?"

"I trust you." she replied and the young man grinned whilst leading the both of them through the black hole.

Within a blink both of them disappeared leaving behind them a suitcase that kept laying there forgotten as the sole proof to indicate that someone was standing there a few moments ago. The colourful sceneries started decomposing only to be composed again right in front of their eyes within seconds. Every colour was blending with the others in order to create an abstract painting…

Sakura realized that her eyesight was becoming blurry and felt her insides spinning uncontrollably. She closed her eyes in a desperate attempt to prevent the feeling of nausea from spreading further. And suddenly everything came to a halt as rapidly and unexpectedly as it had started.

Nonetheless, the young woman kept her eyes completely shut unsure of her eagerness to face the new place that awaited for her.

''Nē, Sakura? You can let go now, we're here…'' Syaorans' deep voice spoke, but she clutched tighter on his shirt and refused stubbornly to let go of his safe embrace or open her eyes.

All of her prior determination and courageousness were shattered in a matter of seconds and now she watched herself standing there quivering due to an abrupt wave of nervousness.

"Iya da._ No way_, I don't want to." she said stubbornly and shook her head to emphasize her denial.

"Open your eyes. I promise that you'll like what you'll see..." he insisted and his hands clasped hers reassuringly.

"Yakusoku? _Promise?_"

''Yakusokuda yo. _It's a promise.._."

Sakura nodded and rather reluctantly opened one eye and then the other slowly and at the same time let go of his shirt. However, the sight that she witnessed was far from her wildest dreams.

All the fantasy novels that described mythical places were nowhere near the brilliance and beauty of this location. Not even Elkon himself was ever able to imagine and write of such magnificence and he was the best of the best novelists, so that meant something; at least for Sakura did.

Right in front of her eyes were constructed massive stone walls that surrounded the most marvelous town she had ever seen. It was built into eight separate levels which connected with each other by means of several huge cobble sets of steps. An autonomous level which held a great number of cherry blossoms sprouted within its extent was also located at the bottom. It was a spacious area of gathering for the inhabitants which was named Agora.

At each level was established a sum of ten or in some cases twelve residences. Every residence was made from stone and consisted of two stories, a wooden triangle shaped roof and a balcony which was decorated by bunches of a certain blossom. It was silver and despite its colour it was similar to a lily.

Finally at the eighth and last level was developing a forest of majestic golden leaved trees and amongst the thick trunks as Sakura noted was evident the top of a noble residence.  
Its construction was similar to the rest, but this one was evidently bigger and an aura of supremacy radiated from there. In addition to that, it viewed not only the forest, but the whole town as well.

The young woman stood there amazed taking in the gorgeousness of the location. She was at a loss of words because no word could describe its exquisiteness. Not even in her craziest fantasies had she ever thought of such a wonderful and fairytale-like place. Being able to live at such a heavenly site was a miracle and Sakura thought that Syaoran was blessed of having been born here.

"Welcome to Valleria. This is my hometown Estelle." his voice spoke from somewhere beside her, but she was too amazed to notice him speaking. The young man merely grinned and shook a hand in front of Sakura's astonished eyes. As soon as he got her attention Syaoran talked again.

"So, can I safely assume that you like it here?"

The young woman opened her mouth to respond, but found no words to speak so she just nodded quite excitedly.

"Welcome to Valleria. This is my hometown Estelle." he repeated and after taking her by the hand he led them past the stone walls.

Once inside the city Sakura noted that the dress code of the fellow inhabitants was alike. All males wore dark-fired tops and black or pure white pants and the females were dressed in elegant frocks. Their hairstyles were sophisticated and matched the gracefulness of their outfits. And suddenly the young woman felt that she was out of place; that her presence there was an offence to everyone.

She wrinkled at Syaoran's side and looked at the gathered crowd scared of what they might be thinking about her.

However, no one seemed to be insulted by her being there and much to her surprise people were bowing as Syaoran was leading their way towards the enormous stairs.  
They began ascending them and the young elf bowed in return at a pair of elders that was on their way down and stopped as soon as they saw their leader going up. Sakura mimicked Syaoran's action and the two seniors grinned in acknowledgement.

After that both pairs continued on their opposite directions. Not long after they began walking again Sakura's curiosity kicked in.

"Nē, Syaoran?"

"Sore wa nanidesu ka? _What is it?_"

"Why are these people bowing at you?"

"They are simply acknowledging our presence."

"Yes, but why are they bowing?"

"It's because I'm their leader. I once told you about that, don't you remember?"

"To be honest I thought that you were just fooling around."

"You didn't believe me?" he asked and Sakura saw his frown changing to an upset expression.

"It's not that I don't want to believe you, but frankly speaking, you don't seem much older than me. Thus, the thought of being a leader at such a young age is incredible, at least for me."

"Trust me, I may not look like it, but I'm way older than you."

Sakura stared him through dubious eyes.

"Right...and I'm the Queen of England."

"Nice meeting you majesty..."

"Syaoran! Can't you be serious for a while?"

"I am serious. It's not my fault that you don't believe me." he said and pouted.

The young woman merely rolled her eyes and followed him as they kept walking whilst silence fell upon them. His words although absurd and unbelievable were grating the gears in Sakura's mind and caused her curiosity to butt in once more.

"Nē Syaoran, are you really serious about this?"

The young man halted and turned around to face her; his facial expression was the most solemn she had witnessed so far.

"Have you ever heard about the Eldars?"

"Eldars? Oh, you mean elves. Of course I have. They are described as fairest and also wisest of all living beings and in addition to that are blessed with immortality. Furthermore, elves are known about their pointy ears, but nevertheless as much disappointing as it is, their existence is purely fictional." she replied with the expertness and accuracy of someone who has read plenty of books and smiled to herself proud of her knowledge.

Yes; she hadn't read so many novels simply to kill her time.

Syaoran laughed bitterly and shook his head.  
At that instant Sakura noticed that the shape of his ears was different than before. The normal round shape was no longer existent. Instead, it had been replaced by a slightly pointed at the top of each ear edge.

The young woman pointed at him dumbfounded and tried to talk, but no words came past her lips. He looked at her confused, but then realized the reason of her astonishment.

"Oh, these?" he asked casually and pointed at his ears. Sakura nodded and the elf slightly grinned before explaining.

"Some of us are born with the gift of esgal. It is basically an ability that enables the altering of the true nature of our ears. This is the main reason that humans are led to believe that our existence is only a myth."

Sakura shook her head in disbelief.

"You want me to believe that these are real?" she queried and pointed at his ears.

"Whether you believe me or not is up to you, but I'll tell you one thing that chichi-ue used to tell me:_ 'You can't see something, but this does not necessarily mean that it does not exist'_..."

Sakura angled her head to the side, not fully understanding what he was trying to tell her. The elf sighed and explained further.

"The air for instance; you can't see it, but it blows the leaves on the trees. The cold as well; you can't see it, but it makes you tremble during nights. Hence, don't be quick to judge what exists and what doesn't because you'll definitely be surprised."

"But wanting me to believe that elves really exist is in every respect different with the existence of the air and the cold. Yes I can't see either of them, but as you said I _can feel them.**"**_

Syaoran shook his head again.

"I already told you; whether you believe me or not is up to you. I'm not going to force you into believing something that seems so preposterous to you, but on one last note, think of how I was able to bring us here."

The young woman opened her mouth to argue, but found no words to logically explain his ability to cross dimensions. Thus, she simply nodded and then added hesitantly.

"C-can I touch them?" she questioned and saw Syaoran blushing crimson for some unknown to her reason, but before she could ask why he was reacting like that the elf answered her unspoken query.

"To touch someone's ears for us is considered as an action of affection between couples." he explained in a low voice almost whispering the words as if it was something prohibited to talk about.

The young woman faltered for a while, but then spoke yet again while her cheeks were growing scarlet as well; she didn't understand why she was flushing though.

"I still want to touch them, is that okay with you?"

The elf slowly nodded and both of them held their breaths as soon as Sakura's hand reached out and her fingers moved towards his ear. And then, after a few seconds that seemed ages to the both of them, the delicate limps met with their destination.

It was only a simple and meaningless gesture, but she couldn't prevent the crimson colour from spreading further on her cheeks; nor was she able to stop her heart from racing when she heard him taking in a sharp breath the moment her fingers timidly began trailing his ear.

Syaoran was trying his best to convince himself that the factor which triggered this intimate, at least to him, action was just curiosity. Yet, he couldn't help but wishing and hoping that something more than curiosity was hidden behind her act as soon as he noticed the flush that enhanced her rosy cheeks so charmingly; nor was he able to prevent his heart from racing.

They searched for each other's eyes and the instant their gazes met, auburn was lost within jade seas and jade was lost within auburn seas...

And then, before he could stop himself, his hand flew upwards and covered hers. Their fingers intertwined whilst his thumb began caressing tenderly her small hand. After that he leisurely brought their hands to his mouth and softly kissed her palm.

Their hearts were now racing faster than they previously did and as his lips brushed on her palm ever so gently Sakura was entirely dominated by the warm sensation over again. His gaze never left hers and the young woman saw golden flames within them; flames that made the flush on her cheeks become more intense than it previously was.

His mild lips left reluctantly her palm and she let a low sigh of disappointment escape from her throat. Syaoran beamed warmly.

"It's getting late, we should get going."

Sakura nodded and let him lead the way up the final immense set of stairs. Silence fell upon them and utterly different thoughts were crossing their minds. The crimson colour was loitering on the young woman's cheeks and she was still engulfed by the warm sensation.

The young elf though was facing a little more perplexed emotions.

He was trying to comprehend why he was so powerless when it came to her. The shadow within her eyes was telling him that she had gone through something horrible in the past; something that made him decide to give her some space.  
So why was he unable to remain faithful to his decision? Why had he no signs of strength or willpower to prevent himself from being so intimate with her?

Syaoran glanced at Sakura and the first thing he noticed was the flush which was lingering on her cheeks and wondered of what she might be thinking. What if she detested him for getting advantage of her once again? What if she didn't want to see his face anymore?

Little he did know that her thoughts were nowhere near of what he was presuming with his mind...

Their feet soon led them at the last step of the immense set of stairs and once at the top Sakura realized that in front of their eyes was extending the forest she had seen earlier.  
Without much thinking she turned to Syaoran and challenged him to a race.

"Last one that gets at the core of the forest is a raw egg!" and without waiting to hear his response she started running towards the fringes laughing with the elf following her soon after.

The slight breeze that was hovering in the atmosphere was spreading the echo of her incessant laugh throughout the forest. Not even the songs of the dryads were able to compete with its brilliance because for him it constituted everything that he wished to hear at the moment...

The elf gazed ahead and realised that Sakura was already at the centre of the forest waiting for him to reach the place. A grin curved her lips the moment he approached and for the millionth time from the day that he first saw her, Syaoran felt his heart racing faster and faster with each second that was passing.

And the minute his eyes fell on that sweet beam of hers the elf knelt in front of Sakura and apologized from the depths of his heart.

"Gomen' nasai. _I'm sorry..._" he whispered and his eyes didn't dare to shift their gaze from the ground. The young woman knelt as well and her hand reached out moving towards his face.

The moment her fingers met with his skin she noticed that moisture was flowing down his cheek.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I'm sorry for being unable to prevent myself from getting intimate with you. I'm sorry for being unable to keep my promise to avoid doing anything unnecessary. I'm sorry for being so powerless..."

"I-intimate?" she stammered confused, but then realized that he was referring to the kiss they shared the day before as well as the incident that took place several minutes ago.

Sakura shook her head and embraced him as tightly as her powers allowed her to.

"There's no need for you to apologize. Your gentle words are always so heart-warming; your every action is able to cheer me up no matter how depressed I may be and your entire presence makes me feel protected. I have never before felt security by being with other people. Thus, don't underestimate yourself because to me you are much more than powerless."

"Hontōni?_ Really?_"

"Hontōni hontō. _Really really_."

"Yakusoku? _Promise?_"

"Yakusokuda yo._ It's a promise.._." she whispered and as he had done for her earlier that day Sakura carefully wiped his tears away.

"Arigatō. _Thank you..._" the elf replied and only then dared to look at her. She was smiling at him as always, but within her eyes was still lurking the darkness he had seen yesterday.

"I don't know what has happened to you in the past, but from now on everything will be surely alright." he said.

Then the young elf guided them at the other edge of the forest towards an immense silver gateway that was leading to his home; his re-assuring words lingered in her mind.

_'Everything will be surely alright...'_

The young woman had no reason not to believe him...

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hi everyone! How are you doing? I hope that you are enjoying your holidays as much as I do... I wanted to upload this before Christmas day, but due to some unwanted hindrances _(aka onii-chan and meddling parents)_ I was forced to upload this chapter today. Anyway, I hope that it was to your liking...

Enjoy the rest of the holidays and have a Happy New Year!

**Poem:**

**Meaning:**

_From darkness I understand the night:  
Dreams flow, a star shines  
Ah! I desire Evenstar. _

_Look! A star rises out of the darkness  
The song of the star enchants my heart.  
__Ah! I desire... _


	7. 6:Lament for The Lost

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura in any way. CLAMP does. I do own the plotline of this story though...

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Sidarin and Quenya. These two elvish dialects belong to their rightful owner who is no one else than Tolkien.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own the poems Breath of Life and Through Twilight and Shadow. They belong to their rightful owner who is no one else than Tolkien.

* * *

**Chapter 6:**

**Lament for the lost **

_To be able to grieve for the lost without being ashamed..._

**That is the meaning of one's true strength...**

The young elf opened the gateway and waited for Sakura to enter through the silver graven entrance. Nevertheless, the young woman didn't make any attempt to move forward; in fact she couldn't move at all.

Upon seeing the residence that laid behind the gate a wave of tenseness overpowered her again and her feet remained firmly pinned on the ground, obstinately refusing to step towards the elf.

Syaoran saw her wavering and smiled benevolently.

"This is your home now, don't hesitate..." he said and offered his hand to her.

The distance that separated their hands suddenly seemed enormous and for a brief second Sakura thought that any effort to close it would certainly be futile.  
And then her eyes fell on his kind beam and discovered that every ounce, every speck, every bead of audacity necessary was there, encouraging her to advance. The young woman didn't falter any longer, but reached out and took hold of his extended hand with confidence.

His grip was warm and comforting as always...

And with certain footsteps she entered through the silver graven entrance side by side with him.

Ahead of them was established an equally grand and magnificent garden. Cerise leaved bushes were decorating both sides of the pathway which led towards the main residence. Right behind the earth was carving up in several parterres which contained three species of blossoms known to her. Lilies, orchids and peonies; but aside these amongst them was also sprouted the silver lily...

A sigh of contentment came past the young woman's lips and Syaoran observed her amused as she was gawping around completely drawn in by the beauty and splendor. And when she finally found the words to speak her eyes were shinning with genuine gratification and excitement.

''This garden is really beautiful.'' she said.

''Arigatō, this garden has been my family's pride for several generations.'' he responded and looked the flowers as nostalgia was pilling up in his auburn eyes.

Memories and thoughts of the past as well as his parents loaded the young elf's mind. The expression on his handsome face altered to a distant and somber one. The fact that _Erin En Gurth_ was approaching wasn't helpful either.

Syaoran cursed inwardly the day on which _those unappreciative, deceitful, voracious and honorless creatures_ set their dirty feet on this serene and affluent land and caused its gradual weakening and continuous afflict.

To say that his people underwent severe anguish was undeniably a sheer understatement. Many were no longer among the living and many were left behind to lament for those lost.  
Grieving for the deceased was even more heartbreaking because both of his parents were among them.

Syaoran shook his head achieving to erase effectively the sore reminiscences of the far away past.

"Ikimasu. _Let's go ..._" he said lowly and the young woman nodded.

Just a quick glance was enough for her to notice the transform in his expression. However, she opted not to question him about it for the moment; he seemed so depressed and Sakura didn't want to make him feel worse than he already did...

They walked up the marble stairs and shortly found themselves in front of a timber made of mahogany door which had engravings that resembled the silver lily.

As soon as they entered through the entrance they saw a noble middle-age looking man standing at the hallway as if waiting for their arrival. He was tall and his short hair was grey. His presence was tranquil just like Syaoran's. Sakura observed with real interest as the two elves acknowledged each other's presence.

The elder elf bowed with respect and the younger did exactly the same.

"Konbawa. _Good evening_ Syaoran-sama, may I ask who your companion is?" he said and looked at Sakura who was smiling politely at him with kindness.

"Konbawa. _Good evening_ Wei-san, this is Kinomoto Sakura; she will be staying with us from now on. Sakura is the one I talked you about..." he said and the elder elf bowed for a second time in recognition of her presence.

"Konbawa. _Good evening_ sir. I'm Kinomoto Sakura, excuse me for intruding in your fine household..." she said and bowed respectfully at him.

"There's no intrusion at all Kinomoto-san. It's a pleasure to finally meet you and also thank you for taking care of Syaoran-sama..."

"That's not true sir, I really didn't do anything. Syaoran is the one who has been taking care of me..."

The elf smiled good-naturedly at the young woman and then turned his attention back to the younger one.

"Which room would you like me to prepare for her Syaoran-sama?"

"Please arrange the one next to mine at the east wing and also make sure that the other thing I told you about is ready as well..."

"Are you sure about this "

"Yes, I want them to be hers..." the young elf responded.

"As you wish." the other replied dutifully as he was bowing and prepared to leave, but before he could take a step away Sakura stopped him.

"May I offer you some help sir?"she asked eagerly.

The elder elf smiled at her again.

"I think that it would be more interesting for you if you kept company to Syaoran-sama ..."

Sakura's cheeks flushed a bit because of his comment and thus she hastily reply.

"Don't say that sir, I can..." but before she could finish her sentence the elder elf cut her off.

"I assure you that I can handle this on my own, now if you excuse me..." he said and departed beaming inwardly whilst thinking that his young master would be definitely content with this young female. She possessed not only a good-looking figure, but also a kind and compassionate soul.

Yes; the wise stars had proven their wisdom once more...

"Wei-san seems so nice." Sakura commented as soon as the elder elf disappeared from their view.

"He is..." Syaoran confirmed and then added curiously "…weren't you carrying luggage with you earlier?"

"M-my suitcase!" she stammered as realization came upon her with the speed of a hurricane; she had accidentally left it in Tomoeda.

Upset thoughts occupied her mind and her expression changed to a panicked one. All of her personal things were in that valise including her precious book. How could she be so careless and scatterbrained?

The young woman let a sigh of despair escape from her throat but then an idea crossed her mind.

"Nē Syaoran, is it possible to return back to Tomoeda to get my suitcase back?"

Now Sakura already knew that the possibilities for her suitcase to be still in the park were slim to none, but perhaps she was lucky enough and her valise was still there waiting for its owner to claim it. However, the calm expression on the elf's face confused her.

"There would be no need for that."

"Even if you say so, what about my clothes? I can't stroll around your hometown wearing nothing, can I?"

"Everything will be alright..." he answered cryptically and before she could protest more added "Come. I'm going to show you something which I already know you're going to love."

"Okay." she said rather reluctantly and let him take her hand in his once again.

Syaoran guided them through a number of corridors but Sakura didn't pay any attention. Her mind was preoccupied by plans of retrieving her valise. And before she could tell, they were in front of a large timber door which was adorned with the most impressive and wonderful engravings the young woman had ever seen.

At the top of the design was an arch with an inscription in this eerie language which read:

_« Amar En Sinta »  
"Home of Knowledge"_

Beneath the arch two pillars were engraved on either side of the door. Beside the pillars stood two trees and finally several ivies were growing against their trunks following the length of each tree. And when the elf pushed the door open and led her inside the young woman thought that she had entered seventh heaven. Before her eyes extended the most enormous and rich in content library she had ever seen. The high walls of the room were built with large niches. Equally huge wooden bookcases garnished each recess and much more books than she could count were sited on the numerous shelves. There was also a niche at the other side of the room which was adorned by an immense engraved fireplace.  
The warmth of the fire when was light was engulfing the whole room creating a hospitable and cozy environment.

It was a refuge. A shelter. A harbor. A sanctuary of knowledge…

Every previous thought that occupied her mind was now evaporated by this library that was everything a booklover like her could ever dream of and much more so ask for…

An exclamation of excitement escaped from her lips and without any further ado the young woman ran towards the nearer bookcase.

The young elf followed her amused and as soon as he reached her, saw that she was elaborating with evident curiosity and interest the leather bound paperbacks on the bookshelves.

"This is the biggest book collection I've ever seen. I think I can die happily now." she said to herself and laughed with content.

Her light and thoughtless words though saddened the young elf that shook his head and spoke with a stern voice.

"You should never talk about something as serious as death is so flippantly." he scolded and Sakura shifted her attention away from the books, rather reluctantly the truth is, and turned around to face him.

His facial expression even though strict was also carved by anguish and sorrow; his auburn eyes were darkened by ache and grief.

Sakura became conscious that something in her words was causing him insufferable soreness and depression. She wondered why. And thus, unable to hold back any longer, she asked.

"What's wrong Syaoran?"

"Nothing is wrong; I just think that it's irresponsible and unwise to think of death so carelessly."

"It was just an analogy, I don't literally want to die." she said apologetically.

"It's not important whether you mean it or not, passing away is not a matter that should be taken lightly."

"I'm sorry if my words distressed you…"

"I'm not distressed."

"Yes you are. Ever since we arrived at your house you've been somewhat distant. I'm not going to force you into telling me if you're not willing to, but please don't lie to me when it's so obvious that you are upset."

The young elf sighed and wondered why it was so difficult to hide his feelings from her. Why was she able to read him like an open book just by observing him? Perhaps his words also betrayed his emotions, but this did not change the fact that Sakura was effortlessly seeing through him.

And before he could stop himself, he opened his heart to her and for the first time after so many years talked about the dreadful past that had scared not only him, but also everyone in his kin.

"It's just that _Erin En Gurth_ is approaching and it only reminds me of chichi-ue and haha-ue. It's been so many years since then and yet time hasn't managed to heal my pain entirely.

Everything started many years ago, so many that just by thinking of it I'm feeling young again.

It began as soon as this cursed tribe of Fyrrnians first stepped into our lands. They were strange looking creatures. Their appearance resembled a human but at the same time a lycan as well; yes those were probably the most revolting living things you can ever meet in this world. Their leader was named Uldor and when he came in front of my father and me said that they were refuges from a distant country which was destroyed by an invasion of an attacking horde of youkai. Chichi-ue was always considerate and merciful to those in need and so allowed them to stay at Lathernia the southern region which is located near Menadiol the last of the four minor rivers of Berethal. Nevertheless, I wasn't entirely convinced by his sayings and furthermore I had a terrible feeling about ada's decision.

And thus I informed him about my objection, but unfortunately he told me that we must show kindness to those who need it no matter what the occasion is. Therefore, I waved off my bad feeling and prayed to the sacred spirits every day for everything to turn out well.

For several years our lives thankfully went by peacefully; it was as if they weren't here at all. They didn't bother us, so we didn't bother them. Alas after some years Uldor passed away due to his old age and that precise moment was meant to be the dawn of all the misfortune which came upon us.

Uldem, the most ferocious and malicious creature Valleria has seen, succeeded his father at the leadership. The first thing he did as their leader was convincing the rest to dispose of the inhabitants and conquer the lands. The only way to do so was by attacking us.  
Of course there was a small minority of elders who possessed an ounce of mind and opposed him, saying that they had no right to assail those who showed them mercy in their time of need. Be that as it may, they were all ignored and brutally killed by Uldem and his hot-blooded followers.

They crossed with ease Senarion the third of the minor rivers and entered Cellest the western region of Valleria. There they attacked the unarmed inhabitants.

Those creatures slaughtered everyone who stood in their path. No one was left alive; not even the women and children.

And from this point naneth's role in the story begins.

Mother was the most powerful miko Valleria saw since the days of the Foundation. Solely for that reason, she was the one Uldem feared the most. But even so, haha-ue was using her spiritual powers only for the benefit of this land and its people.

Every day she had to perform the ritual of _Thalion_ with the intention of strengthening efficiently the barriers formed by the sacred spirits that shielded the intact territories of Valleria. The only drawback was that she had to be at the borders of the lost lands with those that were still ours in order to not only perform the rite, but to make sure that the barriers were impenetrable as well.

Therefore, one day as she and the entourage of the fellow priestesses were crossing Arenstil returning from Rastellia the northern Region of Valleria, they were sneakily abused by a troop of Fyrrnians. The orders from Uldem were obviously to slay all of them. But unfortunately simply taking the lives of an unguarded and defenseless train which consisted only of females wasn't enough for these nasty creatures.

Hence, they began molesting them one by one again and again, tainting their pure souls.

And only after their corrupt and sinful urges were completely satisfied those creatures slaughtered them. Afterwards they acted as if their horrendous sacrilege wasn't enough and dumped the dishonored bodies heartlessly without bothering burying them. As soon as we found the lifeless bodies scattered within the shore of Arenstil all of us were infuriated by the sickening flaunt of impudence and absolute lack of respect. The one who was more enraged though was ada; it was the first time I was seeing him so incensed.

Without wasting any precious time he sent a messenger to Uldem and demanded that the two of them conducted a duel in order to end this once and for all. That foolish creature was more than eager to face father, so he accepted the challenge without any hesitation at all. I would have thought it better before I accepted if I were him, but if he was known about something that was his undue arrogance. So he made the tragic mistake to underestimate father…

The date of the battle was settled in four days time and so ada began training strictly from sunrise until sunset in both swordsmanship and archery. I trained with him as well because I wanted to avenge; not only haha-ue but also all those who had been ruthlessly slain by those unappreciative creatures and their rapacious leader.

The day of the combat approached us soon and both opponents were determined to exterminate the other. Their strength was equal and their blades furiously clashed again and again under a frenzied tempo. For quite a while no one was able to gain dominance and each strike was easily repelled by the other. That was until Uldem did a critical mistake leaving an opening and gave father the opportunity to defeat him. He was about to give him the fatal strike, but then that creature began begging for his life and so chichi-ue spared him under one and only condition; he and the rest of the Fyrrnians were going to leave from Valleria and never return for utterly no reason, not even if their lives depended from that. Uldem agreed immediately and so father trusted his words; that was his biggest mistake.

He had only took a few steps towards us when Uldem summoned a scarlet dagger out of nowhere and shoved it on father's back injuring him harshly. At that moment I saw completely red. How could this dishonest, two-faced snake do something like that to the man who just spared him? How could he do this to father?

I took an arrow out of my quiver and aimed his chest. The last thing he saw was my arrow flying towards him; seconds later it accurately hit its target.

Uldem did nothing but smirked foolishly as his body fell numb on the ground dirtying it by his filthy blood. That was the end of him and the last time we saw or heard anything about the Fyrrnians. As for ada, he gave in his injuries three days after the duel. You see the dagger that stabbed him was infused with a lycan's blood something which is venomous for any other living being.

The only way Mithrandir would able to cure him was by using erenir, a substance which was rumored to cure anything. But the mines from which it was extracted were long abandoned due to an avalanche.

Therefore, the only thing he was able to do was soothe the sting coming from his gashes with herbs and ointments. Since then, we honor the souls of the deceased on _Erin En Gurth_ which is basically the day of their deaths." Syaoran ended his narration and his shaky voice cracked.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know." Sakura said apologetically.

"It's not your fault; it's just that I don't want to lose anyone dear to me again." the elf said as tears began to flow down his face and ache clouded his auburn eyes.

"It's alright. I can't guarantee about the future, but I'm sure that ultimately everything is definitely going to be alright. But there is one thing I can tell you without any doubt and it's that I'm here for you and I'll always be." she said and did the only thing she could think of; she hugged him tightly and softly started fondling his back.

Syaoran buried his face within her hair in a desperate attempt to hide his face from her. He didn't want to be weak. Not in front of Sakura; not in front of her of all people…

"Arigatō. _Thank you,_ you can't understand how important having you here is to me." he whispered, burying his face deeper into her hair.

Being held by her small figure was soothing and consoling for the elf. Her embrace was his encouragement; his shelter; his harbor. And for the umpteenth time since the elf met the mortal, Syaoran realized that the young woman's presence was able to alleviate effortlessly the distressing pain within his soul.

Later that night and after having enjoyed a delicious dinner made by Wei in honor of their guest Syaoran led Sakura to her bedroom. It was located at the east side of the residence next to his. As soon as they reached the room Syaoran opened the wooden made from mahogany door for Sakura and waited for her to enter.

What the young woman saw amazed her completely.

Not only the bedroom was spacious enough to accommodate at least five individuals, but at the centre of the room there was a big-sized and comfy-looking bed with several fluffy pillows carefully placed against the headspring. There was also a comfortable armchair sited next to it.

Sakura noticed two other mahogany doors. The one led to a big washroom and the other to an equally big walk-in closet. She even had a balcony…

Her gaze shifted from the veranda back to the room and then to the elf who smiled kindly at her.

"Everything in this room belongs to you."

"All these are so much more than I could ever ask for..."

"There is something else I want you to have." he said and the young woman watched him walking towards the closet.

With an unhurried movement he opened the door-panels and revealed the treasures that were neatly placed inside. Sakura simply stood frozen unable to do anything else, but gape at its marvels. The closet was loaded with graceful gowns in every colour imaginable.

"These once belonged to mother; I want you to have them now..." Sakura looked at the gowns and then at the elf. She shook her head.

"It's so nice of you, but is it really okay for me to have them?"

"I'm sure haha-ue would have wanted the same thing..."

"Arigatō gozaimasu. _Thank you so much_." she replied and after admiring the content of the closet for a little longer, her gaze shifted to the balcony.

Unable to resist the young woman got out from the french window and found herself at the veranda.

And then realized that it was neither the roomy bedroom nor the large bed what excited her the most. Not even the closet with the gowns was nowhere near the exhilaration she felt as soon as she saw the view from the balcony. It simply took her breath away.

Before her feet extended the forest they had crossed earlier. She could clearly see all the giant trees with the golden leaves. From up there they seemed even more beautiful with their unique colored leaves swinging under the rhythm of the slight breeze…

She even viewed the entire town which was covered by the night's beautiful dark veil.A sigh of utter contentment left her lips and her soul came to ease.

Then the young woman turned to face the elf again.

"I- I'm home..." she whispered and Syaoran smiled tenderly at her.

Yes; the young woman was with him at a place she could call home and this single thought provided her with unlimited delight.

And this was the moment that their joint lives in Valleria began.

The days came and went in Estelle peacefully until the most excruciating and horrendous day for everyone in Valleria approached. That was _Erin En Gurth._

Over the passing of years consecrated on this certain day to conduct a memorial ceremony in honor of those who perished during the insurrection of the Fyrrnians.  
At first a mourning song was being performed by a chorus of unearthly, but nevertheless melodic voices, which by means of an inexplicable mightiness was heard throughout Valleria; folklore wanted them to be the voices of the deceased souls. Αnd then everyone knew that it was time to join the mutual lament.

This rite was taking place during the night hours and the habitants of Valleria formed four different processions; one for each region. Each one of them was separately heading to the shore of Arenstil whilst performing the chant so that the mutual grieve would be spread in every corner of the land. The last procession to arrive to Arenstil was the one deriving from Estelle and was the biggest of the four.

Then a new mourning song was being performed and according to the ritual the current leader of the kin coming from the capital was supposed to be the one reciting. However, seeing as the young leader was obstinately refusing to perform in front of others for so many years, no one was expecting to actually hear him singing the most important mourn of the ceremony.

Instead; under these circumstances Mithrandir was theoretically the one to perform the fundamental epicedium. Thus, no one was able to predict the unexpected turn of events that took place on that particular night.

Syaoran was standing at the garden gazing the silver blossoms with wistfulness. In accordance to the custom, he was holding a glass lantern and was dressed in dark colors. More specifically, he was wearing a moss green, long sleeved with diagonal waistline blouse and a pair of black pants.

Reminisces of his parents were coating his mind again. It was within this garden he used to run and play along with his parents when he was still a child. It was within this garden his mother used to sing for him hymns about life. It was within this garden his father used to tell him stories about the great accomplishments of their noble forefathers.  
It was in this garden that -

The elf closed his eyes and sighed. Every memory of his parents was directly linked to this garden.

However, reminiscing the days he had spent with his parents was no longer as difficult and painful as it used to be. And while his mind was loitering to the past, the night breeze brought to his ears the echo of the first mourning song.

_**"Uich gwennen na 'wanath ah na dhín.  
An uich gwennen na ringyrn ambar hen.  
Boe naid bain gwannathar,  
Boe cuil ban firitha.**_

_**Boe naer gwannathach."**_

The lament had begun and soon he would have to guide the procession as head and join in the grieving with the rest. Yet, the thought of the ceremony wasn't so unbearable any longer. Not even the prospect of fulfilling his forthcoming duty to perform the fundamental part of the entire ritual was so unthinkable any more. And the cause hidden behind this astonishing alteration to his point of view was no one else than Sakura.

The wise stars had predicted many years ago that she was the one destined for him; the one who would be able to remedy the gap that the loss of his parents had left within his heart.  
Indeed the young woman was slowly but steadily doing so.

Lingering in the past had no point any longer because his future was waiting for him to seize it. A promising future that was shining brightly ahead of him. A future that was going to be inevitably influenced by Sakura's presence. But in the end, as long as she was standing by his side, everything would definitely be alright…

He grinned at this thought.

Shortly he sensed a familiar aura approaching him. He opened his eyes and saw the young woman walking slowly to him. She was wearing a graceful misty green gown that made her look even more beautiful than she already was.

It was a long dress which was complimenting her slender figure. The most impressive element about the cloth was its bodice which was hugging perfectly her upper body. An intricate, but nevertheless delicate, embroidery carefully sewed with silver thread across the fabric was adorning it. The same embroidery was also stitched on the sleeves which were fitted to her elbows and then grew larger until they reached the base of her fingers. Its lace up back was held in place by two silver cords which were tightly tied and neatly set on the base of her thin waist.

But no matter how stunning the garment was, it was simply a piece of clothing. The one truly gorgeous in his eyes was Sakura herself.

She finally approached him and beamed warmly; in her hand she was grasping a blossom of the silver lily. Syaoran gladly grinned back.

"Are you ready to join the ceremony?" Syaoran asked and after taking her hand in his, intertwined their fingers.

The young woman squeezed his hand.

"Yes. I want to be with you in this…" she replied and the elf smiled warmly at her again.

He led the way through the forest and shortly they were descending the cobble steps. Silence was dominating between them but neither seemed bothered by it.

Whilst they were going down the young woman noticed that the rest of the abiders were simply standing in front of their residences as if waiting for something or someone. Every male was holding a glass lantern and every female was holding a blossom of the silver lily. Everyone was wearing dark colors.

Not long after the two began going down, everybody started following the young leader and his attendant with unhurried and measured, almost ritual treads. Soon enough they were walking past the town's walls and towards a valley which was full of willows.

The sky was beautifully painted in a dark blue colour and the countless stars were shining brightly above them. It was undeniably a wonderful sight to see and it greatly came into contrast with the utter silence which had befallen in the environment. It was as if nature itself was commiserating with the gloomy and doleful atmosphere. The only sound which could be heard was the one coming from the melody of the mourning song. The procession was shortly pacing amongst the trees.

Everyone participating in the procession was chanting the lament and the emotions which lay within their souls were borne through their voices that were overflowing with sorrow and longing for those that were no longer among the living.

As the procession kept moving, several stagnant flecks of light which seemed to be floating on the air were discernible ahead of them. The echo of the lament that was previously distant increased with every step that they took closer to the lights.

In a little while it became apparent that those specks of light weren't floating, but were coming from lanterns similar to those that the males of the procession were holding. The rest of the processions had already assembled in the shore of Arenstil.

Finally they reached the coast too and as Syaoran and Sakura as well as the rest participants of the procession coming from Estelle were passing in front of them, everyone bowed their heads in acknowledgement and respect too.

The procession came to a halt and the joint grieving song ended. It was now time for the most vital part to begin. The main lament was about to be performed.

The young woman clutched tightly the young elf's hand encouragingly and he took a deep breath before starting to sing. Everyone held their breaths as soon as the young leader's voice was heard.

_**"I ngîl cennin erthiel  
Ne menel aduial,  
Ha glingant be vîr  
Síliel moe.**_

At this moment all the females including Sakura came forth and stood in front of the river's edge. They were all holding blossoms of the silver lily.

_**I ngîl cennin firiel  
Ne menel aduial,  
And-dúr naun i fuin a galad firn  
Naegriel moe.**_

The women bent down and placed their blossoms on the water surface and joined the processions again. Sakura came to Syaoran's side again and listened to his performing.

Sorrow. Yearning. Hope. It was all in his voice.

It was the most devout and yet wonderful listening she had the blessing to hear up until then. Soon every blossom was swept by the flow of the river.

_**An i natha  
An i naun ului  
A chuil, ann-cuiannen."**_

The lament ended and the sound of the elf's voice slowly faded. And then two familiar figures appeared in front of him and the young woman.

"Ada. Naneth. _Father. Mother…_" he whispered with wide eyes, not believing that both his father and mother were standing right in front of them.

Their eyes were gazing at their son with melancholy but despite their feelings of sadness they both smiled affectionately at their only son. When his mother spoke, her voice was as kind and warm as he remembered it.

"Avo acheno, nîn iôn. _Don't look back, my son_. I adaneth na lín na Undomiel. _The woman at your side is your Evenstar…_" she said and beamed kindly to the young woman.

Sakura was standing a little back, not wanting to interfere to their reunion. They were talking in their peculiar language again, but she was able to distinguish the soreness and longing in their voices. But suddenly the older woman's voice rang in her head.

"You have faced a lot in your past. Don't let the bitter feelings consume your heart. Be strong. Have faith in the future…"

Sakura's eyes widened in surprise and as she was looking the other woman, a few tears welled up in her eyes. She could only nod in comprehension of her words.

At the same time the older male was speaking to his son.

"No veren. _Be brave._ No thalion an he ah le. _Be strong for her and for you_." he said to his only son and glanced at the young woman.

Syaoran could only nod at his words.

Then the older woman walked slowly towards the younger and after taking her hand in hers, she led her towards her only son. She united their hands and then stood at her husband's side, beaming warmly at the two.

"You are each other's hope. Don't forget that." she told them whilst their figures began fading.

The young elf and the young woman nodded and remained still watching them vanishing, until there was nothing left from their figures. Afterwards, they began walking on the road of return, their hands tightly clasped. Each of them had different thoughts about the future, but in the end they both came to the same conclusion.

Tomorrow was a different day and whether it rained or shined, as long as they were together, everything would definitely be alright...

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hi everyone! I'm back with a new chapter which I hope you enjoyed reading...

-_chichi-ue_: is an archaic word for father. It was used when one held great respect for their dad.  
-_haha-ue:_ is also an archaic word for mother. It was used when one held great respect for their mum.  
-_thalion: _is an elfish word for strong. In this case I'm using it to refer to strength.  
-_Erin En Gurth_ Day of Death

**Poems:**

**Meaning:**

_You are not bound to loss and silence.  
For you are not bound to the circles of this world.  
All things must pass away,  
All life is doomed to fade..._

_Sorrowing you must go [and yet you are not without hope]_

**Note: **The section in brackets is part of the poem on which the song is based, but does not appear in the actual song

**Meaning: **

_I saw a star rise high in the _  
_Evening sky, _  
_It hung like a jewel, _  
_Softly shining._

_I saw a star fade in the _  
_Evening sky, _  
_The dark was too deep and so light died, _  
_Softly pining._

_For what might have been, _  
_For what never was. _  
_For a life, long lived. _


	8. 7:Confessions of the hearts

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura and its characters. CLAMP does. I do own though the plotline of this story.

**Disclamer: **I do not own the song _'Into the West_' it belongs to Annie Lennox and the rest of its composers.

* * *

**Chapter 7: **

**Confessions of the hearts**

_To be able to acknowledge whatever lies in your heart...__**  
That is the meaning of one's true strength...**_

_Sakura was inside her bedroom having locked the door in a desperate attempt to shield herself from the dangers which laid within the rest of the house.  
It had been almost two months since the dreadful night wherein that beast named Touya attempted to snatch her innocence. Almost two months and Fujitaka as well as Nadesiko were still entirely unaware of the abysmal occurrence and they were suspecting anything neither. Sakura hadn't mustered the courage to tell them and truth to be told, she wasn't intending to do so either.  
The little schoolgirl was embarrassed of what happened and terrified of their reaction to her sayings about an incident she thought that was her fault.  
She believed that perhaps she had done something really bad which triggered his weird behavior. That's right. Her big brother would never do such an awful thing to her without a reason. But night, after night, after night, her faith to him was collapsing, until it shattered into million pieces…  
Outside, a heavy storm was taking place and every once in a while a lightning would illuminate the sky, turning momentarily the night into a day. The child was lying on her bed hidden underneath the comforter. She wasn't afraid of the monsoon or the occasional thunders and lightings. It was another person, or preferably beast, the one she was frightened of; a monster that had easily caused her life to become a constant nightmare.  
Her clock stroke eleven, but she was still unable to fall asleep. The little girl was aware of the fact that there was no possible way for that brute to get through the blockade of the locked door, but she couldn't prevent the feelings of apprehension and fright from spreading within her system.  
Suddenly, steps where audible from the hallway; steps that kept coming closer and closer until they halted in front of her door.  
Sakura held her breath, as she realized who the person standing at the other side was. It was no one else than her brother who was once again trying vainly to gain access into her bedroom._

_The knob twisted to the left, but his effort to open the door was fortunately fruitless. He turned to leave, but not before whispering an insult loud enough for her to hear.  
"Hey, little honey. You must know that the more you keep avoiding me, the more you're turning me on. I promise that one of these days I'll get you and when that happens, you'll regret the day you decided to stay away from your o niichan. I'm actually thinking of inviting Yuki over too. I know you have a crush on him and the other day he was telling me of how much he misses seeing you, so I'm sure he'll be glad to join us. Aren't you happy to hear that kaijuu?"_

It was an ordinary silent and tranquil night in Valleria when suddenly a deafening scream orientating from somewhere in Estelle, pierced the peace of the hours of the darkness.

"Iya! _No!_ Stop saying such shameful words, ONEGAI! _PLEASE!_" a certain young woman with light brown hair shrieked whilst being asleep within her bedroom in a certain residence.

The clamorous yells caused a certain young elf that was lying awake on his bed inside his bedroom to be alarmed. Without wasting any second, said elf hurried to the room next to his, only to discover a sweaty and struggling with the sheets young woman. On her face he could clearly distinguish fear and torment.

'She must be seeing that nightmare again.' the elf thought as he was sitting on the edge of her bed.

The young woman, as if having sensed his presence, reached out and grasped tightly his hand with hers, but neither did she wake up and nor did she stop tossing.  
Instead, she kept gibbering and her facial expression was shadowed with even more agony and terror while the incubus kept haunting her sleep.

"I don't want this Touya! You can't force me to do something like this! YAMERU! _QUIT IT!_" the young woman who was no one else than Sakura, said and tossed wildly yet again on the bed.

The young elf who was no one else than Syaoran, tightened the grip of their hands and sat nearer to her.  
He was growing further and further worried with each nighttime that was passing. Her reactions to this incubus seemed too realistic for it to only be a dream. He used his other hand and with his fingers softly brushed away the bangs that were covering her shut eyes. The young woman twitched her eyes slightly, but nevertheless didn't open them.

Then Syaoran started chanting a lullaby that his mother used to sing for him every time he had a bad dream. The lyrics were nostalgic and bittersweet, but nonetheless the entire melody was captivating.

_**"Lay down**__  
__**Your sweet and weary head**_  
_**Night is falling**_  
_**You have come to journey's end**_  
_**Sleep now**_  
_**And dream of the ones who came before**_  
_**They are calling**_  
_**From across a distant shore**_

_**Why do you weep?**_  
_**What are these tears upon your face?**_  
_**Soon you will see**_  
_**All of your fears will pass away**_  
_**Safe in my arms**_  
_**You're only sleeping**_

_**What can you see**_  
_**On the horizon?**_  
_**Why do the white gulls call?**_  
_**Across the sea**_  
_**A pale moon rises**_  
_**The ships have come to carry you home**_

_**And all will turn**_  
_**To silver glass**_  
_**A light on the water**_  
_**All Souls pass**_

_**Hope fades**_  
_**Into the world of night**_  
_**Through shadows falling**_  
_**Out of memory and time**_  
_**Don't say**_  
_**We have come now to the end**_  
_**White shores are calling**_  
_**You and I will meet again**_  
_**And you'll be here in my arms**_  
_**Just sleeping**_

_**And all will turn**_  
_**To silver glass**_  
_**A light on the water**_  
_**Grey ships pass**_  
_**Into the West"**_

The lullaby ended and gradually the sound of the elf's voice faded. Sakura was now sleeping soundlessly and serenely.

"Sore wa daijobuda_. It's alright_. Nothing is going to harm you anymore. Boku wa koko ni iru. _I'm here now_." he whispered.

And as if having heard him, a small grin curved the young woman's lips. The grip of their hands tightened for a brief moment and then Sakura's fingers loosened their clasp, gradually releasing his hand. Syaoran though, didn't leave from her side. He decided to keep an eye on her for the night in case she had that incubus again. Thus, he retired on the armchair which was located near the bed.

His watchful and concerned eyes didn't leave her sleeping figure, until sleep consumed him slowly as well. The night hours went by little by little and the following morning welcomed everyone in Valleria.

Back in a certain residence in Estelle a certain young woman with light brown hair was slowly stirring awake as the golden sunrays reached her eyes. Her eyes twitched slightly and then opened leisurely revealing a stunning emerald colour. The female, who was no one else than Sakura, registered her surroundings and then her eyes fell on another figure that was silently sleeping on the armchair. The outline belonged to a young male elf who was no one else than Syaoran.

His head was slightly angled to the side and therefore his long bangs were now enveloping almost entirely his closed eyes. His chocolate brown, messy hair was even more tousled. His hands were resting on the lower region of his abdomen. His chest was raising and falling as he was breathing in and out softly. His face was serene and relaxed and finally a little smirk curved the corners of his lips.

And then as the light of the sunrays was illuminating further the room, the elf mumbled something incoherent and as his eyes were slowly opening so as to face the daylight, he started to stir.

The young woman observed with interest his drowsy and somewhat clumsy movements as he began to rub the sleep away from his auburn eyes. He was looking so adorable that she had to resist with all her might the sudden urge to ruffle his hair. Then his eyes travelled around the room in order to register the area which surrounded him and soon his gaze fell on the young woman who was sitting on her bed and curiously studying his figure. He offered her a weak beam that due to some remaining pits of drowsiness turned into a deep yawn causing Sakura's laughter to erupt.

Seeing her laughing and smiling so whole-heartedly especially after having seen her anguishing and struggling like she did the previous and almost every night in general, was very unanticipated but also encouraging; unforeseen because she was acting as if nothing was wrong and cheering because it seemed that she wasn't devastated by it.

But he knew better than letting his guard down. He wasn't fully confident about his assumption, but perhaps her incubus was in some way connected with the darkness that was clouding her emerald eyes.

Not today and beyond any shadow of a doubt not tomorrow either, but definitely someday in the near or far future, the young elf was going to wipe everything that was haunting her out. He was determined to. But then her sweet voice rang to his ears and brought him out of his reverie.

"Ohayo Syaoran-sleepyhead…"the young woman said between her laughs.

"Ohayo Sakura-loth. Melin ceni hin lîn sίla i 'eladhach… "

"Dôl lost lîn…" Sakura replied and saw him raise an amused brow.

"Sōna ndesu ka?_ Is that so?_ So my head is empty? Lasto lalaith nîn. _Hear my laughter.._." he said mischievously and burst into laughing.

"Daro i! _Stop it!_ I can barely speak the Elvish language and you know it…!" she responded and feigned being hurt.

However regardless of her playful and apparent acting, hearing his laughter was remedy for her. A cure able to alleviate the stinging ache of the reminiscence and every thought of the bad dream and she was very grateful for that.

Days had become weeks. Weeks had become months.

It had already been one and a half month since the day the young woman had first set foot in Valleria. One and a half month during which the nightmare was visiting her dreams nightly, but thankfully a certain elf was tirelessly singing a lullaby for her. A lullaby that was causing it to disappear.

Day after day, after day, soon after her eyes opened to welcome the following morning Sakura was always finding Syaoran asleep on the armchair next to her bed. His presence was each and every time consoling. Nevertheless, she dreaded the day he was going to ask about the reason behind the incubus and the young woman was sensing that sooner or later this day was going to approach.

In fact, something inside her was sensing that it was meant to happen someday in the near future…

His voice though rang into her ears and brought her out of her thoughts and back to reality.

"Goheno nin. _I'm sorry_…"

"Unfortunately I'm afraid I can't forgive you…"

"Why are you saying this?"

"Because I'm eternally and irreversibly wounded by your insensitiveness." she said, placing her batten on her forehead and arching her head a bit to the back to add a small touch of drama.

The next thing they knew was that both of them were laughing from the bottoms of their hearts.

"Eternally? Irreversibly?" he said and arched a half-serious, half-amused eyebrow.

"Can't I be a little dramatic?"

"A little? That was certainly not a little if you ask me."

"Okay fine. Perhaps I was exaggerating a tad…"

"You think so? I wonder why…" the elf teased with a mischievous smirk adorning his lips.

"Me too…" the young woman retorted, shrugging her shoulders at the same time. Syaoran shook his head amused, his grin growing wider.

"Anyway what would you like do today?"

"I'm thinking of having a shower and after that a good portion of breakfast and after that I'm open to suggestions."

"Okay, then I suppose I should do the same and afterward go and help Wei prepare some breakfast for all of us." he said and looked at the young woman seeking for her agreement.

"It sounds great."

Then the young elf got up and walked with fairly sluggish footsteps towards the door. He stood at the door-frame and turned back to Sakura.

"See you later Sakura-loth." he said before walking away giving her the opportunity to only nod.

The sound of the door to his room closing was heard and the young woman processed to stretch for a few pleasurable moments. After that she got up and went into the washroom.

In there a spacious porcelain bathtub awaited for her. Each time she was bathing the water coming from the faucet was miraculously always warm without anyone having heated a geyser or anything of the sort beforehand. It was as if the room itself was expecting her entrance whenever she felt like cleansing herself or having a quick shower.

About half or so, hour later she was standing in front of the wardrobe, looking at its contents thoughtfully.

After not so much debating, she decided on wearing a beautiful ice blue, linen-silk long gown that fitted her figure flawlessly and flowed graciously behind her each time she moved.

The bodice, which was diagonal on the waistline, enveloped her upper body perfectly and thus outlined her curves. An intricate embroidery of vines agilely sewed with white thread garnished the length of the décolletage. The same needlework was also stitched around the eyelets of the lace up back that was tightly held in place by two thin white cords neatly laid on the base of her back. Its white muslin sleeves were fitted on her elbows, but then gradually grew larger as they reached and rested on her knuckles. On each elbow several narrow white threads were stitched. Each one separately was so tapered that was almost invisible. However, they were needled in a design that wanted each thread to mingle with the rest in order to create a crisscross design across the length of her forearm and therefore an illusion of just one thick thread was given to the eye.

Lastly, she finished brushing her light brown tresses and let them fall freely past her shoulders. Cute little ringlets curved their edges as her locks slowly began to dry naturally._**  
**_**  
**Sakura was now looking at her reflection on the long mirror which was lodged on one of the door's panels and gasped, almost not recognizing her reflection. The fact that she looked nothing like she previously did when wearing the clothes she used to consider normal, never ceased to amaze her and moreover the fine details as well as the delicate work of each frock were admirable._**  
**_**  
**Suddenly a slight gust entered the room from the wide-open french window and engulfed her as if inviting her to join it in admiring the wonders of the world dotted outside her balcony door. And Sakura, unable to resist, answered its teasing calling.

Soon, she found herself in the round balcony, absorbing the exquisiteness before her eyes and breathing in the fresh air that surrounded her.

She felt revived.

Gone was the aloofness. Gone was moroseness. Gone were the issues with her tempter.

She felt rebirth.

Like a phoenix reborn from its ashes.

And the one who had drawn her up from her own ashes was no one else than a certain young elf named Li Syaoran.

Nevertheless, despite the unprecedented happiness she was feeling, there was something that kept eating away her insides and Sakura knew very well what it was. And no matter how hard and obstinately the young woman tried to avoid it, she was meant to face it inevitably in a matter of a few weeks. But for now the unsuspecting Sakura continued to savor the grandeur of the sight offered to her eyes._  
__**  
**_A soothing fragrance overwhelmed her, tickling her nostrils and causing her to inhale deeply, greedily relishing its aroma.

Lawn blended with wet soil. It was his scent. Syaoran's scent.

She beamed to herself as his odor as well as presence advanced nearer and nearer to where she was standing. Before long, he was beside her, taking her hand in his letting his fingers interlace with hers.

For a little while neither made any effort to utter any words and therefore allowing themselves to sink within the depths of silence which fell upon them._**  
**_**  
**Syaoran was observing the young woman with the corners of his eyes.

The slight breeze made her hair dance along with its rhythm, playfully tangling within her locks and to his eyes she was looking like a nymph. A nymph that was sent by the wise stars. A nymph that was destined for him and only him.

The elf was well aware that thinking of Sakura as his and solely his was arrogant, but he couldn't stop himself from thinking so.

As the days were coming and going and he was spending more and more time with her, he had come to realize that the emotion which he held for her was gradually altering into something completely new. It wasn't any more mere friendliness and liking. Of course these feelings were still there, but there was also another emotion mingled among them. An emotion that was growing deeper and deeper each time he was with her.

And the moment her attention was turned to him and the emerald orbs met his auburn pools, his breath was stolen and his cheeks were painted a faint crimson color. He smiled warmly and felt his heart accelerating its beating.

Yes...

There was no mistaking this feeling. He was falling in love; he was falling in love with Sakura and this thought was filling him with utmost bliss._**  
**_**  
**Her sweet voice that rang into his ears like the sweetest song brought him out of his musing.

"Is there something wrong on my face?" the young woman inquired.

"No. Your face is as beautiful as always, I was just thinking of something else."

Her cheeks flushed momentarily, but the emotion of timidity was very soon dismissed by her inquisitiveness.  
"And what was that?"

"I'm afraid it is a secret…" the elf said and grinned mischievously.

Sakura sulked, but didn't complain verbally.

Her eyes were fixed on his tall figure. He was dressed in a linen-silk azure chemise and a pair of plain white trousers, but nevertheless the simplicity of his attire was only adding points to his entire presence. The slight breeze was interweaving within his already tousled hair muddling them even more and the golden sunrays were generously enhancing the brilliance of his auburn eyes that were returning her gaze unwavering._**  
**__  
_And suddenly, without her realizing how it happened, in front of the young woman's eyes was standing a completely different Syaoran.  
A Syaoran who suddenly was inexplicably, but nevertheless incredibly, handsome. Her cheeks painted pale crimson upon this realization.

How come she hadn't seen it earlier? How come she never noticed?

She couldn't tell.

All she knew was that her eyes were now looking at him with a different gaze. Her heart skipped a beat and for a brief moment she thought that maybe, just maybe, her feelings for him were slowly altering. That perhaps the warm sensation she was always feeling when he was present was in reality attraction. She shook her head erasing the thought.

No.

There was no possible way she was falling for him, was there? After all, Syaoran was still Syaoran, right?

Her thoughts were interrupted by his profound voice ringing in her ears.

"What are you thinking Sakura-loth?"

Her cheeks flushed darker upon hearing the nickname, but even so she managed to reply nonchalantly using the exact same words he had used earlier.

"I'm afraid it is a se-cr-et…"

"You're not fun." Syaoran pouted.

"Never said I was." she teased and gave a little squeeze at the hand that was still holding hers.

"Kill joy."

"Stubborn."

"Secretive."

"Nosey."

"Sakura-loth?"

"Nanidesu ka Syaoran-sleepyhead? _What is it?_ " Sakura asked with curiosity and saw glints of golden flames within his eyes as he took a deep breath before responding…

"Aish...- _I lov...-_" he started to say but was abruptly interrupted by Sakura's loudly rumbling stomach.

"Gomen' ne. _I'm sorry..._" she apologized and laughed nervously.

Judging from his solemn facial expression, the young woman was quite certain that he was about to tell her something of great importance. However, her dim-witted stomach decided to interfere, interrupting him and utterly ruining whatever he meant to say.

_'Stupid stomach.'_she cursed inwardly.

Nevertheless, much to her relief the elf didn't seem bothered by the interval. Instead, his features softened and his solemn expression changed to an amused one.

"Food comes first before anything else for you, doesn't it?" he joked and smiled warmly at her.

"It's not my fault. I'm still growing and I need to eat so that I'll grow up properly." she replied in a half-serious, half-playful tone and saw his grin grow wider._**  
**_**  
**"Doesn't that basically mean that you're plainly gluttonous?"

"Shut up and give me some food."

"Hai, hai. _Yes, yes..._" he said laughing before leading her back in the room and then to the dining hall.

There a bountiful breakfast prepared from Wei with Syaoran's help was waiting for them. Sakura had to try her hardest so as to not run to the table upon seeing the wonders that were laid on it, but even so she was unable to stifle a squeal of utter excitement escaping from her lips.  
After having eaten and after the young woman's stomach was full and satisfied they decided to ride out of Estelle to the shores of Ardour.

It was the shoreline where the flows of the four minor rivers intermingled in order to form Berethal, the Grand River.

Therefore, once done helping Wei clean the table and the dishes up, Syaoran guided them outside the residence and then through the forest in the direction of the massive stairs and eventually to the bottom level. From there they headed towards the massive stone walls. Not before long, they were outside of the town where he came to a halt. Sakura stopped right behind him._**  
**_**  
**The young elf whistled and right afterwards remained motionless and silent, listening to the echo which was travelling through the air and observing the horizon, seeking for something. Several moments ago a beam curved his lips as a distant silhouette became discernable to their eyes. The figure was approaching them fairly rapidly.

It belonged to one of the most admirable and virtuous creatures that had walked, or rather ran, in Valleria.

It was one of the Elleya the ancient race of the first horses.

Soon, in front of their eyes halted a beautiful brown with black mane horse. Syaoran took a step closer to the animal reaching out his hand and gently stroked its forehead and then neck. It reacted by neighing to his touch.

"Màra aurë Brego, Im gelir ceni ad lîn. _Hello Brego, I'm happy to see you again..._" he said caringly and gave it a tender smile similar to the ones he offered Sakura so frequently.

The young woman was standing a little behind, watching them interacting with genuine interest.

Syaoran's movements towards the horse were full of gentleness and care and the gracious animal was gazing at his partner with eyes full of attachment and esteem._**  
**_**  
**"There is someone I want you to meet." he continued and gestured to Sakura to come closer.

Said person hesitantly stepped ahead to some extent, feeling uncomfortable and ashamed of being there; feeling that her presence intruded the scene between the two.

"Brego this is Sakura. She's a very important person to me and I would like you to treat her the same way you do me." he said and the horse slightly walloped a hoof on the ground to show its acceptance of his words.

"Mae govannen Brego, eneth nîn Sakura. _Well met Brego, my name is Sakura_." she greeted the animal coyly and then saw it lowering slightly its head in acknowledgment of both her presence and greeting.

A smile shaped on her lips and she felt contentment upon seeing its response.  
Syaoran grinned as well and rubbed the horse's forehead. The young woman stood there entirely entranced by the beauty of the noble animal.

"He is really beautiful."_**  
**_**  
**"Brego is member of the ancient clan of the first horses. The Elleya. However, there are few left these days." the young elf said and for some reason his eyes were filled with anger.

"I'm sorry to hear that. Why are there so few of them?"

"For many years and even more centuries, the Elleya were traversing and running freely lengthwise of the lands of Valleria. However, when the uprising of the Fyrrnians burst, a great number of them was caught and slaughtered pitilessly; I still can't understand why though. The few that managed to flee this horrible fate scattered in a rampageous state and therefore ceased to be a pack.

I found Brego wandering over the shoreline of Ardour a few days after chichi-ue joined haha-ue in the spirit world. He was badly injured in his barrel. Thus, he was fearful and didn't let me approach him. No matter what I did, he ended up nickering rowdily and walloping his hooves warningly, so I let him be even though I came to regret it later.  
_**  
**_One day, as I was walking along the southern banks of Evellin I came across him again. This time he had collapsed near the river.  
The poor animal was in vast pain and as a result was whimpering. The sound of his cries which pierced my ears was poignant. I cautiously drew nearer and noticed that his wound had spread further. It was now covering an amount of his shoulder and even worse, it had been infected. To make a long story short, he was dying a slow and agonizing death. I felt a thousand daggers prick through my heart because the worsening of his condition was my fault. I shouldn't have left when I first saw him…_**  
**_**  
**Fortunately near that area was sprouting dictamnus, a remedial plant used in herbal ointments. Hence, without much effort I located a bush and cut a generous quantity of the basil from its branches. I carefully washed the leaves in the stream and after crushing them, I carefully applied the salve on every inch of his wound. I spent the night beside him, praying and hoping that the next morning will arise for the both of us. The following day I awoke to the sound of low nickering.

I opened my eyes and saw his figure towering over me. His eyes were gazing at me with gratitude and I discerned that his wound thankfully was starting to heal. Saving not only haha-ue and chichi-ue, but also everyone else, was out of my league, but at least I was able to aid Brego, so naturally I felt utmost gladness filling me…" Syaoran finished talking and stroke the horse's neck.  
_**  
**_"You two are very close, aren't you?" Sakura asked, but it was more of a statement than a question.

The elf nodded.

"That day I gained a loyal friend…" he said and offered yet another smile to the horse.

"If I didn't know better than this, I'd say that you're in love with him…" she teased and saw his beam grow wider.

"Brego is a brother to me, but indeed I'm falling for someone. A young female several years younger than me to be precise…"

For some inexplicable reason the young woman felt an overwhelming knot tightening her chest upon hearing his words, but nonetheless ignored the emotion and inquired him about the mysterious female's identity with curiosity.

"Do I know her?"

"Better than anyone…"_**  
**_**  
**"Really?" she asked surprised, wondering who the woman was._**  
**_**  
**At that instant she felt a slight sting of jealousy towards the person who had his affections, but shook the thought away. She was his friend and as such cheering for him and supporting his choices, no matter what they were, was what she was supposed to be doing and not feeling envious. After all friends always support each other, right?

Yet for a brief moment a new and utterly different thought crossed her mind. A mere friend. Was that all she was or would ever be to him?  
Somehow this thought was agonizing, unbearable and heartbreaking. She felt a huge void inside her. A void that made her feel as if she was falling into nothingness.

But then, she shook her head, effectively dismissing the notion as quickly as it had emerged in her mind. What was wrong with her? Where all these odd thoughts were coming from? Syaoran was her friend and nothing more than that, right?

She saw his eyes closing momentarily as he took in a deep breath. The minute they were open again Sakura was able to discern clearly the flames which were dancing within them. He opened his mouth to talk. Strangely enough, the young woman felt her heart beating faster.

Little she did know that her heart was not the only one racing...

"It is you. The one I'm falling for is you Sakura-loth…"

His eyes were looking straight into hers unfaltering as silence followed his words. For a little while Sakura stood frozen, allowing the words to process in her mind.

Afraid.

She was afraid._**  
**__  
_Afraid that her ears were deceiving her.

Afraid that his words were nothing more than a sheer creation of her imagination.

And then, as if having sensed her qualms, Syaoran took her hand in his and whilst squeezing her palm, uttered with gentle and also steady voice the words she longed to hear her entire life. Three simple words.

The words she always thought nobody was going to say to her…

"Aishteru yo, Sakura-loth._ I love you, Sakura-blossom..._"

Silence followed his words for a second time while some tears moistened the young woman's eyes. For a few moments, that seemed an eternity as he was gazing into her watery eyes, the elf was tense and feared that his straightforward words, even though earnest and truthful had upset or even worse offended her.  
_**  
**_But then, completely unexpectedly since he was growing more and more anxious, she tentatively approached him, clasping tightly his azure chemise with her fingers and hid her face against his chest.

"Hannon le. Thank you for saying these words Syaoran…" she whispered.

"Law, hannon le. _No, thank you._ Thank you for being part of my life…" he replied and enveloped her small frame with his arms, enclosing the young woman tenderly in his embrace._**  
**_**  
**For quite a few moments neither the young woman nor the young elf made any effort to recoil from their affectionate hold. Instead, she clung tighter on his trunk. It felt right to the both of them…_**  
**_**  
**When she finally unburied her face from his torso and raised her head to meet his intense gaze, a docile grin curved his lips and Sakura discovered in it every ounce and every droplet of the unprecedented and incomparable feeling of being loved…

His eyes silently asked her if she wanted to proceed with their plan of riding to Ardour. The young woman simply nodded afraid to trust her voice._**  
**_Hence, the elf assisted her to get on Brego's back and then mounted behind her. His arms wrapped once again around her frame and brought her close to him, enfolding her figure with his. Sakura didn't writhe or move away from his seize, but safely nestled her back against his torso.  
A small smile curved his lips and without any further ado he addressed to the horse.

"Noro lim, Brego. _Ride fast, Brego. _Noro lim. _Ride fast..._"

The horse nickered in comprehension of his words and then without wasting time began galloping north leaving behind the town and its giant stone walls.

Ahead of them extended clumps of enormous firs and pines as far as the eye could see. The distance that separated the riders from the clusters of trees was graduallygrowing smaller and smaller and very soon the three were among them. On their massive roots, as the young woman noticed, were growing hundredths of miniature blossoms which resembled the silver lily…

And only upon seeing them for the umpteenth time, Sakura became aware of the fact that the certain blossom was sprouting and garnishing almost every corner in Estelle. They reminded her in every way of common lilies; in every way except for the color. White, pink and even orange, she had seen them before. But not these oddly, yet beautifully colored blossoms.

These were silver, but this quaintness only added to their beauty and the young woman couldn't help but breathe in, absorbing the delicacy and exquisiteness of their fragrance. A small smile curved her lips, as she sank deeper on the elf's upper body.

Syaoran felt his heart beating frantically against his chest as if it was desperately trying to break free from its prison. So madly that he was entirely persuaded it was competing with Brego's velocity of running. He took a deep breath as his arms almost instinctively wrapped around her outline firmer, his figure engulfing hers completely. His sharp eyes followed her gaze and fell to the tiny blossoms. An identical to hers beam curved the corners of his lips.

"Their beauty cannot be compared with yours…"he said with his profound voice and his mild words repeated again and again in the young woman's ears, making her cheeks flush and heartbeat increase.

She took a deep breath trying to prevent the crimson color from spreading further and heart from accelerating its beating more, but it was to no avail._**  
**_The blush obstinately kept spreading steadily on her cheeks and her heart kept thumping so frenziedly that she was convinced Syaoran could hear its loud beating with ease.

It was so embarrassing... Why was it refusing to stay still?_**  
**__  
_She opened her mouth to respond afraid that the words would never leave her lips; afraid that the words would never form a coherent sentence. But even so, was surprised hearing the words coming out evenly. In a way she felt relieved…

"Thank you… what kind of blossoms are they?"

The elf smiled a bit melancholically before replying…

"They are called silbellin…"

"Silbellin, silbellin, silbellin…" she repeated again and again, attempting to remember if she had read in some book about them previously, but nothing came to mind. So she sighed disappointed that her knowledge failed her before concluding aloud.

"I've never heard of them…"

Syaoran let a laugh, but nevertheless sad laugh, escape from his throat.

"Silbellin is the outgrowth of ada and naneth's union under the nature's law. One day when I'll unite with the one I love the same will happen. A new blossom will flourish in whole Valleria as proof of our becoming one…" he said in a stochastic tone and sent a quick glance to her.

Sakura sensed his gaze on her and felt her cheeks flush crimson even more. She opened her mouth to respond, but at the process forgot the words she meant to say.

They spent the rest of the journey in silence, each of them lost in a labyrinth of not so different thoughts. After some time the horse reached the fringe of the clumps of trees. Not so far ahead of them was laid a widespread shoreline. It was Ardour.

In a little while the horse arrived at the coast and hence came to a halt, but neither Syaoran nor Sakura seemed to notice so Brego neighed, notifying them that they had reached their destination. Both of them jumped in surprise.

"Hantale Brego. _Thank you Brego._ Thank you for bringing us here." Syaoran said to the horse and got down at once.

Then he offered his hand to Sakura and helped her to dismount. The young woman looked around with interest the instant her feet reached the ground.

From the four directions of the horizon were approaching the shore equally numbered small brooks that gradually merged with each other and after a few miles formed Berethal. And in the background Sakura could clearly discern a distant and faint outline of an immense mountain.

"This is Ardour Sakura-loth. " his voice sounded from behind her.

"It's really beautiful. Thank you for bringing me here." she said and walked to the edge of the waterside and sat on the cobble land.

The young woman sighed happily and closed her eyes, letting herself enjoy the sound of the running water. Syaoran soon joined her and took her small hand into his, interlacing his fingers with hers. He closed his eyes as well and his mind drifted away. They sat side by side, drowned in utter silence for a little longer.

The only sound that disturbed the tranquility which was dominating between them was the swish of the flowing water. A few more silent minutes passed, until the young elf stopped his musing and began unfolding the train of his thoughts with Sakura listening to his talking attentively.

"I remember the first time I came here as if it was only yesterday. It was when chichi-ue departed from this world too. I was miserable and also outraged, but by simply looking the water my soul came to peace. I always thought that the course of the flowing water has the ability to wash away anything; whether it is a sad feeling, a bad memory or even an incubus. I hope and pray the same happens for you…"

Sakura's emerald eyes widened in surprise. The gears of her mind began granting her conscience as she struggled to find the words to answer.

"W-why are you saying this?" she stammered her response and saw him hesitating for a bit before continuing talking, as if carefully choosing his next words. The young woman dreaded of what was to follow.

"Perhaps I'm going to cross the line by starting this conversation, but I'm worried about you Sakura-loth. Night after night, after night since the day you came to Estelle I'm hearing you gibbering about someone named Touya and when I'm entering your bedroom I always find you tossing and struggling with the sheets. Last night was no exception. At first I thought it was only a bad dream, but after seeing you every nighttime in this state, I no longer think so. I've come to believe that maybe it is something that occurred in the past and is somehow linked with the darkness that lingers in your eyes. I'm not going to force you into telling me everything if you're not willing to, but I'm going to ask you not to act as if nothing is wrong anymore because you and I know very well that it's not true..."

The young woman lowered her head not daring to make any eye contact and whispered her reply.

"I'm sorry for always causing you unnecessary troubles…"

Syaoran shook his head and beamed warmly to her.

"Caring for the one I love is my duty."

Sakura felt even guiltier upon hearing his gentle words and shrank to his side. A few tears slid down her face and all the hidden sorrow of her heart and soul came to the surface, overwhelming her. And before she could stop herself from talking, she finally entrusted her worries to him**.**_**  
**_**  
**"I knew this day was going to come soon or later and I'm sorry that I hid the truth from you all this time, but you have to understand that I'm embarrassed and ashamed of what you are about to hear and I really didn't want you to leave from my side. I just hope you won't judge me harsh after hearing this."

The young woman paused talking and took a deep breath. She closed her eyes and before her decisiveness failed her, unshielded herself completely and let her guard down completely for the first time in eight whole years.

She opened her eyes again and for a brief moment she momentarily hesitated, but then her gaze fell on Syaoran's encouraging smile and that was all she needed to start unravel her emotions and open her heart. Speaking about her darkest secret was always not an option for her, but here she was ready to do so. Ready to tell the story from the very beginning.

"My family is a family of four. There is otou-san, okaa-san, my older brother Touya and me. You can say that we were a normal family with a normal life. Otou-san and okaa-san were happy for us and always claimed that their love for us was equal, but Touya was always the one receiving their praise for his great achievements. Anything I did was unworthy and sometimes, entirely overlooked.

I realize now that if there's one thing my parents taught me, is that receiving love was something I wasn't worthy of...

But despite their cruel and unfair behavior towards me I was struggling to make them notice my existence and neither was I holding a grudge against Touya for always being at the spotlight. The years were passing though and I was forced to give up. I learned to live in solitude and depend on no one instead. This was my biggest mistake…

My nightmares began eight years ago, the night of otou-san and okaa-san's marriage anniversary. I remember that they were out, celebrating themselves in a local restaurant. Touya and I were left in home. No baby-sitter was with us since Touya was a very responsible young man, according to their sayings, and thus he was in charge for both of the house and me.

I was sleeping inside my bedroom, when out of the blue he came saying he wanted to check on me. His presence was menacing and the words he said next were strange, but at that time he was my respectful and gentle older brother who was unable to hurt anyone. So I waved off the bad vibes I was sensing, thinking that I was thinking too much.

Unfortunately for me, I wasn't...

Soon after sitting on my bed he started caressing me and then tried to...to...to... "

Sakura's voice by that moment was shaking and tears were falling endlessly from her eyes. She wanted all of this to stop. She wanted to stop talking. She wanted to forget everything...

The elf didn't press her to continue. Instead he squeezed her small hand and began stroking the top of her hand with his thump softly. The young woman slightly tensed to the sudden touch, but nonetheless didn't take her hand away. His caress was gentle and comforting and not forced and violent like that brute's...  
_**  
**_She took another deep breath and started talking again.

"He tried to r-rape me. He didn't manage to robe me from my purity because otou-san and okaa-san arrived at home in the nick of time. When they saw me crying he just claimed that I had a bad dream and he was there to console me. Needless to say, they believed him. I didn't dare to say otherwise because I thought that his weird behavior was my fault. At that time I believed I had done something really bad that had triggered that reaction from him. So I kept quiet even though this hidden truth was and is still hurting me…

After that night I started locking my door in order to protect myself from another potential assault. And indeed for sometime he kept coming every night and whispered insults at my door, making me feel ashamed of myself as if depriving me from my dignity wasn't enough…  
I began bottling up my emotions and convinced myself that as long as he wasn't able to touch me again, his insults didn't matter. But they did matter and they did hurt me like anything else in the world because even though mere words, I had no one to console me and no one to tell me that everything would be alright…"_**  
**_**  
**The young woman finished her narration and lowered her gaze to face the ground. She hadn't the courage to confront his gaze. She was scared of his reaction.

The elf thought that words weren't needed and pulled her into his gentle embrace protectively, shielding her trembling frame from the rest of the world and the dangers lurking within it. Sakura didn't tense but let herself to be surrounded by his arms and also consoling presence and instctively clang on him as tight as possible, afraid that if she let go he would flee.

But he didn't...

Instead, the hold of his arms around her remained firm, yet tender and soothing, allowing her know that he was there for her...

The young woman was feeling safe with him she couldn't and wouldn't deny it, but nevertheless the tears resumed pouring from her eyes, soaking his blouse. Yet Syaoran didn't yank this time either, but began rocking her back and forth feeling the trembling of her body that shaked her entire form.

Gradually her quivering died down, but the elf didn't release her from his embrace, refusing to let her go. Instead, he held her tighter and whispered the words he now knew she longed to hear...

"It's alright. Everything is fine, I'm here now. Nothing is going to harm you anymore. I'm here and I swear to protect you."

Sakura raised her head to meet his gaze, tears were still apparent within her eyes.

"Even from yourself?"

Syaoran tightened his hold on her and gazed at her with eyes loaded with unflagging intensity and concern. His voice was solemn and steady as he spoke.

"I would rather kill myself than harm you. I swear to you that someday I'll make the darkness that haunts your eyes disappear."

Sakura saw the golden flames dancing again into his sharp eyes that were now gazing at her with passion. She read sincerity into his worried features and instantly knew that he was speaking the truth…

"I believe you." she whispered softly.

The elf beamed warmly to her and gently wiped the remaining tears from her eyes with his thump._**  
**_**  
**"Cry no more because I'm here to protect you and help you carry your burdens. I love you Sakura-loth…" he said and gently kissed her forehead._**  
**_**  
**Sakura closed her eyes as soon as his mild lips touched her skin and let a low sigh escape past her lips. The elf grinned again and pulled slightly back to bring his mouth close to her ear. His breath hit against it as he spoke.

"Ae esteli nad, esteliach han. _If you trust nothing else, trust this._ Estelio veleth._ Trsut love_."

The young woman felt the warm sensation engulfing her yet again. Her eyes slowly opened and saw his piercing auburn eyes looking straight to hers. Her heart began beating fast as realization slowly sank to her. She leaned in and let her lips touch softly his cheek.

"Thank you for everything you have done for me so far. Thank you for appearing in my life Syaoran…" she whispered against his skin._**  
**_**  
**It was no longer simply amity the emotion she held for him. It was something greater and deeper. An emotion she had experienced only once, but this time it was more exhilarating and breathtaking. There was no mistaking this feeling...

She was falling in love. She was falling in love with Syaoran and this thought filled her with utmost bliss…

The elf slowly stood up whilst Sakura was still within his arms. He walked towards his horse and gently placed her on its back. Then he mounted behind her and pulled her to him protectively, framing her figure with his once more. Everything seemed like a dream to them and if they were both dreaming, then neither wanted to wake up...

Brego began galloping towards home…

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hi everyone, I'm back ! Once again I'm so, so, so,..., so sorry for the late update. Even so I like how this chapter turned out. I hope you enjoyed reading it too.  
Another note is that I'm slightly disappointed that people aren't reviewing as much as they did when I was first writing this. I may not ask for reviews, but no author dislikes reading a nice review. Same goes for me...

So please make my day brighter and review... please? =^^=

**To A Reviwer **here's a quick answer to your quick question: fear not my friend, your name means day... ^^


	9. 8:Riddles to be solved

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura. CLAMP does. I do own though the plotline of this story though...

**Chapter 8:**

**Riddles to be solved**

_To be able to overcome your fears.  
__**That is the meaning of one's true strength...**_

A few days came and went after the day in which the young woman revealed the truth about her incubus to the young elf, bringing December only a breath away from its end.

During these three days Sakura was thinking over and over about the events of that day that proved to be special in her life.

She felt allayed in a way because if Syaoran had not started the conversation regarding her nightmare, she would never be able to summon the courage to tell him about it and consequently would be condemned to bear this secret until the end of eternity. She now understood that talking about it with someone was what she longed for deeply inside her and the fact that this someone was Syaoran only made her feel gratitude…

The elf had earned her sheer respect and affiance because he had been there for her when she needed him the most. He hadn't mocked her or even worse, sent her away as if she was contained with a contagious disease. Instead, he had remained to her side and comforted her, whispering consoling words. Words that made her feel special; words that made her to believe that if he said so then everything would be surely alright.

And at last she could breathe the fresh air freely because she wasn't obliged to hide behind her finger anymore.

Everything seemed to be flowing peacefully, but hitsuzen is a callous and merciless mightiness which controls the turn of events and pulls our strings as if we're nothing more than meagre puppets and alas this was only the calm before the real storm...

A well concealed might which was sleeping a long and undisturbed slumber within Sakura's subconscious was now gradually awakening, breaking its fragile seal. Therefore the newly acquired, and thus frail, balances within the young woman's soul began wobbling, until they crumbled causing her to hear and see things. Things that led her close to facing her worse fears because no one is able to escape the clutches of whatever frightens them.

Despite the fact that the season was in the core of winter snow hadn't made its appearance yet and according to Syaoran, it hadn't snowed in Estelle for several centuries. Conversely, it constantly rained during nights and Sakura really liked listening to the noise of the rain falling and smelling the fragrance of wet earth. A fragrance she had grown very accustomed and attracted to.

Yet, seeing countless snowflakes hovering into the air was nostalgic and Sakura really missed admiring landscapes dressed in wonderful pure white dresses. However, she constantly reminded herself that everything she truly needed was already given to her.

Serenity. Assurance. A shelter. Someone she could put her faith on.

But above all, someone who loved her despite her flaws and insecurities. And this someone was no one else than Syaoran…

Syaoran who was always ensuring that nothing; absolutely nothing was deprived from her. Syaoran who was offering everything to her unconditionally without asking something in return. Syaoran who loved her dearly. Syaoran whom she loved in return…

Therefore, she relentlessly scolded herself, saying that she shouldn't be an avaricious creature that constantly seeks for more. Even if more in her case meant measly snow.

And as December finally gave its place to January and the days came and went, the young woman started hearing snivels; snivels that were coming from a non-existent source. It was an afternoon following to the first weekend of the new month when it all began.

Sakura was roaming within the hallways pointlessly, trying to pass her time when suddenly she became aware of the fact that somebody was weeping.  
It was strange; strange and worrying because no one else was with her in the residence at that moment. She gulped and after suppressing a sudden shudder, the young woman strode with small and hesitant steps to its direction. The echo was distant, but she could tell that it was coming from the east wing of the residence. The wing where the bedrooms were located.

With each tread she took the whinging was growing more and more audible and she was now able to discern faultlessly its orientation.  
It was coming from her bedroom and very soon her feet brought her in front of her door.

The young woman felt a jolt of quivers running down her spine. She swallowed uneasily and with a tremulous hand pushed the door open. As she was entering the room slowly, Sakura looked around carefully in search for the source of the snivelling. Yet no one else was inside the room.

And thus, without mentioning anything about it to the young elf, she dismissed the incident as nothing more than a pure creation of her vivid imagination.

But this was not the end of this…

Two more days came and went until Sakura heard the weeping sounds again. This time when the sobs began she was in the library searching for a book.  
Strangely enough, it was coming from the same space she was in, but once she looked around, searching for the source no one was seen and the snivels faded away as abruptly as they had began.

Similarly to the first time, the young woman did not say anything to Syaoran and dismissed the incident as another making of her imagination.

That was of course until she started hearing the sobbing more and more frequently to the point where the crying sounds were heard daily wherever she went. It was as if the snivels were following her and every time she searched for the source, the howling vanished.

By this point and after, Sakura began feeling tense and a tinny bit jittery.

As the days passed though this apprehension she was feeling kept growing, until one evening it became tremor.

The sun was garnished in a pale orange-red hue and as it was slowly setting the scenery beneath was adorned in this tint. Back in a certain residence, the young woman was patiently waiting for Syaoran's arrival.

As each day since January's arrival the young elf was at the town with the elders, inspecting and helping the preparations for the winter, were needed, and making sure that every abider was sufficiently prepared. This was the last day of the muster and she was well aware of the fact that he would be extremely wearied. Thus, she was waiting for him into the main hall with a cup of endelir in her hands. Endelir was a drink prepared from milk and endel, an aromatic plant very similar to tea, which was able to soothe and take away the exhaustion.

Yet, as Sakura was in the main entrance, ready to exit the residence and wait at the marble steps in order to welcome the elf back home, a distant but nonetheless familiar sound diverted her attention from the task at hand. The colour drained immediately from her as she gulped, realizing what the noise was.

Again. It was the snivelling…

The young woman was now feeling a little bit edgy and tried to withdraw from the entrance hall and escape from the residence.  
Even so, her feet refused obstinately to obey her commands and as if possessing minds of their own started walking towards the opposite direction, leading her to the source of the sobbing.

Again, it was coming from the east wing of the residence and as her steps were bringing her closer to the source, it became obvious that the weeping was once more originating from her bedroom.

Furthermore, an unearthly voice was now creating a whisper; a whisper that was uttering a single word over and over.

"_Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama…"_

Sakura's instinct for a strange and inexplicable reason sensed that the voice was calling for her and, as though bewitched by its chant, let her tread to it. Her strides brought her further and further near her bedroom until she was standing in front of her door, debating whether to enter or not.

The eerie voice as if having sensed her presence chanted its mantra again, urging her to reach for the knob.

"_Come to me mama…"_

And the young woman as if spellbound, acted as the voice instructed; reached out and grabbed the handle, twisting it to the left. For a brief minute she hesitated before entering, but once again her feet as though having minds of their own, they guided her inside the bedroom.

After a first look no one was there and Sakura was about to sigh in relief, but then her eyes fell on a small figure that was sitting hidden behind her bed, in the corner created by the french window and the wall.

As she was cautiously approaching it, noticed that the outline belonged to a little girl. She was sitting with her knees brought close to her chest and her small hands were wrapped around her legs. Her face was bent and also hidden between her knees, but nevertheless the young woman was able to tell that the younger girl was not more, not less than four or five years old.

Sakura saw that she was rocking her little body back and forth as sobs were shaking her entire stature.

The young woman knew this instant that one way or another she had to help the girl. She knelt in front of her and placed her palm on her shoulder; the girl didn't react to her touch, but kept on crying and whispering the one word which had led Sakura inside the room.

"Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama. Mama…"

"Where is your mama little girl?" the young woman asked, but received no answer as the girl kept weeping.

Sakura's gaze down casted to the child's outfit and noted that it was awfully recognizable. She frowned at this, but be that as it may paid no further attention to it as she tried to make her say something.

"What is your name little girl?"

This time the girl responded to her question, but her voice was barely audible. Even so, the young woman was able to hear what she was saying.

"X-Xiao M-Mei…"the child stuttered her given name and hiccupped.

"Well Mei-chan, I'm Sakura nee-chan. Can you tell me why you're crying?" said person asked as her hand moved from the girl's shoulder to her back and started caressing it.

Sakura wasn't able to understand why, but something about little Mei's presence was vaguely familiar. Her thoughts were interrupted though, as the child spoke again.

"Mama doesn't want Xiao Mei with her. Mama doesn't love Xiao Mei..." the little girl said and a new wave of snivels and quivers shook her small form.

She was a defenceless tiny creature in the verge of collapsing with no one to help her. Sakura knew very well how this dire and detestable sentiment of vulnerability felt like and for that sole reason knew she had to aid the girl.

"I'm sure that your mommy loves you with all her heart and I bet that right now is really sad and upset because you Mei-chan aren't with her." the young woman said in a gentle and comforting tone, but was surprised to see the child shaking her head in denial.

"Mama doesn't love Xiao Mei. Mama doesn't want Xiao Mei. Mama doesn't love Xiao Mei. Mama doesn't want Xiao Mei." the little girl kept repeating her mantra, unaffected by Sakura's consoling and encouraging words.

Aforementioned person was at a loss of words.

Anything she did or said was fruitless, pointless, vain and futile because little Mei was persuaded that her mother didn't love her. Again. The young woman knew the sentiment of being redundant very well. A loner. An outsider. An interloper to everyone. Even your own family.

Again. She knew she had to help the poor child, but her words weren't effective. Again, Sakura felt inadequate and feeble. That was until her gaze fell on the forgotten cup with the warm drink and then the most rational and plain, yet unseen until that moment, solution came to her. The drink; that was the answer to the predicament at hand.

She extended her hand and offered it the child, her gentle words encouraging little Mei to take the cup.

"I might not be able to help you more efficiently right now since my words don't do, but at least please drink this Mei-chan; it's endelir. It'll help you relax a little bit and once you've calmed down, we will find a solution to your situation together."

"A-arigatō…" the little girl whispered her response and as her hands unwrapped from her legs and she slowly raised her head to receive the cup, Sakura saw a pair of watery emerald eyes staring her back.

The young woman was now able to see that Xiao Mei was a miniature of herself. Her facial features were portraying the appearance of a younger Sakura. Everything was identical; apart from the hair.

The little girl possessed tangled hair that were falling beneath her shoulders and were blessed with a light shade of golden-brown. Among the tousled locks were also tangled quite a few tresses garnished with a certain shade of chocolate-brown hues. The combination of colours was awfully familiar…

To say that the young woman was simply taken aback would be a complete understatement. She was bemused. Staggered. Bewildered.

Her eyes observed carefully as the child began sipping the drink within her tiny hands with small gulps. She saw now that the pair of emerald eyes was adorned with a few auburn tints. A colour that was identical to a pair of auburn eyes which was awfully familiar to her as well…

Gradually her petite figure ceased quivering, but nevertheless the almost identical pair of emerald eyes lingered watery. Sakura noticed something haunting them, something distant but nevertheless familiar. It was longing; longing and loneliness.

She knew these sentiments very well because she was feeling lonesome day and night for as long as she could remember. But she wasn't feeling this way anymore because someone had appeared in her life and made her days sunnier. And therefore, she decided to be that someone for Xiao Mei.

Her hands wrapped tightly around the small girl, enveloping her little figure as soon as the cup with the drink was empty and set on the floor next to her.

"It will be okay Mei-chan, Sakura nee-chan is here…" the young woman said in the most gentle and comforting voice she could muster.

"M-mama…" the little girl replied almost whispering the word, burying her face against Sakura's upper body and for a brief moment the older female thought and could have sworn that little Mei was referring to her.

But then she dismissed the preposterous thought and focused her attention back to comforting the girl in her arms.

"It's okay Mei-chan, Sakura nee-chan will find your mama and have a talk with her…"

The young woman felt the child's fingers clasp tightly on her garment as she was slowly raising her head to look straight into the older female's almost identical eyes. And after that little Xiao Mei said something that puzzled and worried Sakura more than she already was.

"Xiao Mei wants mama to face the one she fears the most." the child said and disappeared into thin air, leaving behind her a startled Sakura who was now hugging nothing more than air.

One single word was lingering into her mind.

_**Mama…**_

Unless her ears were playing nasty tricks to her, little Mei called her mother right before she disappeared. But why?

She couldn't comprehend…

And then were her words of facing the one she feared the most. There was only one person Sakura feared till this day, but how did this little girl know about his existence?

She couldn't comprehend…

As a result a new question arose; who was in reality Xiao Mei and why did she know about her hidden and, until recently, unspoken fears?

Again, she could neither comprehend and, in addition to that, nor was she able to explain this fact rationally and this ignorance as well as inability of hers was what frightened her the most.

Everything seemed so unrealistic and for a brief moment she doubted her mental stability. How could she be sure she hadn't imagined every single thing that just happened? How could she be sure she wasn't daydreaming? The answer was simple.

She only had to look at the empty cup that was left on the floor beside her to be assured that this was not a creation of her imagination. At long last, the only thing which remained in her mind was the fact that riddles were arising on the horizon.

Riddles that needed to be solved…

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hi everyone! I'm back with the newest chapter...! I know it's awfully short, but it's very, very, very interesting, ne?  
I'm sure that you're wondering who Xiao Mei is, ne? Well... that's for me to know and you to find out... :P

Anyways, thank you for bothering to read this... Please leave me a review and make my day sunnier... =^^=

**xSaphirexRosesxFanx:** hi! long time no see... I'm glad to see that you're reading this again... I hope this was a fast enough update..


	10. 9:Answers to Lead us forth Part I

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura. CLAMP does. I do own though the plotline of this story though...

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Quenya and Sindarin. These two elfish dialects belong to their rightful owner, Tolkein...

* * *

**Chapter 9:**  
**Answers to Lead us forth  
~~Part I~~  
**

_To believe in yourself and your worth...  
__**That is the meaning of one's true strength...**_

The days passed one after the other in front of the young elf's eyes, bringing December only a breath away of its end.

Winter in Valleria was tarter to the Outer Lands, the landscapes expanding beyond Berethal, because the Nageki no Yama; _the Mounts of Sighs,_ heightened up to the sky and held back the first signs of bad-weather. The arrival of January brought smaller days and bigger nights. However for every inhabitant it meant only one thing; the beginning of arrangements for the rest of the winter.

The young elf as leader of his clan mustered the development of the workmanships accompanied by the wise elders, aiding wherever assistance was needed. Gathering the weeds from the eastern fields so that the females could prepare suilon; the elfish bread for the winter. Gathering wood for the fireplaces to keep the houses warm. Repairing the old warehouses in the first level so that the food supplies could be stored safely.

All that and many other things needed to be done.

The one offering his aid and strength was Syaoran; not because the other supervisors didn't wish to assist the rest of the males, but because of his youth. The young leader was several centuries younger than the elders and hence stronger and more vigorous. The younger elf wasn't the one to complain though…

His inability to be more sufficient for his people during the rebellion of the Fyrrnians, akin to his mother and father, was something that always distressed and tormented him. Therefore, being now able to be of use to his kin was offering him absolution and atonement for his past failure.

Nonetheless despite his uncertainties and fears, not a single person of his race accused him for the misfortunes brought to them by the atrocious and detestable creatures called Fyrrnians.

Instead, his genuine and sincere heed for their needs was the trait that made him the most respectable and admirable of the Eldars because,  
in spite of the young of his age, the young leader was humble, earnest and selfless. Always minding for everyone else's welfare before caring for his own. These were the qualities that made him not only a good leader for everyone in his people, but also a fine and admirable person.

Returning home was what the elf was anticipating for each day, because Sakura was waiting for him with a cup of endelir within her hands.  
She always welcomed him back with a sincere and doted smile, saying three simple words,

"Nathlam gar Syaoran- draug… _Welcome back Syaoran-draug _"

Hearing this heartening phrase and seeing that sweet beam of hers adorning her face was enough to warm his heart and extinguish every hint of fatigue he might be feeling. It was the kind of beam he knew she treasured and kept for him and only him. The kind of beam that made every fiber, every molecule and every ounce of his essence flutter.

The kind of beam that made his heart skip a beat. Or maybe two.

Each day that was passing, they grew closer and closer. He could not help but smile broadly because of this gradual and blessed turn of events.

Everything seemed to be flowing peacefully at last…

It had already been ten days since the most meaningful day in his entire life. The day when the young woman opened utterly her heart and soul to him. Ten days since she spoke about her darkest fears, entrusting her qualms to him. He was grateful for that. Honestly.

Because now that he was aware of this dark page in her past, he would be able to fulfill his promise to eliminate the darkness lurking within her emerald eyes…

The frequency of her nightmares had lessened, enabling the young woman to enjoy peaceful dreams like she deserved to. And lastly, ten days since the day on which he plainly admitted the true nature of the feelings he harbored for her. The day on which he professed his love to his Undomiel…

He had yet to receive her answer, but was not discouraged. Sakura was still at his side and it only filled him with hope; hope that the one fated for him shared his feelings.

To love someone means to worship and respect them. To give them space and be close to them when they need you. To let them go, even if it kills us.  
No matter what her decision was Syaoran wasn't disposed to force his feelings to her. No matter if it caused him pain. Even if he had to let her go. Because he loved Sakura from the bottom of his heart. Little he did know that she loved him back…

As the first week of the new month ended the elf noticed a little, barely noticeable, change on her behavior. Behind her nonchalant and smiling façade he was effortlessly able to distinguish the almost faultlessly concealed uneasiness. It alarmed him, because it was slowly transforming to fright as the days succeeded each other.

Up until that moment he wasn't aware of the cause responsible for the new sentiments that were currently torturing her, but was determined to discover it. Yet each time he tried to ask what was distressing her, Sakura, being the stubborn person that she was, would always say with a false broad smile that everything was alright.

Syaoran understood…

Most of her life, the young woman had been a self-sufficient person that courageously underwent everything life threw to her, depending solely on her own strength and capabilities. He knew and respected it.

Nevertheless, there was one thing he could not grasp. It was the reason why she was pretending in such an obvious manner, the moment her eyes reflected unmistakably that something was bothering her… He could only assume.

Perhaps she didn't want to mention anything out of fear of bothering him with further of her uncertainties. Perhaps she thought this unprecedented, at least for her, dependence on him was unnecessary or even a burden. To her or him; he couldn't quite put his finger on it. Maybe to the both of them. Perhaps in the end, he was needless to her. Perhaps she thought he was inadequate to help her out with anything troubling her. This last thought, pained him greatly…

These were though only notions derived from the part of his self that was insecure and disbelieving of his ability to be of use for Sakura. And as such, they were not true. Because Sakura needed him as much as he needed her.

But today… today was different because today was the final day of arrangements and the time to return to home was finally here. Nevertheless, as the elf walked on the path of return, a menacing premonition plagued his heart.

Even so, he paid it no heed and shook his head, erasing the forewarning from his thoughts in an attempt to be more buoyant. And thusly, he continued his pathway whilst humming a song not in the elvish, but in the common language.

"_Home is behind  
The world is ahead  
And there are many paths to tread  
Through shadow  
To the edge of night  
Until the stars are all alight  
Mist and shadow  
Cloud and shade  
All shall fade  
All shall fade"_

Yes. Everything dark and ominous was meant to fade as long as faith light the mutual lane he and the one he lived and breathed for were crossing.  
The path that he and Sakura were crossing. A small beam curved his lips at the notion as he crossed the last cluster of trees with golden leaves.  
Ahead of his eyes laid the residence he and his reason to live shared. The residence wherein his reason to breathe patiently awaited his return.  
Their home.

Just the mere thought of having someone whom he cared for waiting for him –apart from Wei, that is- warmed his heart. Any thought of vagueness and trepidation lingering in his mind disappeared at that precise moment; the moment in which he walked through the silver-graven gates and the familiar sentiment of hospitality engulfed him. His beam grew wider as he walked through the pathway with the cerise bushes and his nostrils were assaulted by the light scent of cinnamon and jasmine. It was her scent...

His eyes then fell on the feminine form standing on the marble stairs yet again and the familiar sentiment of tenderness and affection engulfed him.

His dryad was there, dressed in a pure-white gown which enveloped her outline around her upper curves and waist comfortably and hardly flared out at her hips until it reached her toes. As in every other gown she had worn thus far, the sleeves were fitted to the elbows and then grew gradually larger until they reached and covered her knuckles.

An embroidery was adorning the bottom of each sleeve. It was a delicate needlework which resembled a butterfly and decorated the front and back side of the left and right sleeve respectively. The contour of the design was sewed in straight stitches with thick black thread and the fillin straight stitches as well; however it was seamedwith thin mauve thread. Under her breasts the piece of clothing was enhanced with a thick, linen mauve belt which was doubled around the waist and crossed in the back.

A few of her light brown locks were loosely tied in a small plait on the right side of her head. Within the restrained curls was braided a velvet ribbon that matched the emerald of her eyes. The rest of her tresses were free.  
She was exquisite…

Even nature itself was generously contributing to her loveliness.

The breeze of the early-evening was causing her garment as well as curls to dance along with its rhythm. The pale orange sunrays were illuminating her figure, making her appear like the dryad she was.

She was breathtaking…

The young elf felt his heart beating faster as he approached her with quick and eager treads, anticipating for the three words to finally be uttered again.

"Nathlam gar Syaoran-draug." the young woman said with her usual smile as she slowly walked down the steps and stood right in front of him; he noted absentmindedly that she was holding no cup in her hands.

The phrase his whole entity was ardent to hear the entire day was spoken again and yet it sounded different to his ears. It was as though the words belonged to someone else and were spoken by her only out of duty. The natural enthusiasm always ringing in her voice as each word was uttered, was not there.

The smile her lips were currently wearing was achingly foreign and false. The emerald eyes were not really looking at him. Her expression was lost and faraway. This was not the Sakura he knew and was accustomed of. This was not the Sakura he spent his days with. This was not the Sakura he lived and breathed for.

This… was not his Sakura.

His sharp eyes caught the confusion and nervousness she was desperately trying to mask and his senses were at once alerted. Something happened whilst he was away; there was no doubt about it. And whatever this something was, it obviously fretted her…

"What's wrong Sakura-loth?"

"Syaoran-draug… I'm not so sure myself. Strange things have been happening around me lately. Things I can't begin to explain logically. Heck, I'm not even sure I am not envisioning everything…" the young woman replied with honesty, obviously not baring to hide the truth anymore and the elf could see that she was indeed not sure of what happened. He wondered why.

The tone in her voice was a little shaky and it was apparent that the nonchalant exterior she was espousing the previous days was now falling apart rapidly, as was she.

Out of instinct, Syaoran wrapped his arms around her frame, enclosing her somewhat trembling figure with his. His cheek nestled against the top of her head and it was within his embrace where Sakura slowly found peace.

For a while he didn't speak and nor did she as he waited for her fear to wear off and she for her trembling heart to cease wavering. And it did wear off, slowly but steadily as his presence for the umpteenth time shielded her from the rest of the world. The elf felt her breathing in and out in sync with him, as her mouthfuls of air warmed his neck making him shudder inwardly.

She, in the other hand, was drowning in the waves of serenity as her nostrils were assaulted by his scent. And as his deep and calming voice calling her name echoed to her ears, she was engulfed by every essence that was he.

His presence. His voice. His scent.

Every essence that was he, she felt connected with. It was within his arms where Sakura found peace for the umpteenth time since their first meeting and realized how much he'd done for her.

How much he cared about her. And just how much she cared about him too…

She felt rather embarrassed upon realizing this and her cheeks charmingly flushed to a pale crimson shade. And then his voice echoed to her ears once more, bringing her out of her trance.

"What do you mean envisioning?"

Sakura raised her head and witnessed the auburn gaze searching for hers with worry. It only meant one thing; he was concerned about her yet again.

She didn't wish for that. She didn't wish to disturb him with any of her probably imaginary daydreams and illusions. He was preoccupied with supervising and helping his kin through their preparations. And she knew just how much exhausted he was when he returned home, no matter how hard he tried to hide it. She didn't wish to be a burden to him, but aside of her wishes, he was already concerned for her as it was…

In a way it made her happy, as selfish as it may sound.

She bit her lip nervously as she tried to put her thoughts in order. She knew that Syaoran was waiting for her answer and was rather grateful that he was being patient so far. But for how much longer he would be; that… she didn't know.

A few minutes later she took a deep breath, finally having an answer ready on the edge of her lips.

"Lately I've been hearing someone weeping. In the corridors, in the library, in my room, in the cooking room, in the garden; anywhere I go.

It's daunting and it makes me think that the snivels are following my every step. And yet, each time I turn to look for the one weeping, I see no one and the bawls end as abruptly as they begin.

But today…today was different. Not long before you returned I heard the sniveling again and as I followed the noise, my steps led me to my room. As I stood outside the door a voice called out saying, _"Come to me mama"_, and for a brief moment I thought it was calling for me. I entered the room and I saw a child; a little girl to be precise. She was sitting in the corner behind my bed and had her face hidden between her knees. She was crying and kept repeating that her mother didn't love and didn't want her with her. I hugged her and tried to comfort her, but she wouldn't listen no matter what I said, so I gave her the cup with the endelir I had prepared for you.

She raised her head and took it from my hands and then I could see a… a miniature of me with features from the both of us…

She had light brown hair with chocolate-brown hues and her eyes… her eyes were emerald with auburn tints. I was so bewildered…

But before I could think it twice she returned my gaze and called me mama, telling me that she wanted me to face the one I fear and then simply disappeared into thin air." Sakura at this point swallowed thickly and searched with uncertainty for the auburn eyes.

The elf met her gaze and saw her eyes shadowed with mist of anxiety, confusion and fright. Again, out of pure instinct his arms tightened their seize around her frame, offering her the refuge of protection she, so greatly, needed. And she, in return, allowed herself to drown into the solace his homely embrace so unconditionally was providing her.

"Am I becoming lunatic Syaoran-draug?" she whispered the words, her fingers clasping tightly the front of his blouse. She needed to hear that she was still sane; she needed it so much!

"No, of course not… "he stated firmly, shaking his head.

At the same moment the gears of his mind began granting, as he silently dwelled on the probabilities. Hearing noises from non-existent sources and interacting with entities that disappear. It all sounded likely, but why?

Sakura was a firmar; _a mortal_ human with no paranormal origin as far as he knew. So why was she able to hear the voices of those who remain veiled and see those who cannot be seen? Such ability was not achievable for any of the human race, unless…

Hope sprang into his very being, irrigating his whole entity with pure bliss at the mere thought of such gleeful possibility.

Firmars cannot develop any paranormal or spiritual ability unless the wise stars have given their blessings for a connection with an Eldar. In other words, the mortal had to be fated for an immortal. Sakura was indeed connected with someone of his race and he knew quite well who that someone was.

Seven years ago, when he was old enough -according to his kin's measures- to seek for his soul mate, the wise stars had revealed to his Dream who his Undomiel was. And the one he had seen all these years ago, was now standing in front of his , the answer to the riddle puzzling them both was fairly predictable, though unnoticed until that very moment: her gift was awakening.

But if her gift was awakening it meant that she… she…

Syaoran swallowed at the realization and felt his heart beating faster and faster as contentment ran through his veins. His auburn eyes focused once more on the face before him and saw the emerald eyes stare him confused at his sudden silence.

"Syaoran-draug what's wrong?"

His pensive and solemn expression softened at once.

"You are in the state of hälytin. Simply put, your gift is awakening." he announced, with a wide beam curving his lips.

Sakura though looked at him confused, not quite understanding the meaning of his words, various speculations running through her mind nevertheless. A gift? Namely as a present? But presents are mostly valuable, but nevertheless items of no consciousness. So if that were the case, how could an inert item awaken? She couldn't understand…

Yet, about hälytin she was not able to make an assumption, for she knew nothing regarding it. The word was foreign and confusing to her ears.

As if having heard her inner thoughts Syaoran laughed and shook his head in amusement. Sakura was always the one to try and figure things out on her own. Her thirst to know was one amongst the many qualities of hers which attracted him…

"It's not that kind of gift…"

"Then what is it?" the young woman inquired her curiosity and eagerness to know taking the better of her, momentarily causing her to forget about her qualms. Learning about something new always excited her.

"It is an ability given to you with the blessings of the sacred spirits and if my guess is right, you have the gift of hør. It means that you can hear the whispers of those unseen. You are a tilhører Sakura-loth, one of the few that can see and hear those who remain veiled to the many…" he explained, his smile never fading.

Sakura's curiosity now reached its peak. Her eyes were shinning with keenness to hear more.  
Syaoran was always the one to enlighten and share his knowledge with her. Also his lifelike and detailed stories about the ways of the Eldars always fascinated her. His natural skillfulness in speech was one amongst the many qualities of his which attracted her…

"But I'm not an elf like you or the others, so why would the sacred spirits bless me with a gift like the ones only the Eldars possess?"

"Because you are actually meant for one of them…"

"Meant?" the young woman inquired, her emerald eyes now clouded with clear confusion. His sayings were no doubt intriguing her, but she couldn't comprehend the meaning behind them so far.

Perhaps though there was more to be revealed and more for her to hear. And it seemed that Syaoran was nowhere near finished with his enlightenment, so out of pure intuition she knew that there ought to be more. She just did…

So she listened carefully as the elf began talking again.

"Since the time of his birth every male of our kin has a soul mate destined for him. Nevertheless, it all starts though as soon as he reaches adulthood. When he is old enough to seek out his counterpart the male has a Dream, what is called by the elders maur tiri; _the search of one's vision__**.  
**_In this dream the wise stars unveil to him who his mate is. Usually the male feels a natural pull to her. If not, his heart reawakens again and again so it can find its soul mate.

We name her Undomiel because to our eyes the beauty of our destined suitor rivals the light of the Evening Star, our most beloved star.  
Then the male has to walk around the lands in search for her. Nevertheless, it can take months and even years until he finally finds her, for the she can be one of our clan but she can also belong to the mortal race.

After he finds her, he claims her; namely, he conveys his feelings to her.  
If the female accepts the claim, she receives a gift from the sacred spirits. She does not realize its existence at first, but when she starts developing feelings of her own for her counterpart, the gift slowly awakens. It is what we name hälytin; _the state of awakening__**…"**_

The young woman nodded, finally understanding what Syaoran was trying to explain and as everything fell into place, it seemed so blatantly easy and simple to grasp…

But then, as she dueled more on what was just revealed to her, new issues arose to her mind. If everything she just learnt was true –which she had no reason to think otherwise- it pointed out that the male elf standing in front of her eyes had someone fated for him too.

A sharp pain pierced her heart at the mere thought of someone else at her Syaoran-draug's side. Syaoran said so himself, didn't he?

There is someone meant for every male elf since the time of his birth, so that consequently included him as well.

No means available to her was able to alter or simply avoid it. After all, who was she to defy the beliefs of the Eldars? Their values were more essential than a mere mortal like her. It was frustrating to admit, but there was no helping it as she sadly realized. The only issue left was to determine who the other female was…

Was she someone of his kin or was she of the mortal race? But then again, if there was indeed another what about his declaration of love towards her? Was it nothing more than an intended and well-performed lie? If she meant nothing to him, why would he lie to her in such a spiteful and hateful way? What was there for him to profit of by hurting her?

No. Syaoran wasn't a deceiver. She refused to accept that…

A person can be a talented actor, but no matter their capacity there is no one that can pretend genuine and heartfelt affection. Because affection is a pure emotion, that emanates straight from our hearts and one's heart discloses what lies within their soul.

The elf possessed an honest heart and he had proved her its truth and value more times than she could count. She should have realized it by now.  
As she should also be ashamed of herself for doubting him. Even if it was for just a second. Or two…

Her thoughts then shifted to something else he mentioned; the fact that she was meant for someone. If that was true, then what was his identity?

She couldn't quite put her finger to it.

The only males she had been interacting closely with were Syaoran and Wei. No one else had approached or claimed her. At least not as far as she was aware of. Except… except…

Except for Syaoran and his confession of love ten days ago.

Could she dare to think that it was the so called claim? She had thanked him for saying these three heartwarming words… It counted as acceptance, didn't it…?

After a few days she realized she was developing feelings for him and then began hearing the snivels. It was also just today that she saw little Xiao Mei. Could it be what he named hälytin?

Did all that mean that she… she… she was his predestined soul mate? He stated that the Undomiel could also belong to the mortal race, didn't he? Would it be a fool woman's hope to conclude that she was the one for him?

Sakura focused her attention back to him, gazing at the unending depths of his auburn eyes.

"What about you? Have you found your Undomiel yet?" she asked hesitantly and bit her lip nervously, not fully sure if she wanted to hear his answer.

"I have. A little less than four months ago, that is to say…" he replied and for a brief second saw distress in her eyes and felt her become slightly rigid against his arms. Without a second thought his hands fell to his sides, releasing her from his grasp and he drew back a step, stamping on a lower stair and gave her some personal space.

Sakura felt her heat shutter in pieces as she watched him recoiling. Did that mean that he longer wished to be near her? Her hands clenched into fists at her sides and she fought back the sudden urge to cry. She had to be strong. She had to see this through.

To make things clear. For him. For her. For both of their sakes.

"I know I'm being prying, but may I know who she is?" she asked again, dreading his answer.

Surprisingly her voice sounded calm and even. Inside her though, she was the exact opposite of tranquil. She felt the turmoil of sore emotions collide with the baffled thoughts, making her guts tighten.

Oh Kami-sama, what was she supposed to do if her speculation was mistaken and Syaoran was not meant for her but someone else after all?

Would she return to being a mere friend to him? If she ever was something more than that to be exact. Would she be able to endure such a possibility? She wasn't very confident about it.

There was one thing she knew for certain though; she would be lost and emotionally wrecked if Syaoran was predestined for some other female, because she loved him dearly. She loved him with every fiber and every molecule and every ounce of her being…

As she saw him looking at her equally bewildered, his lips parting to give her a response, she could only pray and hope with every ounce of her entity that his answer would be the one she longed to hear.

"Isn't it quite clear by now Sakura-loth?"

The elf was astounded, his bemused expression identical to hers. He was apparently mistaken to think that his feelings were reaching her by now. Her uneasy façade and her next wordslether qualms as well fears about the truth of his affections towards herslip.

"Please Syaoran-draug, I want to hear you say her name. Please…" the young woman pleaded, her voice almost cracking and the tears in her eyes ready to trickle on her cheeks.

Sakura was an insecure person, full of no self-confidence; he could see it clearly now. His earlier speech about the predestined soul mates must have contributed to bring her uncertainties back to life.

Her excellence as a female, his fated female, needed to be reassured; not only because it was his duty as her counterpart but because she was a person full of true grace. Becoming aware of her true worth was what she needed at that moment.

For her. For him. For both of their sakes he had to make things clear.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hi everyone! Long time no update, isn't it? I know it took me an awfully long time to update, but I had a lot of brainstorming to do for this chapter. So I wrote, I wrote and I wrote. I was nowhere near finishing this chapter though, so I decided to divide it into two parts. This was the first one. As for the second one it's half-written, but there are plenty of things to add and clarify so that everything will fall into place. I hope you can bare with me. Oh, I almost forgot...! I'm sure that you noticed that the Japanese and Elvish translations have disappeared from the bottom of the previous chapters. That's because I figured it would be easier for the readers to understand what is being said if I gave the translations right away. So I did. _In italics _of course and please have in mind that these parts are not being said by the characters. **They are only the translations of each word/phrase...**

**Further explanations:  
**

**common language: **in Lord of the Rings each race has its own language. But there's also one common language so that they can understand each other. In this fic think the common language as English and Japanese.

**draug: **elfish for wolf

**hør: **norwegian for listen

**tilhører: **norwegian for listener

**hälytin: **finnish for alert

Thank you for reading thus far and also reviewing and adding my story in your favourite/alert lists... It's so nice to know that people appreciate my work. Until my next update, minna... Ja ne!


	11. 9: Answers to Lead us forth Part II

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura. CLAMP does. I do own though the plotline of this story though...

* * *

**Chapter 9:  
Answers to Lead us forth  
_~~Part II~~_**

_To believe in yourself and your worth...  
__**That is the meaning of one's true strength...**_

For her and for his own self. For both of their sakes he had to make things clear and to do so he had to tell the tale from the very beginning.

It was a tale about two utterly different beings, an elf and a mortal. About how the two of them were brought together thanks to the will of the sacred spirits. It was a tale of great importance to him. It was their tale…

"Everything began to unfold seven years ago when I had my own Dream. My vision was about a young female with short light brown hair and bright emerald eyes. I was instantly fascinated by her as the ritual predicted and therefore I walked through the lands, seeking for her.

Her garment from my dream didn't resemble in any way the gowns of our women. It was a strange combination of equally odd pieces of clothing. A baggy pair of unusual cotton black informal trousers with two pockets on her right clave and the back side of her left thigh. And an also shapeless cotton white blouse with a hood and two thick black cords on the neckline. It was eccentric. And yet, it fit her flawlessly.

It made her look extraordinarily beautiful to my bemused eyes…

It was her unusual attire that made me realize that she was not one of the Eldars, but belonged to the mortal race. The difference between our origins drew me more to her. Without delay, I crossed dimension after dimension for a long, long time without any sign of luck. Until quite recently to be precise…

It was four months ago that faith led me to an urban, but small town in Japan.

A great mightiness pulled me to a native park. Its aura was strangely familiar and when I followed it I found myself in a secluded area.

Before I knew it a delicate scent surrounded me. So delicate and light that it reminded me of the sunrise dewdrops on silbellin petals.

Cinnamon and jasmine…

I saw a female sitting under a giant tree. A female that took my breath away. I thought I had strayed to a dream.

Her aura was oddly familiar and her resemblance to my Undomiel great. However, the young girl I envisioned about was no longer there. Instead, she had transformed to a young female with long brown hair. Only her eyes were the same; her emerald eyes…

A book was sitting on her lap and her expression was an odd mixture of maturity and curiosity. Her attention didn't shift from her reading material as she was too absorbed to actually notice my presence, to even notice the tears of sadness trickling from her eyes. At that moment in front of my eyes was a melancholic nymph. A dryad with shattered dynamism; an undine I knew I had to protect.

And yet, she was beautiful.

Far more beautiful than I remembered…

For the next few days I observed her as she came to the exact same place and sat under the exact same tree. She was always alone, wearing a false mask of strength and indifference. Despite her strong and remote façade though, I could sense her lonesomeness.

Sometimes she attempted to deceive her loneliness by writing to a special book she always carried with her or by talking to the tree. Sometimes she even sought advice from it. Her efforts were pointless though.

As the days came and went, I observed her falling apart and my heart bled for her desolation. She needed someone to talk to. Someone to lend her a shoulder to cry on. Someone to be simply there for her. I decided to be that someone.

One afternoon on the early September I summoned every speck and every ounce of my gallantry and decided to speak to her. It was the afternoon that the rest of my life began to alter…

I was nervous. Nervous beyond nervous. My heart was beating frantically against my ribcage and I was quite certain that she could hear its loud pounding as well. I saw her peaceful expression changing to an overwhelmed one as she finally registered my presence and watched her stepping away from me, nearly shrieking as she established some distance between us. I was hurt, but didn't blame her for her reaction.

Instead, I clarified that my intentions weren't suspicious. Needless to say, but she didn't believe my words.

She kept her distance and warily asked me for my name. I answered without hesitation. But once I inquired about hers, her answer was that she wasn't convinced by my reliability. Laughing at her exaggerated cautiousness, my answer was that I was a very reliable person. She said I was stubborn. I didn't deny it.

After that little exchange, everything went as dreadful as possible.

I wrongly teased her about her secrecy, asking her foolishly why she was being so guarded; I should have known better than that.

It was only justifiable when she lost her tolerance with me and bitterly spat that it was none of my business. That was my first mistake…

Feeling ashamed of myself I apologized, saying I was wrong to meddle in foreign affairs and saw her fuming expression settle down within mere moments. It's needless to say, but I was astounded…

For a few awkward minutes neither she nor me said anything else, until the inquisitiveness I had witnessed not many weeks ago kicked in. She was curious to know what I was doing there and more so, on the tree.

Admitting directly that I was observing her was my second mistake…

Her momentarily fallen shields rose up to the sky and even beyond that once more and she eyed me suspiciously and with a bit of fear. I felt no less than a measly stalker at that moment.

Her emerald eyes eyed me even more fretfully when I said I found her fascinating. She raised a questioning brow and wanted to know what exactly was so interesting about her. I told her my honest thoughts.

I told her I saw her coming to that place day after day with no other company than that special book of hers. I told her I listened as she sought advice from the tree every now and then. I told her I could sense the aloneness that was so well hidden beneath her mask of apathy. I told her I saw that same loneliness haunting her eyes more and more every day. At that precise moment her eyes were gleaming not only with aloneness but also twinkles of tears.

Hesitantly, I stepped towards her direction and my hand instinctively reached for her tears. I wiped them away and saw her relax slightly under my touch. I told her she didn't have to cry anymore…

She looked at me through taken aback eyes and asked me why I was treating her so kindly. It was my turn to be taken aback.

It was as though she hadn't known any kind of compassion during her life. Explaining that the reason was because of my feelings towards her mere moments after our first interaction was final and most grave mistake…

In a matter of less than a few seconds everything went to its downfall.

My hand was pushed away and new tears sprang into her eyes.

Hearing her denying the seriousness of my emotions hurt me. It hurt me so much. But between the two of us she was the one in more pain. She was afraid to trust my words.

Afraid of me…

Again, I didn't blame her. I blamed me. Only me.

I could only observe as she turned her back and ran away. Away from the tree. Away from the park. Away from me…

She was far in hardly any seconds and even though her silhouette was only a dot in the distance, I could hear her snivels flying through the air. My heart broke to thousands of pieces. She was upset and it was entirely my fault.

But even though I was the one at fault, I had to make sure she returned home safely. My conscience wouldn't let me rest otherwise.

And so I followed her…

Now I realize this was something only a stalker would do and maybe, just maybe, I was one. But only in this case. And only for her…

Upon arriving to a residence I assumed was her home, I saw a light coming from a window on the second floor. I could sense her presence there.  
That certain windowpane was located at the right side of the house, right above the backyard. A sakura-tree was growing right in the middle with grass bellow. A few bushes with roses were scattered here and there.

A branch of the tree was longer than the rest and that certain twig was reaching to the lightened pane. It must have been fate's work…

Climbing on a tree was never a difficult task for me so I clambered on the trunk effortlessly and got on that certain bough. The sight my eyes witnessed made my heart flutter.

She was sleeping. Her peaceful expression reminded me of a nymph. She was thankfully safe. And yet, I sensed nervousness, doubt, sadness and confusion emanating from her sleeping figure. She was still troubled and it was my entire fault…

I knew I had to ask for forgiveness. I knew I had to make things right.

The next day I went back to the park and waited several hours for her to appear. I waited until dusk but she did not come. I wasn't going to let myself be discouraged though.

I had spent seven whole years searching for her. Waiting a day or two for her arrival could not hurt me. And so I kept waiting…

But even if I was willing to wait, a week passed and there was still no sign of her. It was worrying. It was nerve-racking. But above anything else, it was fearsome. It was daunting because of a nightmare that haunted my sleep.

I was dreaming about her. She was riding Brego and I was observing as they both ran away from me. I was unable to move, unable to do something to prevent them from abandoning me. I could only watch. Watch as they fled further and further away. Watch as her figure gradually faded from my horse's back. It was intimidating because I didn't want to lose anyone else precious to me ever again.

I was losing faith…

Almost two weeks after our disastrous first interaction, when everything seemed utterly lost, fate made its wondrous miracle.

On the twelfth day, she came back…

I happened to be asleep upon her arrival; in fact that very same nightmare haunted my dream yet again.

Brego was once more fleeing and she was sitting on his back, looking back and waving cheerfully at me. Her figure was slowly fading over again. Unable to stop them; I let the tears trickle from my eyes. But then, something astounding occurred.

I felt a feathery caress of comfort on my cheek and then I was illuminated by a warm white light that embraced me with its brightness. The next moment my eyes slowly opened as I was pulled out of the dream, only to be caught into another one. A genuine one.

A dream where my nymph was right in front of me.

Afraid that my eyes were deceiving me, I caught the hand that was close to my face and pulled her to me. My heart began racing upon the realization. She was real…

She was more than startled from the sudden embrace and struggled frantically for her freedom. My arms only tensed and tightened their grasp on her. I whispered into her ear that I thought I lost her. That I thought she disappeared. I could sense her confusion, but even so she ceased to struggle and her next words made my heart skip a beat. She told me she wouldn't disappear.

Her words were so comforting and her voice was full of no hatred towards me. Instead, it sounded concerned…

Reluctantly, I allowed my arms to drop from around her, letting her gain her freedom once more. To my greatest surprise, she didn't flee.

She didn't disappear, just like she promised…

That was the moment I was waiting for.

I retreated a bit from her personal space and took a deep breath, trying to calm my nervousness and then… I asked for her forgiveness from the depths of my racing heart. All kind of thoughts coursed through my mind as I awaited her condemning or redemptive decision.

It only took her mere moments to reply, but it seemed like an eon to me.

To my greatest surprise she said that there was nothing to forgive…

Just like that. She gave me absolution for my faults.

In return, I promised never to say unnecessary or thoughtless words again. That was the day my whole life altered. That was the day I silently swore that I wouldn't allow myself to waste the opportunity she gave me…"

Up until that moment Sakura was absorbing every word the elf uttered. Then there was silence. Sheer silence as he ceased talking.

It was awfully familiar. Everything he revealed thus far sounded so awfully familiar. Every ounce of his words…

It was as though he was narrating a story. A story unlike others. It was as though he was narrating the story of their meeting. A story she would never regret being part of. And Sakura noticed his eyes.

Whilst talking about his predestined person his eyes were glimmering with happiness. Even now that he merely breathed in and out, his eyes were filled with so much affection. The exact same warmth that was evident every time he looked at her. Oh dear Kami-sama, was she foolishly raising her hopes up?

Please, don't let it be.

Just for this one time let the inkling that dwelled deep inside her heart be unfailing. Just this once…

It was an egoistic wish though, she knew it very well. And yet she wanted to be selfish. Only this one time.

She was uncertain if she wanted to hear the rest of his story even if she hesitantly reached out and tugged his sleeve; silently urging him to continue, not trusting the steadiness of her own voice.

And then Sakura saw them. Saw his eyes shimmer with warmth once more as he gladly did as she wordlessly bade him to.

"In the days that followed our reunion I learnt more, so much more about her. In return, I spoke about myself. Never did I mention though the true nature of my origin. Afraid that she would run away once more if I did, I only revealed vague information about my motherland.

I was deceiving her faith on me, I was well aware of that, but at the same time I wasn't willing to risk losing her again, possibly once and for all.

As the days passed one after the other I found myself noticing every little detail about her and getting increasingly taken with it. The brown tresses that adorned her face and cascaded from her shoulders. The emerald eyes that shone brighter than the sun. The way her eyebrows furrowed when she was skeptical. The way her lips curved when she smiled. The way she concentrated when in thought and the way she uttered every word when she talked. And thusly, whereas learning so much more about her, I found myself getting more and more taken with her.

Many daylights have elapsed since that day, but not a single one of them has lessened the intensity of my feelings for her. I was, and still am, taken with everything about her.

I will never forget the first time she uttered my given name.  
That moment is forever engraved in my memories, never to be forgotten. Her voice resonated to my ears like a celestial melody that pouredfrom the skies. A song sung from the dryads. I felt as though I was reborn.

Up until then, it was the happiest moment of my entire life…

But it was only one of the many blissful moments I shared with her. I knew for certain that more would arrive.

That day I took the most life-altering decision I ever had until that moment, crossing every line of acceptable familiarity between us; to ask her to follow me back in my mother-land.

Between the two of us she was the most reasonable, so it came as no surprise when I was told she had to think about her family first.

What came as a surprise though was when in the end she asked for some time to consider my suggestion. I was happy beyond happy. I told her I could and would wait for her decision even if I had to wait my entire life…

That night we parted ways as usual; she waved goodbye and departed and I lingered behind until her outline disappeared from my view.

I remember the hours that followed clearly. I had no sleep at all.

The gears of my mind were granting, causing it to overflow with thoughts. Thoughts of her. Thoughts of her and me. Thoughts of our life together.

Thoughts of the future.

The hours of the darkness went by with unhurried tardiness as though bewitched to torment me with their torturous antics. It was in the early morning hours when the sun awoke and the first rays touched the lands beneath that I fell asleep. As my eyes finally lost the battle with consciousness, I was embraced by a dream of provision. I dreamt about her and me. I dreamt about the future.

Our future.

In my dream we had two daughters. Two twin daughters. They were the spitting image of their mother. Same hair and same eyes. We were all sitting under a willow, listening to their mother narrate the story of Ardehel, the White Lady of Estelle that gave her love to Tuor, a man of the mortal race. It was a lovely spectacle to behold.

I was so warm inside when I woke up…

When the time to meet again came I was happy, but also nervous.

I was nervous beyond nervous because ordinary dreams are only a plausible side of reality that may or may not turn into actuality. The rule applies with more importance to the dreams of provision.

The minutes slipped away and my restlessness only grew thicker. I knew that only one day had elapsed since my life-altering suggestion had been made, but I couldn't help it. I needed to know. To learn if she had given any thought to my offer. My anxiety only grew thicker; until I saw her that is. She was there.

A few meters away from me, carrying luggage with her. It could mean one thing and one thing only. She was coming with me.

Even so I needed to hear it. I needed to hear her say it herself. And when she did I felt my heart threaten to burst. Not from anguish or grief, but bliss; immense, endless and pure bliss. Only that.

The future had never shone brighter than it did that day.

Moments after our arrival at Estelle she discovered my true origin. It came as no surprise when she held some reservation to the revelation. To my greatest surprise though, she wanted to touch my ears.

I still remember her fascinated expression. The curious fingers. The soft touch. The rosy colour that tinted her cheeks. The sound of our racing heartbeats. My heart threaten to explode once more. Everything. It was one of our most intimate moments.

This was when life as I previously knew it ceased to be and just like that our mutual lives began.

The soreness due to the loss of so many innocent was still unhealed. The resentment was still tormenting my core and _Erin en Gurth_ was a shattering anniversary for me. Until the last ceremony to be exact.

Her heartening company was all the remedy needed for the soreness to cure. I still grieve for the lost, but she aided me to conquer every ounce of bitter feeling. In this year's ceremony I did something I had never done before. I performed the final lament.

I never felt more alive than that moment in the past.

My deceased parents appeared before us at the end of the ceremony.

I could not believe in my eyes. The words my father told me are still deeply imprinted in my mind:

_'Be brave. Be brave for her and for yourself'._

I realized just then that if I wanted to be truly strong, if I truly wanted to protect her, I had to let go of the past and live for the future.

Our future.

And so I did. I let go of my grim recollections and emotions. I have never felt more allayed in my life than that exact moment.

The opportunity to fulfill my aim and care for her didn't take long to come.

During the hours of the darkness she was haunted. Not by a phantom, but a nightmare. As I learnt later on, a terrible event of the past was disturbing the peacefulness of her dreams. I recall spending the nights beside her, singing a lullaby to pacify her. A lullaby naneth taught me.

Two great things happened on the day I found out about this hidden truth.

The first is that I summoned every ounce of my gallantry and made known the true nature of my feelings towards her. I still remember vividly the brisk beat of my heart when she accepted them.

The second is that after my profession she trusted me enough so as to expose to me her darkest secret.

I was enraged when I heard about the brutal beast that caused her nightmares to begin. I still am. And I am prepared to end him with my bare hands, if she wishes me to. Even if it costs me my life. Because nothing is more important to me than she.

That day I once more took an oath to shield her from every threat this world holds; even if it is my own self. Because I'd rather end my life than harm her. Because nothing else is more precious to me in this vast world we live in than she. Than you, my Sakura-loth.

Because the one I dreamt about, the one that stole my breath away, the one I swore to protect, the one my heart beats fast for, is you Sakura-loth. Only you. Now and forever, if you will let me…"

There was silence once the elf's valiant words were uttered.

Silence as his last words dawned to her. Silence as awareness slowly befell upon her. Silence as her face beamed with excitement. Silence as her eyes gleamed with glee. Silence as her whole entity glistened with euphoria and glinted brighter than the sun.

Silence as he waited for the much wanted answer.

There it was.

Hanging on the edge of her lips as she was about to respond.

And yet…

His conscience kept distressing him, indicating that it wasn't the right time. He knew it but even so… even so to hear her reply was what he longed and sought for. And yet…

It didn't feel right.

The current circumstances were emotionally charged and thus her answer would be forced and biased and he didn't seek for that. He sought it to be heartfelt and spoken from the depths of her very core.

She was speechless. Speechless as his last much needed words dawned to her. Speechless as every fiber, every molecule and every ounce of her entity was warmed up by newfound excitement. An unprecedented excitement.

The kind of enthusiasm that caused her rosy cheeks to flush in crimson. The kind of enthusiasm that caused her pounding heart to beat faster than any other time. The one and only enthusiasm when love blossomed.

It was a miracle.

To have her egoistic desire granted. To hear the words her core most longed for. A wonder like no other.

It was as though she had been waiting for it for her entire life and now…Now it was finally here and she could let it happen. But it was also his.

Yes…

It was their miracle. The moment for mutual understanding to finally take over was here at last.

No more secrets. No more misunderstandings. No more doubts.

She was his as he was hers. For now and forever.

It was proper now. To give him the answer he longed for.

It was there. Hanging from the tip of her lips, begging to be spoken. And spoken it would be as she held no more fears in her heart.

"_A-Anata no koto, s_… A-About you, I l…"

But she was cut off, even as her hand had let go of his sleeve and timidly flew upwards, in search for something.

Within mere seconds her palm was in his and she could only watch as he brought their hands to his mouth.

"Not right now. Not like this…" he whispered as his lips barely touched her fingers, tenderly brushing over the top of her nails and applied a gentle kiss on them.

The hidden meaning behind his act caused her cheeks to flush.

It was a sign of devotion; a servant obeying their lord. He was hers as she was his. For now and forever.

A coy smile curved her lips and she nodded in understanding.

Syaoran was right. Right now was not the time after all as it would seem rushed and strained due to their current circumstances. No.

She didn't seek for that. She sought it to be heartfelt and uttered when she wouldn't be able to do differently. Only then it would be perfect…

"I don't want you to think that my answer is the result of any kind of compulsion, so I will wait. I will wait for the moment my heart won't be able to do otherwise. But until then, let's go inside …"

Nothing more was uttered as they ascended the marble steps side by side, their fingers securely entwined together.

Later that night and after having eaten dinner, they spent some more time together. To the cooking-room, where they attempted to aid Wei wash the tableware but ended up splashing water at each other and created a mess all around them.

The elder elf laughed at their juvenile and joyful antics and dismissed them from his sanctuary, saying politely and with a hint of mischief that he would not forgive the two if they actually managed to demolish the room with only water. The youth should occupy themselves with more fascinating activities, as he put it.

The pair listened to his advice and left the room, deciding to wander around the house.

To the lengthy corridors that light was shed on them by charcoal lanterns made of metal and glass which were placed opposite of the half-rounded windows and hanging on the walls by two metal arches of the same colour that entwined with each other.

The light that was coming from the spiral gapes of each lantern was deriving from ithildin, a miraculous substance created by the Eldars from the droplets of the first rain and petals of black orchids. It only mirrored moonlight and starlight.

To the library where they both picked a book to read before going to sleep.

They strolled around the house for a little longer, until their feet led them in front of the young woman's door.

Just before stating their nightly farewells and wishes for sweet and peaceful dreams, Sakura summoned every ounce of her valor and did the one thing she desired since the day she acknowledged the true nature of her feelings towards the elf standing in front of her.

"Today I was not able to say it but someday I will for sure, so wait for me Syaoran-draug…" she whispered and without further thought got to her toes, reaching for him once more.

Led by nothing more than her instincts, she timidly met his lips and lightly brushed hers upon them, placing a chaste kiss on them.

It was a pure touch. Soft and gentle. Like a feathery caress. It lasted merely a fraction and perhaps lesser than a blink of an eye.

And then it was gone.

"This is yours and it will always be…"

Her whispered words followed soon after, forming an oath. A sign to seal her promise. A promise she intended to keep…

"I will wait. No matter how long it takes. I will wait for you Sakura-loth because I'm solely yours. Now and forever…"

Both of them were in high spirits. Delighted beyond delighted.

But it was not meant to last long because their bliss was sullied by the initial cause of their conversation. A cause they both decided to simply overlook for the moment. Because hitsuzen was about to knock on their doors the very same night…

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hi everyone! Long time no update, I know. Here's the second part of the nineth chapter. Nothing major happened here, but at last we are able to see the so far events from Syaoran's point of view. I think it is important so that the plot will develop further from here. Also here's a piece of advice: have in mind the content of his dream of provision... *hint*  
Ahem, that is all I think...

**Further explanations:**

**ithildin: **according to Tolkien, ithildin was a substance made by the dwarfs from mithril. I didn't know though if everyone was aware of what mithril was however and so I improvised.

**hitsuzen: **inevitable

If you want to see what the lamps hanging on the corridors look like, visit this link: **_http: / / www. americanbecca. com / assets / product _ images / product _ lib / 38000 - 38999 / 38566 . jpg _**(just remove the spaces for the URL to work properly)

And finally if you want to see what a black orchid looks like, visit this link: **_http: / / img15 . / PA01084 / 894 / product / 37815570 . jpg ? 20111212150404_** (again, remove the spaces for the URL to work properly)


	12. 10: The Truth that Lies into Her Dream

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura. CLAMP does. I do own though the plotline of this story though...

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Quenya or Sindarin. These two elfish dialects belong to their rightful owner, Tolkien.

* * *

**Chapter 10: ****The Truth that lies into her Dream**

**-xx-**

There was nothing around her apart from menacing darkness. Solid, unlit darkness…

Treads were heard from somewhere in the distance. Treads that approached her slowly. Despair and grief overwhelmed her as a faint cloaked outline advanced towards her. Nearer and nearer. Tears stung her eyes. There was something peculiar about these tears though. Something different.

These tears… these tears weren't hers…

Soft snivels hovered through the air and a low hum reached her ears. It was a barely audible voice. A hardly noticeable whisper. But it was there, pleading for someone to notice its existence. It was poignant. It was mournful and it was heartbreaking to hear. But it was there, pleading for someone to heal its suffering. And there was something distant but nevertheless, eerily familiar about it…

She wasn't entirely sure what it was though. It was something inexpressible that called to her. To notice it. To reach for it.

In the background, a lamenting song was accompanying the scarcely audible voice. She had heard it once before. So forlorn and yet so beautiful…

The lyrics were the same as before, bringing her so much anguish. Anguish for someone lost. For someone she had yet to meet…

_Uich gwennen na 'wanath ah na dhín.  
An uich gwennen na ringyrn ambar hen.  
Boe naid bain gwannathar,  
Boe cuil ban firitha._

_Boe naer gwannathach."_

Soon after another lamenting song filled the darkness of her dream. A mourn sang with the one voice she had grown so fond of hearing. The deep voice. The gentle voice. The comforting voice. And yet, it was now coated with endless sorrow. Sorrow for someone dear. Sorrow for someone lost.

_"I ngîl cennin erthiel  
Ne menel aduial,  
Ha glingant be vîr  
Síliel moe._

_I ngîl cennin firiel  
Ne menel aduial,  
And-dúr naun i fuin a galad firn  
Naegriel moe._

_An i natha  
An i naun ului  
A chuil, ann-cuiannen."_

And when the lament ended, her surroundings were bathed in bright light. So bright, that it nearly blinded her eyes until she got accustomed to its intensity. Scenes of various events started to unravel before her eyes.

Events that had yet to happen.

To say she was bewildered would be an understatement. Sooner than she could register what was happening, a voice pierced her thoughts. It was the same as before. A barely audible voice. A soft voice.

A child's voice…

_"Mama. It hurts mama. Mama please, make it stop."_

Anguish and sorrow. The low voice was bursting with them. And yet… Yet there was a little hint of hope in it. Just a very small clue of faith that someone would notice. Notice and heal its torment…

She tried to talk. To ask why the voice was hurting, but it was pointless.

The words faded in her throat, dying on her lips as she urged them to come forth. It was as though she was voiceless and it unnerved her. Frightened her to no end. But she did not give up…

Her effort was useless once more. The result was the same when she tried to channel the thought through her mind.

No response was given to her…

Vain. It was all vain. She felt helpless, but refused to give up. A tug to her nightdress shifted her attention to the cloaked outline.

It was such a small figure; surely it belonged to a child. And then she noticed them. Noticed the piercing eyes that stared at her through the hood. The pair of eyes that was so similar to hers.

Now she understood why the voice was so familiar. It was because it belonged to the little child that through tear-stained eyes pleaded for her help. The little child that was a miniature of herself.

Xiao Mei…

As though having read her thoughts, the soft voice rang into her mind before she could try to ask any questions.

"_Mama will see. Mama will understand…"_

And then the scenes began flashing in front of her eyes once again. Scenes of events that had yet to happen.

The environment they found themselves in was unknown to her. She could tell it was a bedroom though and judging by the furnishings decorating it, a child's bedroom. The walls were painted with a calming forest-green color. Right in the middle of the room there were placed two wooden cribs and on the wall behind them was painted an aged tree. It was a willow with dark olive-green leaves and russet branches that spread across the other three walls.

Voices echoed into the room.

The sound was faint, coming from outside through the open french window. Her curiosity took over in an instant, causing her legs to pace towards the wooden window panes and walk past them. The place she found herself in was a rather spacious balcony that viewed the most beautiful landscape bathed in sunlight she had ever seen. There was a daybed in its center.

To her greatest astonishment two versions of herself and his were resting on it; two fairly diverse versions of their current selves. An even bigger shock was the differences she distinguished between her current self and the one she saw in front of her.

Not because she seemed older, but because of her potential physique.**  
**

Her alternate version possessed sleek golden-brown hair that reached to her ribs and small ringlets were adorning the edges. Her eyes were still their usual hue of emerald. There was a difference in them however as a beautiful shadow of sea-green streaks embellished them now. And then were her ears.

Just like his, two slightly pointed on the edge ears were shyly emerging through the waterfall that was her hair.

The biggest surprise of them all though was neither the hair nor her eyes. Not even the pair of barely pointed ears. It was something entirely different. Something that caused her to gasp in bewilderment.

Her eyes were wide and before she knew it her hands her covering her mouth. But no one seemed to notice her sudden intake of breath. No one except for the little girl. But even the child remained silent, saying absolutely nothing.

A strange feeling of longing spread through her veins as she continued to watch the scene unfolding before her eyes.

Her attention shifted to him and she could feel her heart flutter for a fraction as her eyes took in this alternate appearance of him.

The shade of his hair was the same warm chocolate-brown. The sole difference was that now it was slightly longer. A small ponytail tied with a red string was resting on the nape of his neck. His bangs were the same even though they were swept sideways now and a single silver hair clip held them in place, allowing his mild eyes to gaze unhindered at the other her with the same amount of warmth she knew them.

Time had treated him generously as he didn't appear a day older than she knew him to be…

And then, there was a slight change to his aura. True the elements of gentleness and calmness were there as always, but she could also feel an air of maturity and wisdom.

He was the same and yet different. So much different. And yet, those differences were the ones that emphasized his masculinity.

He was more handsome than ever…

In silent understanding with her other self, his head came to nestle upon her abdomen almost casually, as though it was the most natural thing in the entire world. In an instant her fingers were within his brown tresses, caressing heedlessly the ever tousled locks as a small grin curved her lips.

It was a sweet sight to behold…

The small grin that adorned her lips mirrored the one of her other self. Just that moment the familiar warmth began journeying through her veins and coating every fiber, every molecule and every ounce of her very being. And when Sakura became aware of the softness of his tresses tickling her pads as well and the weight of his head pressing against her tummy too, her heartbeat hastened. It seemed that she shared some kind of linkage with her other self…

She had no time to feel stunned nevertheless.

A tug to her nightdress brought her reverie to an end and caused her attention to shift to the cloaked child. The same bright emerald eyes stared at her through the hood shimmering; shimmering with translucent beads of tears.

She had no time to question the little girl nevertheless as the scene before her eyes continued to unfold. The gentle whisper of his voice softly resonated into her ears, causing her hurriedly beating heart to flutter. It was the same mildness and benevolence she knew.

"I can hear them…" he announced, his voice full of hardly masked delight and auburn eyes reflecting excitement.

But she could only hear him and no other source of sound. Not even the response of her other self as something implausible occurred to her. Something stirred within her…

To say she was bewildered would be a lie because she was not startled. Not in the least. It was agitation and fright what she was feeling.

There was no explanation based on reason to adequately justify this queer sensation in her tummy. Or nearly none. Because there was one. One that was logic enough, but it was the most idiotic and preposterous idea she ever had…

Again, a gentle tug to her nightdress caused her reverie to come to an abrupt end. As her attention shifted back to the scene in front of her eyes, a small comforting palm grasped hers, its warmth enveloping her bigger hand.

A brief moment of complete silence followed. Silence as his heightened senses focused on the sound only he could hear. At first there was nothing to be heard. Absolutely nothing but sheer silence. And then it happened…

A faint sound resonated in her ears. A sound that resembled a…

His voice resonated into her ears breaking her reverie and at the same time confirming her incomplete thought.

"I can hear their heartbeats…" he whispered, a gentle grin curving his lips as he listened to the unwavering pulsing of two small hearts.

She could hear it too. Clearer this time…

It was so faint, almost barely noticeable if you weren't aware of its existence.

And yet…

It was there, beating steadily. An unyielding proof. A telltale to the existence of two minuscule little beings. It seemed in the end that her notion was not as unrealistic as she initially thought. It seemed that there was one, or rather two specks of truth in it…

But then it was gone, disappearing as unexpectedly as it came. A strange feeling of loss overwhelmed her. And then the scene before her eyes vanished, the colors around her evaporating into nothingness.

In a matter of mere moments there was darkness everywhere. Thick, unlit darkness that fogged her eyesight. But it didn't only cloud her eyesight. Together with uncertainty, it crawled into her veins at its own leisure pace…

Suddenly she was falling into nothingness. The ground crumbled under her feet and she fell deeper and deeper into the bottomless pits of the abyss. Or so she thought…

Yet, there was one thing. One little thing that ended unexpectedly her continuous downfall. It was the small palm that grasped her bigger hand tightly. Its comforting warmth, encouraged and reminded her that she wasn't all alone. And soon light shone above them, illuminating the world beneath brightly.

This time they found themselves in the middle of a garden. Something about it was vaguely familiar.

There were two little children chasing one another around it. Two identical little girls that were in fact twin sisters.

Both of the little sisters were blessed with tangled golden-brown hair that fell beneath their shoulders. Among their messy locks were hidden a few chocolate-hued tresses. They were just like two droplets of water. Pure and heartening.

Telling them apart wouldn't be effortless if it weren't for the color of their eyes. The blend of colors that was so alike. And yet so different.  
The older sister was the one with eager emerald with auburn tints eyes and the younger sister was the one with intense auburn with emerald tints eyes.

They were like two droplets of water. Pure and heartening to watch…

Their merry voices and joyful laughs echoed throughout the entire yard. Maybe even beyond that.

She felt really warm inside, just by watching them…

"Su-chan, Su-chan…!" one of them called to her sister.

"Wait for me, Mei nee-chan…!" the second answered back to her older sister.

"Woaa, Su-chan you must see this...!" the first exclaimed from her favorite hiding place; the parterre with the purple with fuchsia tones lilies.

"What is it, what is it…?" the other asked curiously and even though she wasn't a fast sprinter like her sister, dashed to her twin.

She found her sitting on the knees, her face close to the petals of a blossom, excitedly examining a tiny, barely noticeable, creature on it.

"Look, look…! It's a ladybug, a white one…!" the older twin exclaimed excitedly, her eyes shining with glee and enthusiasm. It was a rare finding after all…

"How pretty…" the younger twin marveled the minuscule creature in awe, her eyes shining with joy and excitement similar to her sister's.

_'As expected from Mei nee-chan…'_ the little girl thought with pride.

The rest of their conversation faded away and their cheerful laughs were no longer audible as the scene altered to a different one.

The sky darkened again and this time was covered by ominous black clouds. The earth wobbled by consecutive thunders and soon the sky was pierced by bright streaks of lightnings. Soon it began to rain and it was a terrible storm. But among the deafening riot echoed another sound. A softer one.

It was a barely noticeable whimpering. So low and yet so wistful. But there was another that also knew of its existence. Another, apart from her, that tried to ease its anguish.

The voice that echoed through the tumult was gentle, but also low-voiced. Hushed, as though afraid to disturb the rest of the world.

"I'm here. I'm here, it's alright…"

It was the same as every other night this past year. Her little sister was in pain. Being twins meant that she was able to feel the hurt which was consuming her sister in a slow, torturous pace.

"It hurts. It really hurts, nee-chan!"

The distress in her sister's voice only confirmed that which she could already feel. She could feel it so unmistakably and yet…

And yet she was unable to protect her little sister from it; unable to end it.

"Mama will wake up soon and it will be fine…"

Words of understanding. Words of false optimism. She could only offer them. Deep down though she knew it was hopeless. The night after would be the same and the night after that. And even the night after that. It was an endless loop.

If only she were a more powerful yumemi;_ a more powerful dream-seer…_

"Please, make it stop. Please nee-chan!"

"It will be alright, Su-chan. I promise…"

But then the riot ended, the faint voices fading away along with it and in their stead took place a heartbreaking wail. Sakura looked around, searching for its origin. She found nothing though. All was dim…

But then she looked down at the cloaked child and saw how her whole body shook. Saw and heard. Heard the sniffles that left her lips.

Something inside Sakura stirred.

It wasn't common sense what led her to console the little girl. It was instinct. The kind of instinct she knew a mother possessed. Although, she couldn't bring herself to care why she felt like a mother would at that moment. In an instant she was on her knees, her hand reaching instinctively for the hood that veiled the child's face from her. She met no resistance and when her fingers gripped the fabric pulled it back, revealing a familiar face.

Xiao Mei…

Her nearly identical emerald eyes were shimmering with translucent beads of tears. Again, Sakura felt something inside her stir.

"What's wrong Mei-chan?"

The child didn't answer immediately as though afraid of something. And indeed she was afraid. Afraid of what would happen if she told the truth. Sakura could see the fear, curving her young features. See and sense it as it clawed the little girl's insides.

Gently, she brought a hand to the identical, even though younger, face and cupped her cheek, her fingers wiping the tears from the nearly alike emerald eyes. When she spoke, her voice was soft and gentle. Like a mother's.

"Why are you crying?"

Instead of an answer, she heard a lament. It was the same poignant song with before. The same deep, but gentle voice was reciting it.

_"I ngîl cennin erthiel  
Ne menel aduial,  
Ha glingant be vîr  
Síliel moe._

_I ngîl cennin firiel  
Ne menel aduial,  
And-dúr naun i fuin a galad firn  
Naegriel moe._

_An i natha  
An i naun ului  
A chuil, ann-cuiannen."_

She didn't manage to ask any sort of question nevertheless because as soon as she tried to talk, a streak of lightning pierced the sky and illuminated her surroundings. It was soon followed by another one and another one.

It didn't take long to realize that this time she was in a cemetery, but she was not alone. Xiao Mei was there with her.

But there were also three other figures dressed in dark clothes there. Soon enough, she recognized that the ones before her eyes belonged to the alternate versions of Syaoran and herself. To her surprise though, the third and smallest of them all belonged to the child standing beside her.

Xiao Mei…

The lament had long ended and in its stead angry voices were resonating in the air. Yet among them there was distinctively apparent a faint weeping. A weeping she remembered hearing once more. Sakura felt once more something stir inside her…

"Everything is your fault!"

A voice, that even though slightly different than she knew it to be, but still awfully familiar, wept. That voice belonged to her alternate self.

"Lower your voice. Today is a day of grieve and not hatred."

A voice, that even though slightly different than she knew it to be, but still awfully familiar, countered. That voice belonged to his alternate self.

Her other self nevertheless, ignored her Syaoran and continued her accusatory speech, acting as though he hadn't spoken at all.

"If I hadn't gone to that park that day. If I hadn't met you, none of this would have happened! If I hadn't returned. I-if I hadn't forgiven you, everything would be fine!"

"You regret it then? You regret everything we've been through until this day? Even telling me that you love me?"

His words were pained. Sakura could feel the sadness in them. She could feel them pierce her heart like a dagger as though they were directly spoken to her. And yet his voice was fairly heated.

She had never heard him use that tone before.

Her other self nonetheless remained unaffected, as though his words had no impact on her. Sakura wondered how it could even be possible…

"I regret every single moment. Meeting you, forgiving you, letting you get closer to me, getting to know you, letting you kiss me and then kissing you back, telling you that I love you, letting you touch and make love to me. Still, most of all I regret giving birth to your bastards!"

"Watch your language."

"Don't tell me how to speak!"

"If you're displeased, you may leave this place. Go back to where you came from…"

"Trust me, I would if I could!"

And it was true. She had tried to leave many times. But the result was always the same fruitless outcome. No matter how many times she tried to summon the Gate of the Elves, it wouldn't appear in front of her. Because the Gate only showed itself to those who truly wish to travel and deep down she didn't want to leave Estelle. She didn't want to leave her daughter and Syaoran. No. She didn't despite her heated words…

Tears haunted her eyes and Sakura could feel them streaming down from her own eyes as well. And just like that, she knew that it was only the sorrow speaking for her alternate self. The little child that watched her mama and papa argue right in front of her eyes however, did not…

Her soft voice was a barely audible whisper when spoke, pleading her parents to stop their bickering.

"Mama. Papa. Don't fight, please…"

The response she received from her mother though made her little heart a wreck and almost caused it to break from the ache.

"Silence! You are at fault as well! If you had told me sooner I would have gone back and your sister would still be alive. You knew her powers as a yumemi allowed her to undergo the dreamer's feelings, unlike yours. You knew her health was weak because of it. Yet you did nothing to help her! You don't deserve to have her face. You don't deserve to be my daughter. I don't want to see you in front of me anymore. Just disappear!"

Sakura's eyes widened as soon as the spiteful words were spoken.

If she were calmer, she would be more shocked by the realization that her hunch was right after all. But at that moment she could only process one thing. How could her other self be so much mean? How could she be so much harsh and bitter to her own daughter?

She could remember forming an oath to herself years ago. That if she once had children of her own, she would never mistreat and make them feel sad or even lonely. Yet here she was, breaking her own promise. Ashamed by her own self, she turned to the little girl beside her to apologize, only to find her tearing up. In an instant, she was once more on her knees, her hand reaching for the child's cheek to wipe the tears away.

The words left her lips, spoken in a rueful tone.

"She didn't mean…"

But she was cut off, even as the most important words were about to slip from her lips_._ _She didn't mean any of this._

"It hurts mama. I don't want it to hurt anymore…"

As Xiao Mei said those words, their surroundings changed for the umpteenth time and soon enough she realized that they were back at Estelle.

It was winter, maybe sometime near late December. It was cold. Cold enough to snow. And indeed in a short while white snowflakes began dancing around them. It was a beautiful and also rare spectacle to behold; beautiful because the landscape about them was gradually engulfed by a pure white veil and rare, because according to the 'Varaa on Sään',_ the Book of the Weather_, snow only fell at Valleria during times of great loss and mourning. The last verified affirmation was over a century ago. The precise date had long been forgotten, but Sakura had a hunch it was during the mutiny of the Frynnians.

Nevertheless, the beauty of the scenery was marred by a piercing cry of hopelessness. She recognized the voice straight away.

"Oh gods, Syaoran! She's gone. Our little Mei is gone!"

It was her other self.

Outside the walls of Estelle she was bidding the other Syaoran farewell. He was leaving. Not to separate himself from her, but to search for their daughter. Up on his horse, he seemed majestic and yet…

A look of sadness haunted his features, his auburn eyes dim with worry.

"Find her. Find our daughter Syaoran. I want to see her again. I want to say that I'm sorry and just how much I love her. I want to see her grow up. So please… find her and come back home safely."

"Hiragizawa and Yamazaki have already ridden north and south. I will ride east. I will find her, Sakura. I'll bring our Mei home without fail, even if it's the last thing I do. The same goes for the others…"

"I'm grateful that your friends volunteered to search for Mei with you. You three are the fastest riders in entire Valleria. When you get back, I will thank all of you properly."

"We'll be back in three days at most. At dawn, look east…"_  
_

"I will. And Syaoran-draug?"

"What is it, Sakura?"

"Aishitemasu._ I love you._ So please be careful. I don't know what I'll do if anything bad happens to you too…"_  
_

"Mo aishitemasu, Sakura-loth. _I love you too, Sakura-blossom_. I will come back safely, I promise. All of us will…"

And then he spoke to his horse, whispering in the animal's ear.

"Noro lim. _Ride fast._ Noro lim. _Ride fast._ Noro band. _Ride safe…_"

From that moment time seemed to pass within the blink of an eye with each sunrise and each sunset following one another in a matter of a few seconds. Before she knew it, the dawn of the third day was already here and her other self was waiting for her Syaoran and the others to return. This time they were on a balcony and she couldn't help but notice how tightly her other self was gripping the railing. Her knuckles had turned white and Sakura could also feel the sting her other self was no doubt feeling. Such pain seemed to be meaningless though and Sakura couldn't help but be amazed.

Her other self was now leaning over the railing as though seeking to see further ahead to the horizon. But even with the eyes of an Eldar, there was nothing on the horizon for her to see. No rider on his horse.

The hours of the day passed one after the other and the bright sun gave its place to the clear moon, the snow had already melt away. Still, there was no sign of the ones her other self had been expecting. And yet, she remained firmly in her place. She knew they would be here. Any minute now. Syaoran would never break a promise.

And so the third day was gone…

It wasn't until the fifth morning that two small outlines that grew bigger and bigger headed to Estelle. It was a rider and his horse.

Soon the figures made it into the town and a deafening cry of grief pierced the silence of the dawn. That day, exactly seven days after the younger daughter's death, a crimson sun rose. A bleeding sun…

The rider that had just arrived was Syaoran and the horse was Brego, but it wasn't just the two of them. A third figure which belonged to a third, much younger person, was nestled securely within the older elf's embrace seemingly sleeping serenely. But that wasn't the case.

The little body was quivering and therefore was curled up into a small ball. So small that they both realized it belonged to a child. The young one's breathing was uneven. And yet soft. So soft that it was barely there. And yet it was fighting. Fighting not to fade away and be forgotten. So cruel and unfair._  
_

It was hard. So hard to acknowledge that the little child was slowly losing the battle with consciousness. So hard to accept that the fragile thread that withheld the little child in life, was slowly perishing. There was no question to it. The child was dying…

Sakura gasped in sync with her other self, their linked hearts tightening almost painfully upon realizing this and also to whom the little body belonged to.

Xiao Mei…

His stuttering voice made their hearts clench even more, but it was the words what almost caused them to shatter into thousand minuscule pieces.

"I found our Mei wounded right across her chest two days ago at the borders with the Outer Lands, trying to cross the river. I examined the injury and it seems to be self-inflicted. But how she managed to injure herself this badly without a weapon or how she managed to reach that far on foot in only three days is beyond me. Her body was freezing and by the time we reached the Eastern Fields she had already lost conscience. But up until that moment she was mumbling one thing. That she had to disappear…"

At that moment a crimson stain painted the dress the child was wearing. Right across her small chest. It was blood. Her own blood.

It was too late for the little child. Too late for her. Too late for Xiao Mei. Her soul had already entered the White Shores of Argonath, the far-green land of eternal life where all souls are destined to wind up at the end of their journey. Mortals and immortals.

Xiao Mei…

The little girl ceased breathing and another deafening cry of grief pierced the silence of the dawn. And everything was bathed in darkness. Solid, unlit darkness. Just like it all began…

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hi everyone! Here's the long-awaited tenth chapter. It took me longer to write than I originally planned. Also, you may have already noticed it but I made some extra changes to the first and also second chapter. Same goes for the prologue. I will edit the other chapters too in time because I don't really like how my nineteen year-old self wrote. So please bare with me. I intend to finish this story so rest assured. And now time for my thank-you's. So a big thank you to all those who have read, reviewed and added this silly fic of mine to their favorite and/or alert lists. And also thank you for sticking with me for so long. Till next time, matta ne!

**Explanations: **according to Tolkien, Argonath is called the place where the Sculptures of the Kings are. These sculptures were two enormous statues of Isildur and his brother Anarion at the river Aduin on the entrance of the northern borders with Gondor. I liked the name so much so I took the liberty to use it for the purposes of my own story.

**Meaning of the Poems:**

_First:_

_You are not bound to loss and silence.  
For you are not bound to the circles of this world.  
All things must pass away,  
All life is doomed to fade..._

_Sorrowing you must go [and yet you are not without hope]_

**Note: **The section in brackets is part of the poem on which the song is based, but does not appear in the actual song

_Second  
_

_I saw a star rise high in the _  
_Evening sky, _  
_It hung like a jewel, _  
_Softly shining._

_I saw a star fade in the _  
_Evening sky, _  
_The dark was too deep and so light died, _  
_Softly pining._

_For what might have been, _  
_For what never was. _  
_For a life, long lived. _

**Links:**

This is how the lilies Xiao Mei was hidding look like: **_ bios. weddingbee pics / 55787 / flowers _ lily _ chocolate . gif _**(just delete the spaces for the URL to work properly)

Lastly this is a white ladybug : **_ www. chem. wisc. edu /areas /reich /group /Ladybug - white - 82 - 07 - 16 - 600 px . jpg_ **(just delete the spaces for the URL to work properly)


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